Secondhand Sinners (22 page)

“Yeah. Absolutely.”

“Good. Say it, then. Whatever it is, I can take it.”

“Okay.” She sat up straight, took Miller’s hand, looked him square in the eyes, and said, “Duh.”

Miller imagined all kinds of reactions she’d have if she ever found out. That wasn’t one of them. “What? You’re not surprised?”

“Yeah. When I first figured it out, like four years ago.”

“Four years?” That was before Sara left. “You’ve known for four years? Why didn’t you say anything?”

“Cause it was obvious you and Mom didn’t want me to know.”

“How did you figure it out?”

“Well, the fact that there are no pictures of Mom pregnant with me or in the hospital having me was one clue. I don’t look a thing like her, and I never bought that story about how I looked like her great aunt. Plus, she never loved me. At first I was like, well I can’t be Mom’s, but I must be Daddy’s because I have his smile. Then one day in health class my teacher said that kids can pick up a caregiver’s subtle gestures and facial expressions. So I was like, maybe I am adopted. That’s why I was so sad when Mom left, ‘cause I was afraid you were going to leave me too.”

“I’m sorry. I should have been honest with you from the beginning.”

“It’s okay. I know you love me. Why are you telling me this now?”

“Because some other people found out today…including Emily. One of those people, Alan Dupree, came out to the house this morning right after I got home from dropping you off. He said her father had a stroke, and he offered to take her to see him.”

“Oh no. Norman had a stroke?”

“No, see. That’s just it. He didn’t. Alan was lying, and I only found out about that a few minutes ago. I don’t trust this man, and I want to go get Emily from him.”

“Does he have Jack?”

“Yes.”

“Let’s go find them.” Abby stood up and hitched her backpack over her shoulder.

“I don’t know where they are. I don’t even know where to look.”

“In this tiny town? How hard can it be?”

“Harder than you might think. I really need you to go home and be there in case Emily and Jack show up.”

“Do you think they will?”

“I don’t know. Probably not.”

“Then why make me go home? I could help you.”

“As much as I want to help Emily and Jack, you’re my first concern. If you’re home I’ll know you’re safe.”

“What about you? Who’s going to keep you safe?”

“Don’t you worry about me. I know something Alan doesn’t know. I have access to some inside information about how to find them.”

“You do?” Abby let out a breath of relief. “Thank God.”

Miller let out his own silent sigh of relief that she didn’t ask who his source for the inside information was. She’d never agree to be taken home so he could go out there and find Emily and Jack if she knew he was basing his whole plan on a Capricorn with a little social media savvy.

CHAPTER

TWENTY-FOUR

Emily

Emily woke to the sound of ringing in her ears and a pounding pulse in her head. She opened her eyes. She was lying in the back seat of Alan’s car, and he was standing at her feet, leaning in and shaking her. The brightness of the sun hurt her eyes, so she closed them again.

“Thank God. I thought I’d killed you,” he said with a hint of genuine concern in his voice. “Can you sit up?”

“Huh?”

“Can you sit up?”

“Where are we?”

“I found Band-Aids and Tylenol.”

“Tell me where we are.”

“Levi’s. I checked the key you had in your pocket. You were right about it belonging to your brother. I let myself in. We’ll need to find some sunglasses.”

“Sunglasses?”

“To hide the black eye.”

Emily touched her eye and winced at the pain.

“Yeah. I’m not sure what to do about your lip, might have to tell people you busted it when you fell. Come on. You need to get out of there so we can clean you up.”

She kept her eyes closed as she sat up and pressed her fingertips to her temple, where the pounding had gotten worse. “You okay, Jack?” Jack didn’t answer. She slowly opened her eyes, looked around the car, and started to panic when she didn’t see her son.

“Where’s Jack?”

“He’s not here.”

“What? Oh my God…” She tried to scoot out of the back seat but moved too fast and got dizzy again. “Where is he?”

Alan squatted down. “Don’t worry. I put him somewhere safe.”

“You put him somewhere? Are you crazy?”

He cocked his head and eyed her for a few seconds. “No, I’m not. I said don’t worry. He’s safe.”

“You son of a bitch.”

“The other way wasn’t working,” Alan said. “This way you’ll have to focus. The quicker we find that key, the faster we can get finished with our little chore and the sooner I can reunite you with your annoying, loud-mouthed son.”

“Where is he?” she asked, willing herself not to cry. “He’ll be scared. He can’t take care of himself. He can’t—”

“You’re wasting time, Emily.”

“Let me call someone to go pick him up so he won’t be alone.”

“You mean Miller? No way. The only way I know you’ll cooperate with me is if I’m the only one who knows where your brat is. He’s fine. For now. Now come on. The more time you waste, the longer he’s out there all alone.” Alan offered her his hand. She took it and let him pull her out of the back seat. Her legs were so weak, he had to support her as they walked into Levi’s house. She hated the feeling of his arm around her.

Every step she took felt like a step away from Jack. She was so scared for him, so terrified to think of him all alone in a strange place. They’d had the stranger danger conversation several times but never talked about what to do if he found himself alone in a strange place.

Alan led her to Levi’s bathroom, where she sat on the closed lid of the toilet while he wet a washcloth. She winced when he touched the towel to her forehead and dabbed it along her hairline.

“I’m really sorry about all this, Em,” he said, moving his shaking hand from a cut along her hairline to the cut on her lip. “I feel terrible about all these cuts and bruises. I got so frustrated with your kid yelling like he was. Then you were yelling at me. I wished you would’ve focused. Everything’s going to be better now. Once you remember where the key is, I’ll make it up to you.”

“You could never make this up to me.”

Alan ignored her comment. “I’ll make it up to you as soon as I get this money.”

Emily knew Alan wanted her to make him feel better for abusing her and Jack and leaving him behind. He wanted her to tell him she understood he had it rough and he couldn’t help himself.

He finished cleaning up her face and moved to bandaging her scraped knees. Then he tossed some clothes on her lap. “I found these in your suitcase. Put ‘em on. I’ll step outside and let you have some privacy. Take your time.”

Take my time?

He really was crazy. He closed the door and Emily hated him even more for trying to act chivalrous after what he’d done to her and Jack, like he was Dr. Jekyll rescuing her from Mr. Hyde. She clutched the side of the sink and pulled herself up. She examined her swollen eye and busted lip in the mirror and wondered if Jack saw her face before Alan stashed him somewhere. Then she flashed to Alan holding the gun to Jack’s head and squeezing the trigger. She remembered that time when Jack was three and almost got hit by a car when he ran out into the street. She called out for him to stop and was so glad he was okay. There was a split second, though, as the car sped down the road, that she wondered how much easier her life could be if Jack was gone. Now all she could think about was how life wouldn’t be worth living if her son wasn’t in it. It made her nauseated to think about the possibility.

She hoped he was locked in a room somewhere, not out in the open where he could wander away. She hoped he wasn’t too scared. She hoped she could get through this quickly and that Alan would keep his promise to take her back to him when they were finished. She hoped he was even telling the truth about Jack being okay in the first place. None of that mattered, though, did it? How could she find a key that didn’t exist?

She put on the clean shirt and shorts and left the bathroom. Alan was waiting for her outside the door. He escorted her to Levi’s dining table, gave her a glass of water and four Tylenol. She swallowed them, her chest aching when she noticed the small pile of Legos on the table.

Alan sat down next to her and snapped two Lego bricks together. “I never had Legos growing up. I begged for them every year for Christmas, and every December 25
th
, I got a drunk stepdad and an ass-whipping for crying that I didn’t get the Legos.”

“I don’t give a shit,” Emily snapped.

He clamped her hand in his, leaned in close, and squeezed tight. “You’d better. ‘Cause this time, if I don’t get what I want, you don’t see your kid again.”

She yanked her hand away. “There is no key.”

“There is a key, Em. You need to think harder. Now that your kid is out of the picture, that shouldn’t be a problem.”

“How was he when you left?”

“Who?”

“Who else? Jack.”

“He was fine. I don’t know what you’re getting so worked up over. Kids get left at home alone all the time. It’s good for them. Makes them tougher.”

“In case you didn’t notice, my son has special needs. Besides, you didn’t leave him at home. He’s in a strange place.”

“Now it’s my turn to say I don’t give a shit.”

“I need to know he’s okay. Did you leave him in a room or out in the open?”

“What does it matter?”

“If he’s out in the open, he might wander away and get lost.”

“I put him in a room. A dark one. I told him not to move or I’d kill you. He’s not going to go anywhere. So stop asking.”

“God, Alan. He takes things literally, you know? He’s going to believe that if he even moves a muscle that you’ll kill me. He must so scared.”

“I’d say he’s terrified. He was crying so hard I think he may have wet himself. There was also blood all over him from when you dropped him when you fell. I was trying to be a gentleman by sparing all those details from you. If you want to know more, say the word. We’ll sit here at Levi’s table and discuss it while your little boy sits alone in the dark, trying not to move so you won’t die.”

Shit.
She was making it worse. “Okay. I’ll stop asking,” she said, trying to keep her voice from breaking.

“He’ll be fine. Stop looking at me like I killed him and focus.”

This was all too much. Emily felt so helpless she wanted to cry. She couldn’t let herself go there. That wouldn’t do Jack any good. Neither would leaving him alone until Alan decided to be generous and to take her to get him. She had to
do
something to gain a little control, which meant she needed to think clearly. As much as she hated to do it, she imagined Jack was asleep in the dark somewhere and pushed him into the back of her mind.

Jack’s asleep. He’s fine. What can you do right now to get some control back?

What did Alan really want? Money? Sex? Love? No. Approval? That was a possibility. She’d have to find a way to give that to him. Hopefully that would calm him down enough to see that he was acting like a lunatic.

“I can’t believe Hoyt did that to you. You know? Pointed a gun at you and squeezed the trigger. Takes a lot of bravery to survive something like that and still become a good man.”

Alan sat there staring at the Legos in his hand, her blood on his jeans, her blood on shirt, his chest rising and falling in a quick cadence.

Jack’s asleep. He’s fine.

“I mean, not many people know what it’s like to have their dad threaten to shoot them.”

“Hoyt wasn’t my dad.”

“He was the only dad you had. You didn’t have a choice in the matter. But look at you now, a policeman who’s out there defending people from all the other Hoyts out there.”

He shrugged. “I guess.”

Jack’s asleep. He’s fine. Jack’s asleep.

“You protect people. It’s in your nature. You’ve been protecting since before you went into the Air Force.” She slid her hand on top of his. “Do you remember that time you found that litter of puppies on the side of the road next to our property?”

Alan lowered his head.

“You were so concerned when you showed up at my house with that box full of dogs that you had no idea what to do with. It was raining so hard. You remember that, don’t you?”

Alan closed his eyes and nodded.

“You remember what you did? You drove them all the way out to the pound in Ardmore that didn’t put dogs down because I asked you to.”

“I do remember that.” When he looked at her, he looked so much like the teenager she remembered, far from innocent but still nowhere near the sadistic bastard who’d taken Jack away from her. “I brought that box to you because I thought you might like me better if you saw my tender side.”

“Yes.” She sat up a little in her chair, encouraged that Alan was starting to come around. “I did see it. I know it’s still there.”

“Truth is, I found those little pups under our house after I shot their mother in the head with a pistol.”

“W-what?” Emily’s mouth was too dry for her to speak in anything other than a whisper. She tried to pull her hand away from his. He clenched it so tight she couldn’t get out of his grip.

“I gathered those dumb dogs up and drove them out to your place hoping to impress you, and once that was done, I didn’t give a shit those mangy animals. I put ‘em all in a burlap sack along with their dead mother and about three or four heavy rocks. Then I threw them into the stock pond behind your parents’ house.” He put her hand to his lips and kissed the back of it. “I wonder if their skeletons are still out there, or if the fish ate ‘em.”

“You’re sick.”

“Exactly.” He dropped her hand. “So how ‘bout you remember where that key is so I don’t get it in my mind that Jack would be better off in a burlap sack.”

Any urge to cry was gone the instant Alan issued this last threat. She had no idea where his damn key was, wasn’t even sure there was one, but she would get Hoyt’s treasure for him if she had to rob the bank herself. It seemed impossible that a few hours ago she was in Miller’s house, looking through Daniel’s old things with Jack downstairs watching TV.

Daniel’s old things.
“Wait…I…” she closed her eyes and tried to visualize the contents of the box spilling out onto the bed as Miller dumped it out. Two arrowheads. A dozen or so beat-up Matchbox cars. A key. “There is a key.”

“Now we’re talking. Where is it?”

“It’s at Miller’s. It’s in a box of Daniel’s old belongings. I wonder if he’s still out counting the cattle?”

“Let’s go.” Alan yanked Emily up by her wrist and pulled her to his car.

The quick trip was barely enough time to say a prayer that Miller was still out. She didn’t want to see him, didn’t want to see anything or anyone that reminded her of how happy she had been only a few hours earlier. She’d see Miller and think of him helping Jack catch a fish, giving him a high-five, or carrying him up the stairs. Seeing Miller now would make her think of Jack, and if she thought of her missing son, she’d cry. She couldn’t cry. She refused to.

When they got to Miller’s, Alan parked several yards away behind some trees and pulled Emily by her elbow up to the house. He unlocked the door with a key he had on his key chain. He must’ve seen the horrified look Emily didn’t even try to hide because he held up the key and smiled. “Sara had this made for me back when we were messin’ around.”

“Have you been using it?”

“Why the hell would I?”

“You have a tendency for taking things that don’t belong to you.”