Seeker (Shadows) (26 page)

“You’re tough.” Samson smiles as he kisses my forehead. “Of course they tied you up.”

“He…
He
tied me up. Ocean did.” I hate that I miss him so much because I’m still angry.

“I’m sorry, Kara.” He sighs. “This is such a mess. A few people want new identities, and The Middle Men is loaded, but it’s a lot of people to support for a lifetime.”

I frown. “People can work. Plenty of The Middle Men hold regular jobs.” And I’m well aware of the mess. I’ve spent my life in this organization and spent most of the night helping to clean it up.

The details of my failure or how I feel aren’t worth mentioning because I haven’t been asked. It’s almost more insulting than being yelled at.

“And plenty only work for the organization,” he counters.

“But now they can work anywhere else they like.” It seems like we’ve all lost here, the least the members can do is be graceful about moving on.

“The problem, Kara, is that when we sign up for our jobs to be for the organization, we’re given a promise of protection, and without our gifts, no one can offer protection and none of the people can do their jobs. It’s going to be a mess for a long time.”

I push to sitting. “I’ll shower and get some real clothes on, and then maybe I should do something more.”

Samson pushes me back down to the bed. “You’ve been a prisoner for the past few days. You probably haven’t slept in forever. Why don’t you rest?”

“Because it’s my fault that it happened!” I push out of bed.

Samson shakes his head. “It’s no one’s fault. The right people got together at the right time and I think your dad guessed you had about a ten percent chance of success.”

And I was sent anyway. And not told I’d almost definitely fail. I hate my parents a little bit right now, too. I can’t keep losing people.

“Kara. Your dad wants you to stay in your room until they know no one will hurt you. People were jealous that you got the assignment, and with the way it turned out…”

My whole body tenses in anger as I think about what I could have been spared.

Samson hugs me from the side, knowing I don’t want it. “You’re angry at a lot of people right now. Don’t let it take over, okay?”

I give him one nod without even briefly considering taking his advice.

THIRTY

Landon

I’m going to miss my sailboat, but this is good, too. Dean and Addison are flying back from New York today after spending time with their families. Kent Prince is all for helping us out, giving advice, and being a wiser voice of reason from someone
with a lot of life experience. He also has a lot of convictions about doing the right thing after spending most of his life pushing boundaries.

“You thinking about your mom?” Micah asks as I pull the new boat out of the harbor. Something sleeker and much, much faster that still has room for our crew. All six of them if Ocean’s talk goes well.

“Which one?” The bitterness over my situation hasn’t gone away yet, and might not for a while.

I meet Ocean’s mom tomorrow, but my parents flew down a few days ago. I held my mom tighter than I ever have, and realized something important. “The mom who raised me is my mom.”

“And your dad?” She squeezes my shoulder.

I sigh again instead of punching something like I want to. “I have my Uncle Ethan.”

“Soon to be my step-dad.” Micah grins.

I push down on the throttle of the new
boat as we pass the “no wake” buoys with nothing but ocean in front of us. “And we have to be in the New Orleans’ harbor tomorrow?” I ask.

“Tomorrow,” she agrees.

“So this is our last night on the ocean alone?”

Her smile is full of the best kind of mischief as she steps next to where I’m standing and rests her arms loosely around my neck, forcing me to look over her head to navigate. “Our very last one.”

“Let’s make it count.” I wag my brows and push the throttle down until we’re flying at close to fifty miles per hour, which is a big deal in a boat this size.

“Woo!” Micah lets go of me to put her hands in the air in the wind, the sun shining on her gorgeous face, and she’s right. We’re going to stick with the group and we’re going to do amazing things. It’s a vision of hers that I definitely want to be tied to.

I think again about how it’s our last night, and once we step off this boat, Micah’s mom is going to want to hear everything (which we definitely won’t tell her) and the wedding and Dean and Addison and Kara and Ocean are all meeting us here. I can’t wait to show them our new digs. Well, if the whole Kara/Ocean thing goes the way Micah hopes it will. She’s seen about a million endings there.

But before all that insanity starts. I need my girl. Alone. Just for a bit. My hands shake a little as I pull back on the throttle much sooner than I intended to, but far enough away from the island to feel alone in the water.

Micah’s smile still fills her face, but she turns toward me. “Aren’t you excited to be back with the group?”

Micah talks like it’s been forever, when it’s only been a couple of weeks.

Our small group destroyed an organization that had warped out of control over time. We set people free who had been trapped for hundreds of years, and they somehow spared us our talents in gratitude. We definitely did the right thing.

“You’re looking very thoughtful for someone who was just hollering as we sped around the Caribbean in his new toy.” She smirks and the
way I love her hits me again.

I either have to do it n
ow or not for a while. I pull the boat to a stop and cut the engine, letting us bob in the small waves.

It’s one thing to do this as a joke, but another to do it for real. And I’m not even sure why it matters so much. She’s right. We’re young. Way too young to be thinking about this, but I take her hands anyway.

“Micah.”

“I think we’ve established that,” she teases.

“No.” I’m seriously freaking out a bit. “I need you serious for a minute.”

Her eyes widen as I pull out the very simple ring. A band made of tiny diamonds.

“You don’t have to marry me tomorrow, Micah. I mean, I’d do it. But…” I push out a breath and decide if I’m doing this, I’m doing it all the way so I get down on one knee, still keeping her hand in mine. “Micah Johnson. I love you like crazy. There is absolutely no other woman in the universe that could make me happy. You complete me.” I wink because I’ve used that line on her before. “Marry me.”

Her hand starts to shake in mine before she drops to her knees in front of me, and nods.

“See?” I tease. “That wasn’t so hard.”

Now my hands are shaking as I slide the ring on her finger.

Micah’s arms are around me before I can admire how freaking perfect the ring is I picked out.

“Yes. Of course, yes.” She pulls away slightly. “But you’re telling my dad.”

I hold her as tightly as I can—pressing us together and it still doesn’t feel close enough. This amazing girl who practically dropped into my backyard and changed my life forever.

“Here’s to a million more adventures.” I give her a kiss.

“And a million more after that.” She kisses me back.

“And more after that.” I kiss her again.

She pulls back just far enough for me to see her face. “I love you Landon Michaels. You have no idea.”

This time I throw one of her lines back at her from what feels like lifetimes ago. “I have some.”

Kara

For the past two weeks, I’ve been staying at a hotel and trying to help in any way I can while hiding myself from Middle Men who might not “react well” to me being at the house. My parents’ words, not mine.
Not that I’ve actually spoken to them.

I’ve been focusing on the task. On the now. On what needs to be done, but things are slowing down.
I actually wrote a report on my total failure. The thing is, it wasn’t a failure. It was, but it wasn’t.

I
hate that I know Landon’s group did the right thing. I wanted to be right—it would have meant that the things I grew up with were right—but they weren’t. My world feels shattered, like I’m floating without direction or anything to ground me. I wish beyond anything that setting the shadows free hadn’t happened the way it did, but looking at it all now that it’s over, I’m finally starting to understand. I wish beyond anything to go back in time and tell myself that Landon’s right. That he knows what he’s doing, but I can’t. I don’t get that second chance. Right now I need to figure out who I am outside of being a Seeker.

I kick my feet in the shallow hotel pool
, enjoying the cool water moving between my toes. Without conscious thought, I flip my phone open again to see Ocean’s text.

I miss you. I want to talk. I want to see you. As soon as you’re ready, tell me and I’ll be there.

I leave the text on my screen as I think about how completely I’ve lost everything. How my whole life was sort of shattered, and I don’t want to go to him just because I have nowhere else to be.

“Just go, Kara.” Samson rests an arm over my shoulders. Startling me.

“What are you doing here? And what are you talking about?” I shove the phone in my pocket.

“Go get the guy. We both know you want to. We both know your parents are going to be buried in work for so long that there’s no point in sticking around.”

And because I’m not sure if I even want a relationship with them at this point.

“So, what will you do?” I ask.

“I’m moving to San Francisco. I love it there. Gorgeous city. Great school. I’m going to college for something totally useless like art.” He gives me a squeeze. “Which answers another one of your questions in that I’m here because I’m catching a plane.”

“Art isn’t useless.” I bump him.

“You know what I mean. Being part of
them
.” He widens his eyes. “Felt like everything, and I think I missed out on a lot because of that.”

I know he’s trying to make me feel better, but it doesn’t help. It wasn’t his life in the same way it was mine. It was everything for me, and after the blow of being wrong about the shadows, being outside of that circle when I could have been in, and feeling betrayed by the first guy I’ve let myself really have feelings for…

“Just go to him, Kara. Go talk to your parents, and then go. You won’t be able to move on until you get that settled.” Even Samson’s freckly face is so serious, and I hate it when I know he’s right.

I let myself give a dramatic slump and he immediately gives me a smacking kiss on the side of my head. “That’s my girl. Tell me all about it after you talk, okay?”

“Promise.” I peck his cheek before he turns and walks away.

“Take care of yourself!” He waves without looking back and I
sit next to the pool of my hotel feeling more lost and alone than I ever remember feeling.

“So…” I stand, uncertain, in the door of Dad’s office. I know they don’t want me here, but I came early in the morning in the hopes of seeing as few people as possible. I’m not sure how many of them are still my friends, and as we all start new lives, I’m wondering how important that is.

Dad runs his hands over and over his grey hair and stares absently out the window. Almost all our missing people are back from their travels, but not quite all. Dad still isn’t sure what to do with everyone, but energy in the house won’t be a problem anymore and it’s not like they don’t have room.

MAC has disappeared to who knows where. Licking his wounds probably. I’d stay hidden if my company crumpled.

“I was thinking of taking off for a while,” I say. My voice shakes because I’m not even sure why I’m here talking to him. He certainly doesn’t deserve it—neither of my parents do.

Dad sighs and turns to face me. There’s regret in his features, but I don’t know if it’s regret in sending me to do a job he knew was nearly impossible, or regret that he even attempted to use me at all. Or maybe it’s not regret and simply disappointment. No matter what, I need space from this place for a while.

“Dad?” I ask.

“Same offer as everyone else. Wouldn’t be fair if it wasn’t. A hundred thousand dollars to get a start, and money to get you to where you’re going. I can direct deposit into your account.”

His words are harsh. This is my home. Has been my home. Does this mean I’m just a number?

“But…”

“I can’t play favorites, not even now.” He sighs. “Especially not now. It’s not like you can stay here.”

Especially.

Right. Because some people might see it as my fault what’s happened to us all instead of blaming my parents for lying (which most people won’t know) or blaming them for sending me along with someone who had almost no training. He should be groveling. Begging forgiveness. Instead I’m being dismissed.

“You going away for a while would probably be smart.” He sighs.

I swallow the lump in my throat as I glance around for signs of mom and then I’m sad again when I don’t see any.