Silver Heart (31 page)

Then it hit me.

“No. Not mess.” I shook my head.
That was the wrong word.
“Figure out my life,” I corrected. “My beautiful, perfect life.”

“How do we not repeat the mistakes of six years ago?” Sawyer asked.

“We work at it. We work at it really hard even when things get tough.” My arms slid around his waist and I pressed my body against his. “When you left last night, I wasn’t trying. I was already thinking about the future. I was jumping to the last page of our book and trying to figure out how all this would end.”

A slow smile spread across his face. “Baby, you need to start enjoying the present, because we won’t have an end. Our story will just keep going on and on. The book of Silver and Sawyer will span an entire lifetime. It will be longer than the freaking
Iliad
. Remember when you tried to help me get through that?” His smile morphed into a full-brown grin.

“As I recall, you never made it to the end,” I laughed.

“Rest assured that I’m going to read every single page of our book. I promise. Especially the dirty scenes. I’m going to read those over and over again.” In a span of a few sentences, Sawyer’s face had managed to transform from a sweet smile to a joking grin to an incredibly sexy smirk. For the life of me I couldn’t choose which expression I loved more.

Probably all of them.

Then he sobered and said, “I hope you know that I never want to stand in the way of anything you wish to achieve. Even if you decide that med school is your calling, know that I’ll be there for you every step of the way. I’ve already waited six years; I’ll wait as long as it takes for you to be mine. I want all of you—including your medical degree or photography business, or whatever you need to do and whoever you choose to be.”

“I needed to hear that,” I said as his lips grazed mine.

His words or his touch—I didn’t know which one was more intoxicating. My entire body hummed to life when he was around.

“Hell, even if you decide to join a convent I’ll still stay by your side.”

I chuckled at the absurdity of the idea. “In the convent?”

“Anywhere you are, Silver.” I could feel his lips smiling as he pressed them against mine. “Though the whole convent idea may make certain things a little more difficult,” he said.

“Is that so?” I murmured into his mouth.

“Things like this…” He snaked out his tongue to lick my top lip. “…may be forbidden.” His hands glided down the curve of my back until they were cupping my ass. “And things like this are
definitely
forbidden.”

“Then I guess my lifelong dream of becoming a nun is out of the question,” I joked. “There’s no way that I could behave around you.”

“Good. Because the things I have planned for us definitely involve a lot of misbehavior.” My ear tingled when he whispered into it. His voice covered my body like warm honey, melting on my skin and seeping into my insides.

“Keep demonstrating,” I begged. Pressing my hips into his, my body suddenly filled with a warm, moist ache. It began as a tiny ripple in the center of my core then spanned out into every cell of my entire being, making me yearn for an explosion of release.

Sawyer’s eyes heated as he as he felt me tremble underneath him. “We’re halfway to the other mountain peak.” He glanced through the window. “How many times do you think I can make you scream out my name in five minutes?”

Oh, my God…

My knees buckled at those words. Sawyer steadied me, then slid his hands down to my backside, cupping me over my woolen dress.

“Another skirt. I like it,” he murmured, edging his way under the fabric. “But these stockings gotta go. Right away. Unless you want me to rip them off again.”

I kind of did. But I obeyed his request and helped him remove them. Once they were off, I slipped my feet back into my boots and off the cold floor.

Sawyer’s eyes drank in my bare legs as he treated me to a sultry smile. “Much better.” Sinking on the bench behind him, he reached out to grab my waist. “Come here.”

“You’re quite demanding today,” I said, slightly surprised by the intensity in his voice.

Not that I was complaining. Sawyer’s impatient hunger for me was a pretty big turn-on.

“We have five minutes before you send me packing, Silver,” he warned. “The more time we waste, the less time I’ll have to do this…” His right hand drifted down my hip to the inside of my thigh. Scaling up my heated skin, he looped one finger through the bottom of my thong and pulled me closer.

“
Sawyer
…”

“Looks like you’re not wasting any time either.” His voice dipped to a husky, low growl as another finger teased my entrance. “You’re already so wet for me.”

Key word—
him
. My body had never responded to anyone this way. It was as if I was conditioned to crave him and only him.

“Don’t think it’ll take much to make you scream. And melt.” Plunging inside me, he hooked his fingers and drew me to him so that I was straddling his lap. My thighs parted wide open, leaving me completely exposed to him.

And those skilled fingers…rubbing me, strumming me, penetrating me…

“Oh, God…
Sawyer!
”

Thankfully, the windows of the gondola were tinted. I just hoped the cabin was also soundproof. He smothered my cries with his lips, continuing his passionate assault on every nerve in my body.

The combination of his rapid, impaling strokes and his own arousal, pressing up tightly against me, sent me soaring higher than the mountain peaks we were currently ascending. It wasn’t long before I was tumbling over the edge, unraveling around him as I drenched his hand with warm, liquid bliss.

“We’ve still got four minutes.” His breath was blazing hot against my ear, smelling of sweet mint. Fire and ice washed over me simultaneously, sending excited shivers down my skin.

“Only four?” I whimpered, slowly tumbling down from my high. The realization that he’d be gone after that dawned on me.

At least this time, it wouldn’t be a permanent goodbye.

“Don’t worry.” A naughty grin tugged at the corners of his lips. “I’m going to break world records for both speed and style today, Silver. This is going to be one ride you’ll never forget. I promise.”

Before he’d even finished speaking, I was already unzipping his jeans. I wanted him so badly—the sudden, aching need pulsing through me was more powerful than anything I’d ever felt. I wanted to fuse myself with him, feel his presence on a deeper level than I’d ever felt before.

There were no horny forest rangers to help us out this time, but thankfully Sawyer came prepared. Upon sliding on the condom, he guided my hips over his length, filling me to the point where I was ready to burst. His name was already a moan on my lips as I dug my nails into his back, feeling him throb inside me. All before we’d even begun moving.

One hand grasping my waist and the other tangled through my hair, Sawyer set the rhythm—rough and hard and exhilarating all at the same time.

Green eyes claimed me, and though the position should have made me feel like I was the one in control, I completely lost myself in him. My desires for thinking, breathing—hell, even
living
—were completely swallowed up by my desperate need for pleasure and closeness. My entire existence was centered on this very moment with Sawyer.

Soon, we were both panting, breathless from the hurried tempo of our movements. I could feel the gondola swaying beneath us—back and forth, up and down, threatening to tear away from the cable holding it safely in place and plunge us both to the abyss below.

It only took a few moments for me to break apart again. Placing my palms against the wall behind Sawyer’s head, I cried out his name as my entire world exploded. Tremors continued to rock my body even as the pressure within me subdued, but Sawyer didn’t allow me to stop moving. Gripping harder, he pulled me down onto him, thrusting so deep he quickly set off a second earthquake within my already sensitive core.

“I’m glad you finally decided to let go and be mine, baby,” he breathed as I came, my muscles seizing around him. “No more holding back.” His warm tongue slid into my mouth as he penetrated my soul with those words, unleashing his own release with a loud groan.

Just when I thought we couldn’t climb any higher and outdo the ecstatic madness we had just succumbed to, Sawyer’s hand drifted down. A sizzling spark flashed in his eyes as he claimed the throbbing bundle of nerves between my legs with his fingers, forcing me to gasp and immediately winding up my already volatile state of arousal.

“One minute, Silver,” he said, smirking wickedly. “Plenty of time to make more naughty memories.”

When we exited the gondola, I felt like a changed woman. And not because Sawyer had given me a “record-breaking” ride from one mountain peak to another, consisting of the most explicit, mind-blowing experience that tiny car had probably ever been a part of.

No, that ride was the best ride of my life for a much different reason. Somewhere between the Whistler and the Blackcomb peaks, dangling in mid-air, I had discovered exactly who I was. Something just clicked. Partly because of Sawyer, but also because I finally knew what I wanted to do.

I had to tell my parents that I would not be going on with my studies. I wanted to take the next year to rediscover my love of photography. And Sawyer. It was my goal that both of us would still follow our own dreams, while exploring our joint ones along the way. Together.

And even if Sawyer and I didn’t work out—though I no longer had any doubts that we would—I would be okay because I would have my photography. And even if my photography career ended up being a flop, it wouldn’t matter. My main happiness would be found in following my heart and living the life I wanted.

There was no fear in me anymore. Only excitement.

I was no longer pissed off at fate. Maybe fate wasn’t so bad. After all, if I hadn’t been on the phone with Adam when Sawyer had tried to reach me I would have probably picked up his call and told him not to come back for me. It was Maddie who had told him my exact location in the end. The weird coincidence of events could have been destiny. Or a simple, random chance. Whatever it was, I was grateful.

When we stepped out of the gondola, Sawyer touched my arm, gently pulling me back. “Hey, Silver?”

“Yeah?”

“Come back to me when you have it all figured out,” he said. “Please.”

“I will.”

“I want a chance to love you.”

“And I want a chance to be loved,” I told him honestly.

He looped his fingers through the shoulder strap of my Canon. “I’m going to keep your camera hostage. So I can be sure that you’ll return.”

“I’m going to come back to you. I promise.”

I was going to bid my old life goodbye and take a chance on Sawyer. And my camera.

Scared shitless
couldn’t even begin to describe how I felt. But there was also a tiny kernel of excitement blossoming deep within my chest. My body strummed with excitement, swelled with anticipation, and hummed with the desire to let go and just be free.

I was going to lose control, and for the first time in my life I was eagerly anticipating the consequences of this action.

EPILOGUE

“Sawyer Carter, Olympic Gold Medalist,” I said, looking down from atop my seat on the chairlift. “It has a nice ring to it, don’t you think?”

Sawyer’s green eyes sparkled as bright white snow reflected off of them. “I guess we’ll see just how nice in a few weeks when I finally compete.”

“My Boyfriend the Olympic Gold Medalist sounds even better.” Laughing, I leaned over the metal partition between us to kiss him.

“I bet I can top that,” he said huskily.

“Oh, yeah? How so?”

“You’ll find out soon enough.” Then he shot me one of his trademark mischievous smirks. “That is, if you manage to dismount the ski lift without falling on your face.”

“So I basically have a fifty percent chance of finding out.” I was a much better snowboarder now—even occasionally venturing on black diamond hills—but chairlifts still had me tripping.
Literally
.