Take My Dress Off (16 page)

“Shit,” he hissed and nudged me off his hips. He peeled off the rubber and tied it, then shoved it into the foil packet. I settled into the seat and smoothed my skirt down over my thighs as he zipped up his pants.

“We better get going,” he said and turned the key in the ignition. We rode in silence as he guided the car back onto the main road.
Almost Paradise
came on the radio and I sank further into the seat, feeling more alone than ever.

“There’s your song,” teased Chaz. Either it was my imagination or he sounded a little hostile. I leaned forward and snapped the radio off. Almost paradise, the story of my life.

Danielle and I
entered the community center deep in conversation about homecoming. It was our first night of rehearsal for the Holiday Show. The show was an annual fundraiser for the San Luis Rey Food Bank. It was always held in the Hotel Encanto Ballroom. In exchange for an advertising booth businesses were promoted in the newspaper and a commercial on the local cable TV channel. The fashion show was the highlight of the event and Maddie had been running it for years.

I didn’t know if I should ask Chaz to homecoming (would he think it was lame?) or skip it all together. He had been so moody lately I wondered if it would set him off.

“Let’s go to homecoming together,” laughed Danielle. “You can be my date and we’ll dance together like the girls in those fifties sock-hop movies.”

“You’re not my type, Danielle.” I tossed my denim purse onto a chair.

“You’d probably score,” she smiled. “I’m pretty desperate right now.”

I scanned the room. No Chaz, no Dillon, no Donny. But one very handsome waiter heavily engaged in conversation with Maddie. Xavier wore black slacks and a white button down shirt. Given his attire he was either coming from work or going. I noticed many of the girls hanging around, sneaking peaks at him and whispering, wondering who he was.

“What’s Xavier doing here?” asked Danielle. “Did you know about this?”

“No. Maddie never said anything.” But then I hadn’t really been home too much lately. Between school, my horse, and Chaz, I was pretty busy.

“Maybe I won’t need you for a homecoming date after all,” she said with newfound interest.

Xavier turned toward us, cocked his head to the side and sauntered over. “Hello ladies, bet you never expected to see me here tonight.”

Danielle stood straighter and gave him her sweetest smile, which was hilarious since the last time we saw Xavier she was a complete bitch to him.

“Maddie came into the diner last night,” he explained with a flash of white teeth. “She asked me to model. I couldn’t refuse the beautiful Maddie.” He got that right, no one could refuse Maddie. Xavier shoved his hands into his slacks, a shy pout on his full lips.  “I’ve never done this before,” he said and glanced at his shiny, black dress shoes. “You’ll help me, right?” He smiled down to me, his dark eyebrows raised, his eyes gleaming.

Before I could reply, Danielle pounced. “I’ll help you however I can.” She looped her arm through his and led him over to the mirrored wall.  He looked back to me over his shoulder and mouthed, “help.”

“Who’s the new guy?”

I turned to face Dillon. “A waiter from Bob’s Big Boy Maddie fancies.”

Sloane stood behind him, a smirk on her face as she batted her doe eyes at me. I couldn’t believe he had brought her here. This was my territory!

“A waiter, huh? He does look familiar.”

“He goes to San Diego State, plays soccer for them.” Sloane, already bored with our conversation, walked over to talk to Marissa. I waited until Sloane was a safe distance away. “What do you think you’re doing, bringing Sloane here?” I hissed.

He glanced over to Sloane and stepped closer to me like he was going to answer but he didn’t.

I closed the space between us, “Sloane’s not going to be able to handle this…all the girls.”

“Whatever, that’s her problem then,” whispered Dillon. I raised my eyebrows. “She begged to come tonight. I think she’s hoping Maddie will ask her to model.”

“Over my dead body,” I fired back.

Dillon’s eyes widened and he grinned down to me. “Really,” he said and drew me to him, his hands resting on my lower back.

I looked over his shoulder to Sloane. She scowled at me.

“Feeling a little threatened, Paige?”

“As if,” I smirked. Sloane balked. Maybe this could be fun after all. I circled my hands behind his back and whispered into his neck, “I just don’t like her and you’re not too high in my book right now either.

Dillon tugged at my ponytail and tipped my chin up, his dark eyes smoldering. “What do I have to do to change that?”

“Alright, let’s get this started!” yelled Donny clapping his hands as he burst into the middle of the room. Chaz leaned in the doorway behind him looking dangerously handsome in a black leather jacket, charcoal jeans, and black combat boots. I disengaged from Dillon’s embrace but it was too late. I knew that Chaz had seen us because his eyes tracked Dillon as he crossed the room to join Sloane. I trotted over to Chaz and rose up on my toes to give him a peck on the cheek.

“Hey,” he said coolly, sliding down his Ray Bans and glaring at Dillon.

Unfortunately, getting to see Sloane squirm didn’t seem quite as worth it as it had moments before. I wished Dillon and Chaz would just beat the crap out of each other and get over it. Whatever
it
was. Dillon sure knew how to press Chaz’s buttons…that was for sure.

“What’s the bus boy doing here?”

“Maddie asked him.”

“Why?”

He slipped his arm around my shoulder as if protecting what was his and pulled me to his side. “He’s staring at you.”

“No, he’s not.”

Maddie stood in the middle of the room explaining the details of the show as Donny passed out the rehearsal schedules. I wanted to bolt. Dillon I could handle. But not this. I was caught in a war between Chaz and Dillon, Sloane was glaring at me, and Xavier was here too. Why was it always so damn hot in here?
Hello? There’s this great invention called air conditioning!
I started to feel dizzy and leaned against the wall.

“Are you okay, baby?” Chaz asked. His eyes searched mine. “You’re not going to faint again are you?”

“I need to sit down.”

He led me over to a chair and sat down, pulling me down onto his lap. I fanned myself with the schedule. The other models started to notice. Heads turned as I collapsed against Chaz. Marissa nudged Maddie and she rushed over to me. Everyone else began to gather behind her.

“Paige, what’s wrong?” asked Maddie, her eyes scanning mine.

“It’s too hot in here,” I managed to whisper as the darkness swirled around me and tried to pull me under. Donny, Danielle, and Dillon were now gathered at my feet as well.

“They really need some AC in here,” said Sloane taking my predicament at face value. “The fans aren’t enough.” Everyone grumbled in agreement. Danielle rolled her eyes.

“Dillon, can you get her some water, please?” ordered Maddie. “Does anybody have any candy?”

The girls went to their purses, rummaging. Sloane came forward with a pack of Starburst. She waved it in the air like she had found a winning lottery ticket. Sloane handed me a yellow one, of course my least favorite flavor.

Everyone’s least favorite flavor.

Dillon came back with water, avoiding Chaz’s eyes as he handed the paper cup to me.

“Alright everybody, back off, give her some room,” said Donny. “Get back on the wall, please.” He looked down to me and patted my shoulder. “You gonna be okay?” I nodded, grateful to him for taking charge and getting the attention off of me. I felt so foolish with everyone gathered around me like I was going to drop dead at any minute.

“This is happening way too often, Paige,” said Chaz.

“How often?” asked Maddie. She pursed her lips as she timed my pulse with her watch. If Chaz wasn’t behind me he would be receiving a
shut up
glare from me. “Paige?”

“A couple times. I’m not drinking enough water. Eating like I should, maybe. It’s no big deal.”

“I’m taking you in for more tests.”

“I don’t want more tests, I’m fine,” I called after her.

“We’ll talk about this later.” She frowned and turned back to the models. Donny had the music going and directed everyone as he put them into groups.

“Traitor,” I said as I leaned back onto Chaz’s chest.

“Stubborn ass,” Chaz whispered into my ear and kissed me on the cheek. Maddie was always so worried about me because of what happened to my mother. She was perfectly healthy and out of nowhere had an aneurism right after I was born. I noticed Sloane’s gaze in the mirror. She was studying us, a look on her doll face that I couldn’t discern.

We went through the sets of the show pretty quickly and then were put into groups for the opening which was always choreographed because everyone was in it and there was usually a routine. This year the theme was to be
Winter Wonderland
and we would all be in snow gear from the local sporting goods store strutting to a pop remix of
Baby It’s Cold Outside
. Maddie and Donny had been planning it for the last two weeks so I already knew about it. What I didn’t know was that the finale was a winter wedding.

Everyone groaned after it was announced. Usually we were only tortured with bridal attire in the spring. Maddie explained that Cynthia’s Bridal Shop had decided to be a sponsor at the last minute.

We hated modeling bridal attire. The dresses were stiff and uncomfortable because they had to be pinned to fit and the guys were just as uncomfortable in their tuxedos and suits. We had to be very careful with the clothes so they didn’t get damaged or dirty which meant more pressure to get dressed in time and back on the stage. There were a lot of fittings at Cynthia’s Bridal Shop which everyone hated because Cyndi, the owner, was totally mental. Entire Sunday’s (the only day the shop was closed to customers) could be wasted in her tacky gold and pink dressing rooms because she couldn’t make up her mind. Weddings also created animosity between the older girls over who wore the final wedding dress which meant she was the last girl down the runway and had the final shot for the cameras.

I leaned back against Chaz’s chest when Donny announced there would only be one wedding dress (thank God!). Xavier and Karla were going to be the bride and groom, leaving the rest of us as attendants. Karla blushed and gathered her long red hair over her shoulder while the other girls pretended to be happy for her. I looked over to Maddie. She was beaming at Xavier and it suddenly became apparent as to why she had asked him to model. Donny refused to wear tuxedos and Dillon and Chaz were too young to pull off being grooms. I’m sure Chaz and I would be paired in ridiculous matching outfits but there was only one wedding scene so it wouldn’t be that unbearable.

Donny went through the timeline of the rehearsals and then we were dismissed. Everyone gathered into their cliques to chatter and Chaz finally released his grip on me.

“Can I drive you home?” he asked. I nodded and went to inform Danielle that I wouldn’t need a ride. She was busy flirting with Xavier, animatedly waving her hands as she talked and fluttered her lashes. He turned away from her as I approached them.

“You okay?” he asked.

“Yes,” I blushed. “More embarrassed than anything.”

“You don’t need to be.” He squeezed my shoulder. “I’m working tomorrow night. Come by the diner and I’ll give you all the Dr. Peppers and cherries you want,” he smiled warmly.

Danielle wasn’t laughing. Neither was Chaz who had just joined our group.

“Ready to go?”

“Sure.”

Chaz grabbed my hand and nodded over to Donny who shouted “later” back to him, Danielle staked her claim on Xavier, while Sloane threw herself onto Dillon. It was going to be a long month!

“Sloane Pierce
is telling everyone you’re bulimic. No anorexic. Wait. Which is the one where you barf up everything?” asked Danielle as I set my lunch bag on our usual table.

“Bulimic,” I said and straddled the lunch bench.

“Yes, that’s it. Because you collapsed last night,” said Danielle as she crunched on a taco.

“Excuse me?” I fired as I sat down my can of Coke. “Why would she do that?”

“Uh, because she hates you? Duh!”

“She needs to get over it. It’s not like I’m cheating with Dillon behind her back. She saw Chaz, she knows I have a boyfriend.” I reached into my lunch bag for my sandwich. It was unusually quiet in the lunch room today. Cyndi Lauper’s
True Colors
softly filled the room and there was a low hum of conversation. The afternoon rain knocked against the tall floor to ceiling windows and put everyone in a somber mood.

“Jealousy does strange things to people.”

“Why would she be jealous of me?” I took a bite of my sandwich.

“Well,” she began. “Could it be because her boyfriend pants after you like a lovesick puppy dog?”

“He does not.”

I looked over to the table where Sloane and Dillon were sitting. She was chatting with her stuck-up friends and he was sitting next to her, one hand playfully twisting her long hair down her back, the other hand cupping a green apple on the table. He turned and caught my gaze. I quickly turned away.

“He does too. It’s driving him crazy that you’re not mooning after him anymore,” she grabbed my Coke and took a sip.

“Not even, that’s ridiculous,” I said and took my soda back.

“Fuckin’ A. Donny told me so.”

“Oh my God!” I gasped but part of me secretly delighted that Dillon was getting a taste of his own medicine and the other part of me chastised myself for even thinking this way.

“Chaz can’t know about this, he’ll freak.”

“You think he doesn’t already know? Believe me, he knows,” she nodded.

“This is all I need right now.”

“Trouble in almost paradise?” she smirked.

“Dillon and Sloane are the least of my problems.” I told Danielle about how I always felt so overwhelmed with Chaz after sex. He was an incredible lover and he always pleased me before himself but sometimes it was too intense.
And I always felt terribly lonely after.

“That makes no sense. How could it be too intense?”

I glanced around the room. Dillon rose from Sloane’s table and joined some football players at another table. A couple of girls lingered behind my back to talk to their friends at the table behind me.

“No one’s listening, Paige, relax.”

“Not just intense,” I continued, “but…sometimes I feel so disconnected because I can’t see him.”

“What do you mean you can’t see him?” asked Danielle. She stabbed into a tater tot with a plastic fork and squeezed ketchup onto the tip.

“With the exception of one time, he only, uh… finishes, when he’s behind me.”

“He only comes doggie style?”

“Danielle, really?”
Why did she have to be so blunt?
I put my half-eaten sandwich back into the bag. I’d lost my appetite.

“Hmm,” she said, narrowing her eyes. “That’s pretty kinky. I underestimated him.” She popped another tater tot into her mouth. “So what’s the problem? Doggie style is the best position for the female orgasm. I read it in
Cosmo
.”

I set my face in my hands.

“You’re so uptight, Paige. It’s just sex.”

“I always feel weird after. Why won’t he just stay on top?”

“Have you asked him?”

“No,” I blushed. I had a hard enough time talking about it with Danielle.

“I can’t talk to him…about…that.” Could I? He had been pretty open and honest up until this point.

“If you can’t talk about fucking then maybe you shouldn’t be fucking,” she said matter-of-factly.

I squeezed my eyes and shook my head. Danielle was killing me.

“What about bj’s?” she asked.

“Come again?”

“Exactly. Have you ever given him one?”

“Gross, no. I don’t do that.” It wasn’t
entirely
the truth.

“Everybody does it.”

I had tried with Brit. I had held him in my hand, hesitating, hovering over and stared at
it
for like five minutes. He had tried to push my head down and I’d rolled off him in disgust.

“You don’t mind receiving them.”

She had me there. “True, but he hasn’t asked me to…uh…”

“Reciprocate?”

“Yes.”

“He’s not going to. You will have to initiate, if you know what I mean. If you want a deeper connection, that’s what will do it. And there’s nothing guys like better, believe me.”

“Ugh! I wouldn’t even know what to do.”

“It can be a big turn on. It’s easy. Pretend you’re licking a popsicle. A large throbbing popsicle. A mansicle.” She tossed her head back and giggled, her dark curls bouncing on her shoulders.

I glanced up at the clock, the bell was about to ring. I looked over to Dillon. He was still sitting with the football players in a sea of red and black letterman jackets. This was so typical. When I loved him he wouldn’t commit and now that I was with Chaz he wanted me back?

Before sixth period Danielle and I caught up with Dillon at his locker. Danielle decided we needed an ambush. Sloane was standing with him. Her doll eyes narrowed into small slits as she saw us approaching.

“Hi Paige,” she said with a huge fake smile. “How are you feeling today? Better?”

“Actually, I’m feeling worse.”

“Maybe it’s because you’re bulimic,” Danielle chuckled and kept walking.

Sloane’s eyes widened.

“What in the hell are you talking about, Paige?” barked Dillon.

“Dillon, can I see you in the library?” It was where we used to go and talk, back when I still loved him.

“Sure.”

“Excuse us,” I said and pried him away from Sloane’s claws.

“Was that a cat fight I just saw?”

“Meow.” I slipped my arm through his. I tossed my Gee Your Hair Smells Terrific hair and smiled sweetly at Sloane over my shoulder. She pouted and stormed off. This was too easy.

Dillon stopped in front of the library and opened the door for me. We walked past tables of kids, some studying or doing homework, some goofing off. I couldn’t help but notice the gawks and glances Dillon received from the girls.
Had Chaz commanded a room like this when he was in high school?
He strutted past them, shamelessly aware of his appeal. I looked for an empty aisle in the fiction section and he followed.

It felt strange to be back here with him. All kinds of memories flashed through my mind, some good, most of them bad. I looked up into his dark eyes, a small curious smile played on his sensual lips.
Lips I had kissed.
Danielle was right. I should have slept with him. Maybe it would have been awful and that would have been the end of it. I would have gotten him out of my system for good.

He raked his hands through his tousled hair and leaned his tall frame against the bookshelf. “Sometime today, Paige. I’ve got a yearbook meeting.”

“Your girlfriend is spreading rumors about me.”

“Sloane?”

“You have others?”

“She’s not my girlfriend.”

“She thinks she is.”

“Whatever.” The corners of his mouth turned up in a smooth grin.

I selected a book from the shelf.
Pride and Prejudice.
Fantastic. “She’s telling everyone I’m bulimic because of what she saw at practice last night.”

He pulled his eyes into a squint. “So what do you want me to do about it?”

“Tell her to stop.”

“Why don’t you tell her yourself?” he said, leaning in closer.

“She won’t listen to me. She’ll definitely listen to you,” I smirked. I could sympathize with what she was going through. I would have run into oncoming traffic for him a couple of months ago.

“Fine. Is that it? You dragged me all the way down here for that?”

“No. There’s more.”

“Oh, Jesus,” he groaned. “What else?”

I didn’t know how to begin. I didn’t know how to tell him to forget about me, that we never were and never would be. Why was this so hard?

“Paige,” he said firmly and stepped toward me. He took the book from me and scanned the cover. “Ugh, Jane Austen.” He shoved it back onto the shelf as I argued with myself.

I couldn’t do it. I chickened out.

“I don’t want you to bring Sloane to any more practices.”

“Fine.” He slipped his arm around my shoulder.

I stepped back. “Fine?”

Someone in the next aisle over shushed us. He drew me in closer. “Yes, if that’s you want.”

That was too easy. I thought he was going to fight me on this one, tell me he could bring whomever he wanted to practice. Tell me it was because I was jealous, blah, blah, blah. But no. I got a “fine.” Why did I feel like I was caught in his web and he was about to devour me?

He reached out to my cheek and slowly pushed the hair back from my face. My face felt like it was on fire and I couldn’t help but turn my cheek into the comfort of his cool palm. He exhaled slowly. “Are we done here?”

“Yes.”

He didn’t let me go and I didn’t pull away. I froze in his embrace. He pressed his fingers into my back. I knew this was taking a turn in a direction I didn’t want to go but I couldn’t stop it. He buried his face in my neck and my heart quickened. I felt like a bubble was swelling around us and we were trapped inside, no air, no room to escape.

“Are you really serious with Chaz?” he whispered. “Or are you trying to forget me?” His lips were inches from mine and it took everything I had not to kiss them. “Is it working?” he murmured, our lips almost touching.

Pull away, Paige!
Why wasn’t I pulling away?

His lips brushed over to my ear. “Are you fucking him?”

“That’s none of your business,” I whispered.

It wasn’t a no and we both knew it. What was I doing? Someone might see us. I had to stop this. I knew that what I was about to say would hurt him terribly.

“I love him, Dillon.”

The bubble burst. Dillon jerked back away from me as if I had kicked him, his eyes wide. He scowled down to me and it took me a moment to realize it was a look of disgust on his face.

“You’re a fucking idiot.”

“Excuse me?”

“Don’t come crying to me when this all blows up in your face.” He turned and walked back down the aisle. I wanted to throw every book from the shelf at him.

“Dillon!”

He didn’t look back.

As if my day couldn’t get any worse my umbrella broke and Sloane was waiting for me at my car. “If you think I’m going to stand by and watch you flirt with Dillon…” I brushed past her and attempted to unlock my car with slippery wet hands while trying to hold onto my books. She shielded herself with a black umbrella, her long hair peeking out from under the hood of her gray sweatshirt. She looked like a little boy. “You will not come between us. I won’t allow it.”

She won’t allow it? She was totally mental. 
“Sloane, could you go be crazy somewhere else, please?” I finally got the car door open and tossed my wet books onto the passenger seat.

“He’s mine, Paige.”

“Sloane, he’s not yours. He’s not anything.” I slipped into the seat and slammed the car door. Sloane stormed off but not before pounding the hood of my car with her umbrella.