The Cowboy Way (13 page)

That was the best medicine, as far as Jake was concerned.

But when the lunch bell rang, he was grateful. Finally, he could take the weight off his leg. He looked for Beth, but Trot called him over to his picnic table.

“Could that cheeseburger be any bigger?” Jake asked, sitting down with a thankful sigh.

“It's Cookie's Ramrod Special. It's about three pounds of raw meat cooked enough to hold it together.
Then he tops it with a pound of raw onions, a brick of cheese and a bottle of ketchup. He puts it between two loaves of Italian bread and hands it to you on a flimsy paper plate.”

“The infirmary is going to be crowded after this meal,” Jake quipped.

Trot suddenly became serious. “The hospital called me with the results of your X rays. You want the good news or the bad news first?”

“Give me the good news.”

“Let's talk leg first. Your tib-fib fracture isn't healing right. You have a non-union going, but it can be fixed. You'll also be able to tell the weather with it from then on. There's going to be a lot of rehab, but it'll be okay.”

“And the bad?”

“It's your back. You have a compression fracture of the lumbar spine. I'm worried about more injury to your back if you keep riding. I could give you the medical jargon, but to make it short, your back's a mess. It can be fixed with a fusion and a plug from your hip, but you won't have the flexibility you once had.”

Trot's eyes locked with Jake's, and Jake knew what his friend was going to say. He held his breath.
Please don't say it.

“Partner, my advice to you would be to retire from bull riding. It's too risky.”

Damn.
“Even after the operations?”

“Yes. Too risky.”

“What if I don't have the operations, Trot?”

“You'll be in constant pain with your back, and paralysis is always a possibility, though numbness would
precede the paralysis. You'll continue to limp like you do now, and the pain will increase because you're throwing off your posture—that's going to hurt your back even more.”

“But you can fix me up? And I could ride again, although it would be risky?”

“I'm good,” Trot said, shaking his head, “but I don't want my good work wasted. Think about it, Jake. If you want to talk further, you know where to find me.”

“Right here. It's going to take you a week to eat the Ramrod Special.”

Trot nodded and took a big bite out of the burger. “Now get lost and go eat with someone prettier than me, like that little gal over there that can't keep her eyes off you. Or maybe it's me she's looking at.”

“Not every woman is after you, Trot.”

“What do you mean? I was just named ‘Catch of the Year' by
Rodeo Wrangler Magazine.”
He took a long draw on a can of root beer.

“She's Kevin's mother, Beth Conroy.”

“I know. I'd like to talk to her, too.”

“Can I ask why?”

“About Kevin.”

Jake felt a hot rush of panic shoot through his chest. “Kevin's okay, isn't he, Trot? Tell me that the kid's okay.”

Trot put his monster of a sandwich down and blotted his hands and mouth with a paper napkin. “That's what has me crazy. Kevin seems perfectly okay. I examined him and read his folder from cover to cover. I even called the surgeon who did his last operation. There is no reason why Kevin isn't up and out of that wheelchair and running around Wyoming.”

“Damn.” Jake thought for a moment. “There must be something that you all overlooked. In case you haven't noticed, the kid is still on wheels.”

“I don't get it, either. My guess is that it's something psychological. Maybe I'll call my pal Jesse Goodwin. He's a child psychologist. I'll see if he wants to come up for a Ramrod Special in exchange for a little one-on-one with Kevin. Okay with you?”

“If it's okay with Beth.” Jake stood up slowly, feeling every ache and pain. He clamped a hand on Trot's shoulder. “Thanks.”

“Don't mention it. We'll talk more.”

Trot's concentration returned to his lunch.

Jake suddenly lost his appetite.

 

After lunch, there were a couple hours of rest and relaxation. Trot and staff passed out meds. Some of the kids actually nodded off in their tents. Some listened to their headphones, some read, most of them talked and joked in groups.

Jake lay along the bank of the river, his hat over his eyes, the sweet, warm breeze drifting over him. The rush of the water calmed him, lulled him into a state of tranquility.

He sensed when Beth approached. He could smell her scent—a scent that was uniquely her own, a mix of sunshine and musky roses.

She sat down next to him but didn't speak, seeming content to just be at this pretty spot. He might have dozed off—he didn't know—but when he woke up, she was still there, staring at the glistening river.

“Hi. Have a nice nap?” she said quietly.

“Hmm…how long was I out?”

“An hour or so.”

“I'd better get moving. It's swim time and all volunteers are needed.”

“That means me, too,” she added.

He stretched, trying to wake up his muscles along with his brain.

“Jake, I saw you talking with Dr. Trotter. Did he have any news about your X rays?” Her eyes showed concern.

Jake didn't want to talk about it, didn't even want to think about giving up his career. Besides, he had a bounty bull to ride for Wheelchair Rodeo.

“Trot and I were talking about Kevin.” It was half the truth.

Her eyes grew wide in alarm.

“No. No. Nothing's wrong. Like you, he can't understand why Kevin isn't walking. He has a friend who's a child psychologist. He was going to ask him to talk to Kevin, but only if that's okay with you.”

Her face lit up. “I was thinking of something like that myself, but…well…”

“Don't worry about the cost. Trot feels he can lure this special shrink here in exchange for Cookie's cooking.”

“Thank you,” she whispered, then her voice gained strength. “But I can pay for it. I can pay in installments depending on the cost, and—”

“Whoa! It's part of the program. I've been thinking that we need a psychologist on staff from now on.” Actually, he had never thought of it, but it did seem like a good idea for both kids and caretakers alike. “So it'll be free of charge.”

“No. I couldn't.”

He took a deep breath. “Can't you just let someone help you?”

She stared at him as if he were speaking a foreign language. “I've always done everything by myself.”

“Well, now this is one thing you don't have to do by yourself. Can you handle that?”

“I'll try,” she said, a twinkle in her eye. “Funny, I remember calling you an amateur cowboy-psychologist once.”

“I remember. It was when I told you to give Kevin some space.” He tried to get up but his leg was numb. Boy, this was getting old. He was a pitiful wreck. “You listened to me. You gave him some space.”

“And Kevin's doing fine. He's made a lot of new friends, and he has an autograph book full of signatures. He has gone through five disposable cameras and has enough memories for a lifetime.”

“And what about his mother?”

“I didn't collect any autographs, and I didn't take any pictures, but I'll enjoy Kevin's. I've met several people that I'll keep in contact with when I get back home.” She met his eyes. “And I have memories that I'll never forget.”

He took her hand and gave it a squeeze.

 

Emily and Dex Dixon were trying to talk Kevin into finishing the fourth grade before he quit to work at the Gold Buckle Ranch.

“There's a lot to running a ranch, Kevin. It's hard work, and you have to have a lot of smarts up here—” Dex Dixon pointed to his temple. “We use computers now to keep records of the cattle and horses. When it's breeding time, we keep track of—ugh!”

Emily jabbed him in the ribs with her elbow before he mentioned animals being in heat.

“We'd love for you to work for us, Kevin,” Em said. “But you need a high school diploma at least. Some of our full-time help even have college degrees.”

At the sound of distant laughter, all three turned to see Jake and Beth walking toward them holding hands.

Kevin said the one word that they were all thinking: “Wow!”

Emily tried to be casual, but Dex saw right through her. It wasn't as if Jake held hands with a pretty woman every day—at least, not around them.

“So you just go to college, Kevin,” Em said.

Kevin pointed to Jake. “But Jake's the best cowboy in the world, and he didn't go to college. Isn't that right, Jake? And Jake's a zillionaire!”

Jake looked at his father for help. “I think I missed the beginning of this movie.”

“Kevin was just telling us that he wants to quit school and work for the Gold Buckle,” Dex said. “We were telling him that he needs a college degree.”

Jake nodded, getting the drift. “We have high standards at the GBR. After you go to college, we'll talk.”

“But that's so far away! And
you
didn't go to college. Your official Web site said that you left for the rodeo trail after high school. That's really cool. You are the coolest.”

“My brother is cooler. He's going to be a veterinarian—an animal doctor. He knows a lot about ranching, too. My other brother Cody is way cooler than I am, too. He plays a mean guitar and goes to college in Texas. My sister is at UNLV right now.”

He dropped Beth's hand to push Kevin's wheelchair.
“Cool is learning everything you can. I've always regretted not going to college.”

“Really?” Kevin looked up at him wide-eyed, soaking up every word he said.

“Really.”

“What did you want to be, Jake?”

“I wanted to be just what I am, but if I'd gone to college, I would have studied history. I enjoy reading and learning about all the people who made this country great.”

“But
you're
great, Jake. You're in the Cowboy Hall of Fame and the Rodeo Hall of Fame. I read about you all the time. You made history.”

Jake stopped dead in his tracks. It was as if a lightning bolt had hit him. He
had
made history, at least in the rodeo world. He was with the best when he was inducted. Bull riders like Donnie Gay, Lane Frost and Tuff Hedeman… All-around cowboys like Larry Mahan, Jim Shoulders and Ty Murray…

He'd never thought about it before, but yeah, he'd made history.

He'd broken long-standing records of cowboys he'd idolized as a child. He'd worked long and hard, learned his craft, studied tapes of rides and picked the brains of the best. He'd spent endless hours on the road traveling from event to event. He'd made his mark.

He was the best once. He wanted to be the best again. He wanted to win the Finals in Vegas.

“It's true, dear,” his mother said. “You have made history.”

“We've always been proud of you, son, college or not,” Dex added.

Beth squeezed his hand. “I think you should go down in the history books, not only for your bull-riding wins or because you held the record for the most ninety-point rides, but because you created Wheelchair Rodeo for kids like Kevin.”

“Yeah, Jake,” Kevin added. “You're major cool.”

A warm feeling settled over him. He was with all the people he loved the most in the world and he didn't have anything more to prove.

So why wasn't that enough for him?

“Thanks. I appreciate it,” he mumbled, feeling suddenly uncomfortable. He checked his watch. “We'd better get ready for swim time.”

They all walked slowly toward the tent area, content in one another's company.

“What guys in history do you think are cool, Jake?” Kevin asked.

“Hey, don't forget about the women who made history. Ladies like Eleanor Roosevelt, Harriet Tubman, Elizabeth Cady Stanton, Sacagawea.”

“But what
guys?
”

“Christopher Columbus, Abe Lincoln, Davy Crockett, Sitting Bull, Babe Ruth, George Custer, Jim Bowie…”

“The rock star?” Kevin asked.

Jake chuckled. “No, that's David Bowie. Jim was at the Alamo.”

“Oh.”

“Did you learn about the Alamo yet?” Jake asked.

“No.”

“See why you have to go to school?”

“Yeah,” Kevin conceded.

“Good. That's settled.” Jake rubbed his hands together. “Now, let's get changed and go swimming.”

“Cool.”

Jake thought that there were several times in life that really deserved to be classified as magnificent, and this was definitely one of those times.

Last night with Beth was another.

T
he sun was bright and high in the sky. Only a slight breeze bent the long grass on the bank of the river.

Excitement charged the air as the kids got ready to swim. They were slathered with sunscreen, belted into life jackets and assigned to groups. There were about three adults to each swimmer. One was a medical person, one was a volunteer and the third was a certified Red Cross lifeguard. Extra medical staff were all on high alert.

Beth was assigned to a young girl named Eileen who was both thrilled to be going swimming for the first time in a “real outdoor place” and scared silly. Dr. Trotter was also on her team, along with a perky California-type blond lifeguard named Cheryl “Call me Cher” O'Brien.

Cher cut an attractive figure in her red one-piece
bathing suit. Beth felt like her tropical two-piece with a skirt looked like a reject from a muumuu factory. She didn't have a speck of tan, and after seeing Cher and a couple of the women, she vowed to lose twenty pounds when she got back home.

Dr. Trotter was patient and encouraged Eileen with jokes and teasing. Soon she was splashing him and letting her legs dangle in the water.

“I've never been swimming outside before!” Eileen giggled as she coughed up some water. “It's cold!”

“Do you want to float on your back?” suggested Cher.

“Will I sink?” Eileen asked.

“Not with that life jacket on and all of us here. Want to try it?”

“Yes!”

Beth stood watch with Dr. Trotter as Cher moved Eileen carefully in the water. Frequently, Cher's eyes drifted to Dr. Trotter, who looked quite studly in his boxer-type bathing suit.

Dr. Trotter pointed to Kevin splashing Jake about thirty yards from them. “Kevin seems to be doing quite well.”

“The apartment building that I manage has an indoor pool,” Beth explained. “A physical therapist comes and gives Kevin water therapy. He's very comfortable in the water.”

“I can see that,” the doctor said, never taking his eyes off Eileen. “Did Jake mention the child psychologist that's a pal of mine? He owes me a few favors, and I'd like him to talk to Kevin. Is that okay with you?”

“Jake did mention it. It's fine with me, Dr. Trotter.
There's nothing I won't try to get Kevin out of that wheelchair.”

“That's what I thought you'd say.”

“Obviously, you think it's something psychological?”

He gave a slight nod. “That's not my area of expertise, but, in my opinion, there's no medical condition keeping Kevin in that chair. It could very well be psychological.”

“Knowing Kevin, if he could, he'd be running all over this ranch. I can't imagine what would keep him sitting in that chair if it wasn't physical, but I'd love for your friend to talk to him.”

“Good.” He looked at Cher. “Would you like me to take over now?”

“Okay.” Cher flashed brilliant white teeth and perky breasts as she bent over.

After a while, Dr. Trotter decided that Eileen was tiring and needed to sit in shallow water or lie down on a blanket on shore.

Eileen didn't want to stop. “I feel so light!” she said. “It's so good not to be sitting.”

“After you rest, you can swim again,” he promised.

Eileen chose to lie down on the blanket and not sit in her chair, so the doctor and another cowboy carried her to the blanket, where she joined a hot game of Old Maid.

There was nothing for Beth to do just yet, so she sat on a chair. Her position gave her a good view of Jake and Kevin. They were playing some kind of volleyball, and looked like they were having the time of their lives.

Why couldn't Brad have paid more attention to his
son? She knew the answer to that. His job and his drinking were more important.

Kevin had adored his father and had been grateful for any kind of attention from him. It had always broken her heart to see Kevin so wanting for his father to notice him. She had brought it up to Brad many times, and for a while he had improved, but when his drinking increased, his interest in his family decreased.

Doc Trotter pulled up a chair next to her. “Those two are inseparable, aren't they.”

“Kevin idolizes Jake. Jake has been his hero when he needed one. It's done him a world of good to actually meet Jake and be with him.”

“Kevin's done a world of good for Jake, too. So have you.”

“I don't know about that.”

“I do. You and Kevin are all he talks about.”

Beth raised an eyebrow and gave a little grunt.

The doctor laughed. “Well, other than riding bulls.”

“That's more like it.”

“He has some hard decisions to make. He's going to need some friends.”

Beth felt a lump rise to her throat. “What do you mean?”

“He'll have to tell you the rest. But I know you went with him to the hospital when he had X rays, and you have some idea as to his injuries.” Dr. Trotter winked. “So maybe you can find a way to pry things out of him and help him. He's tight-lipped about things that concern him.”

“You got the results of the X rays, didn't you.”

“Yes.”

“And?”

“And that's why I said that he has some tough decisions to make.” He stood up. “I've already said too much.” His eyes sparkled. “Darn that doctor-patient confidentiality.”

 

Dinner was what Cookie called his Chuck Wagon Extravaganza. It was basically Sloppy Joes heaped on a roll, a mountain of french fries and corn on the cob.

“Mom, the food is so good here,” Kevin said. “I'm going to miss Cookie's cooking. Do you think he could give you some pointers?”

Jake unsuccessfully tried to hide the laughter bubbling up inside him. Kevin's sideways glance at Jake gave it away that they were in cahoots.

She watched them high-five one another. They got along so perfectly.

“I think you're absolutely right, Kevin. Why, Cookie was just telling me how he makes a rattlesnake burger that's just delicious. He says it tastes just like chicken. He's going to give me the recipe.”

Kevin put his hands on his throat as the smile left his face. “You're kidding, aren't you?”

Jake nudged him. “You're not falling for that, are you?”

“Uh…no! No. No way would I fall for a lame thing like that. Rattlesnake burger! No way.”

It was Beth's turn to laugh.

She touched Kevin's cheek with the palm of her hand. When she glanced up at Jake, their gazes locked. She loved her son, but her heart ached for Jake Dixon.
The ache was so deep and unfamiliar that it humbled her with its intensity.

She didn't want him to hurt anymore. She wanted him safe and free of pain. But how was that possible? He had picked one of the most dangerous jobs in the world—one that served him up an adrenaline rush but trashed his body on a regular basis. If he kept riding bulls, he was bound to get hurt again. Maybe next time it would be permanent.

Beth didn't think she could stand to see that happen—not even for a million-dollar ride for Wheelchair Rodeo. Darn that Harvey Trumble for putting strings on his donation.

She wanted to talk to Jake about what Dr. Trotter had told him, but not in front of Kevin.

She didn't have to wait long. One of the boys from his tent motioned him over, and Kevin hurried away. Jake sat down next to her.

“The joke about Cookie teaching you how to cook was Kevin's idea,” Jake said.

She chuckled. “Why do I think you were the instigator?” Her lips formed into a tight, stern line. “Jake?”

“Uh-oh. You've got that serious look. What's up?”

“Tell me about your conversation with Dr. Trotter.”

He froze for a minute with a forkful of Sloppy Joe en route to his mouth. “Let's not talk about it now. I have to think about what he said.”

“So it's not good news?”

He shook his head. “Let's just have fun right now, Beth. It's nothing that can't wait.”

“But I'm concerned about you.”

He put his fork down. “I appreciate that, but don't
worry about me. You just have a good time on the campout.”

Beth's heart sank. “After what we've shared, I thought you'd at least open up to me about this.”

He took a deep breath. “Talking about myself is not that easy for me. I need time. I just don't want to talk about it yet, not to you, not to anyone. It's something I have to think about.”

She picked up her tray. “Okay. That's your prerogative. I shouldn't have butted into your business. But as someone said to me recently, ‘Can't you just accept help?'”

Jake reached up and touched her arm. “This is different,” he said.

“How?”

“It just is.”

She shook her head. “Jake, look at what you do for the kids and their families. Everyone here would jump off a bridge if you asked them to. Anyone here would lend you an ear if you needed one.” She gently pulled free. “And that goes double for me.

“I don't want to be your mother. I already have a son.” It took all of her strength to get up. “You know where to find me if you decide you want to talk.”

She took her tray and sat by Kathy and Marylou. She half listened to their chatter, but her gaze kept drifting back to Jake. It didn't take him long to get back to his clipboard and walk away.

She didn't feel much like eating. She wanted to be back at the Trail Boss Cabin where she could immerse herself in a good book and forget about strong, silent cowboys.

She took her two charges to the rest room. Later she watched as they primped in front of the mirrors.

“I'm going to sit next to Clint Scully at the campfire,” Marylou announced. “He's so hot!”

Kathy ran a brush through her hair. “I'm going to sit next to T.J. He's cuter than anyone here.” She turned toward Beth. “Mrs. Conroy, aren't you going to put any makeup on?”

“Can I fix your hair, Mrs. Conroy?” Marylou asked, holding up a clear plastic purse filled with cosmetics.

Beth looked at herself in the mirror. Her hair was a fright from swimming. Her face showed every blemish in the harsh fluorescent lights.

“Okay, ladies. Go for it.”

“Sit down on the bench over there, so we can reach you.”

For the next twenty minutes, Beth was painted, blotted, sprayed and fussed over. When they finally let her look at the finished project, she had to admit that the girls had talent. She looked good!

“Is that me?” Beth asked in amazement.

“That's you. You look beautiful! I'll bet Jake Dixon will fall over in his boots.”

“Jake?” Beth asked. Was it that obvious?

“He's got eyes for you, Mrs. Conroy. He's always watching you and drooling.”

“Kevin wants you to marry him. Are you going to marry him, Mrs. Conroy?”

“Hey, hang on a minute!” She tried to catch her breath. What on earth was Kevin telling everyone? “I think you're putting the cart before the horse.”

“Huh?”

“I think we'd better get to the campfire, so you ladies can join in. Okay?”

“Yeah.”

“And thanks for the help.”

“Oh, wait. One more thing,” Kathy said. “Close your eyes.”

She did as instructed, expecting a hit of perfume. Instead, she felt a brush on her cheeks.

“What's that?” Beth asked.

“Glitter.”

“Glitter? As in the stuff that…glitters?”

“Fairy green. It'll be really sparkly in the campfire light.”

“Oh.” She couldn't appear in public with green glitter on her face, but she didn't have the heart to wash their efforts off her face. “Thanks, ladies.”

“You're welcome.”

“Shall we go back to the tent and get your jackets? It'll be cool later. Maybe you should put on some sweatpants, too.”

They nodded and then talked about what they should wear and what jewelry they should put on.

Beth tried to remember if she was ever that young.

 

As she approached the campfire, one of the cowboys handed her a stick and a bag of marshmallows.

Kevin's jaw dropped when he saw her. “Mom, what did you do to your face?”

“Why, what do you mean?”

“You're all sparkly, like…uh…”

“Glitter,” Jake supplied, taking the bag of marshmal
lows from her and putting one on the end of her stick. “Just like new-fallen snow.”

“It's green.” She chuckled. “Kathy and Marylou gave me a makeover.”

Kevin scrunched up his nose. “Like, why?”

“Oh, no reason.”

“You look better without that green stuff.”

“You look beautiful,” Jake whispered in her ear.

She shivered from his warm breath on her cool skin.

“Here, sit down.” He motioned to a bench, then sat down beside her.

She passed her stick with the marshmallow to Kevin. “Never did like them.”

“Hello, everyone.” Emily and Dex moved into the circle.

There were greetings all around. Then Kevin turned his concentration to firing up his marshmallow.

Emily leaned over and said quietly, “Jake, I was just thinking that you should show Beth the hot spring. It's beautiful at night. Ghostly. The steam rises and…” She looked up at Dex and smiled.

Beth could see the happiness on her face, the glow. It was then that she noticed Emily's and Dex's hair was damp. It must be a romantic hot spring.

Jake was just about to object, when Dex handed him a flashlight. “Son, there's nothing going on that we can't keep an eye on. Go now, and show Beth the hot spring. Maybe take a little dip. I'll bet it's something that she's never seen. Besides, it'll be good for your leg and back.”

Beth felt a nervous excitement when Jake stood and held his hand out to her.

“I should have thought of it myself. Thanks, Mom… Dad.”

“Take your time,” Emily replied. “We'll keep an eye on Kevin.”