The Grace In Darkness (15 page)

I was two for two now. Two times she walked away from me and I was left to wonder why in the hell I just let her go.

W
e
’
d rehearsed this a million times, but that still didn
’
t stop the hummingbirds from swirling inside my stomach.

I waited for my cue and when I heard the click, I knew darkness had fallen on the audience. I was comforted by the fact that for those brief seconds, everyone was like me. I took my spot in the center of the room, counting my steps as I drifted into the darkness. I took position and my head dropped back.

There was a flash and I was instantly bathed in a glow of light. Everything was going as planned and it helped sooth my nerves. I could do this. I
’
d done it once before; I could do it again. I counted in my head and when I reached six, I waited for the music to start. Seven went by and then eight and the music didn
’
t come. I didn
’
t want to move out of position. I didn
’
t want the crowd to think anything was wrong.

I could hear the hushed whispers start to spread around me and I knew I couldn
’
t stand there any longer so I started to move without the music. I worried everyone could hear the sound of my heart through the silence. It was pounding so hard. And then the music started to flow from the other side of the room and I couldn
’
t stop myself from showing a reaction this time.

Everything came to a complete standstill as I listened to the familiar melody.
It can’t be him,
my mind argued. There was no way I
’
d been standing less than ten feet from him and he didn
’
t say anything to me. I felt like I was going to throw up, but my heart was lodged in my throat and I couldn
’
t do anything but stand there and stare toward where the music originated.

Ryland.

It took me a full minute to realize I
’
d fallen behind and that he
’
d looped the song three times waiting for me to catch my breath. I blinked and looked around. I knew everyone was looking at me, watching the rapid rise and fall of my chest.

The fourth loop came around, and I knew I needed to get through this. I just needed to get through this.
Breathe, Araya.
I counted to three and moved like my sanity depended on it, and in a way, it kind of did.

The familiar melody of Ryland
’
s song danced over my skin like a caress. Every kiss, every touch came back to me in a teasing rush. My legs trembled at the memories, and I thought my knees were going to give out. The feeling was so intense.

I
’
d been going through the motions of the dance without needing to put much thought into it, and I
’
d completely forgotten about Peirce. Suddenly, I was swept into his arms and his face was a breath away from mine. He was holding me closer than he had in rehearsals.

“
Breathe, Araya,
”
he whispered, and it touched my lips.
“
You
’
re doing amazing.
”

He pulled me tighter against him, fitting our bodies together in one line. The music tripped over its own notes, and I tensed in Peirce
’
s arms.

“
Just go with it,
”
he whispered, not realizing he was the reason it happened at all.

He spun me out, holding me at arm
’
s reach, and then tucked me into his arms again. It was my song Ryland was playing, but then again, it wasn
’
t. It was angry, sad, raw. It tore at my heart, and all I wanted to do was go to him and beg him to forgive me, take me back, and never let me go.

It felt like our performance went on forever rather than the two minutes it actually lasted. I both welcomed and dreaded the ending. I wished I
’
d never let Violet and Pierce talk me into it, but never in a million years did I think I would be performing in front of Ryland.

Pierce spun me and lifted me against him. My head fell back and I felt his lips against my chest. I was sure he could feel my heart pounding, and I didn
’
t want him to get the wrong idea. The music ended abruptly and I panicked. Pierce
’
s lips dragged up my neck. They were supposed to stop against mine, but I tensed in his arms and he didn
’
t go any farther. My chest burst with relief as we finished the routine. I bent my back over his arm and he followed, molding against my chest, and then the lights went out.

“
Are you okay?
”
Pierce asked, pulling me back up.

“
Yes.
”
It wasn
’
t as convincing as I wanted it to be, but I couldn
’
t help the slight shake in my voice.

“
It
’
s almost over,
”
he said, not realizing my fear wasn
’
t from the crowd around us, but from only one person.

We stood side by side and were hit with that bright light again as everyone broke out in applause. It was almost deafening as it echoed off the walls. It made my ears ring. I had no idea where Ryland was or if he was even still around. He
’
d stopped playing before the performance was over.

Pierce bowed, pulling me with him, and I let him take control while I gathered myself. I felt like the walls were closing in on me. My darkness suffocated me and I felt like clawing at my own skin to get free, but there was no escaping this prison.

“
Were these two not absolutely amazing?
”
I recognized Mr. Vincent
’
s voice over the speakers.
“
Please give Araya Noelle and Pierce Montgomery a special round of applause.
”

The crowd cheered louder. I listened to Mark Vincent explain to everyone who Pierce and I were and how he was donating over fifty thousand dollars to the prestigious Madison Academy, School for the Blind.

As soon as Mark was done with his introductions, I slipped free from Pierce
’
s hand.

“
Araya?
”
I heard Pierce call after me, but I didn
’
t stop moving.

I shifted through the bodies and pushed my way through the crowd. People congratulated me as I passed them, telling me how amazing I did and how brave I was.

When I shoved through the doors that led to my getaway, I gasped for breath. It was far from over, though.

I knew it was coming.
When
it was coming was a whole different story. I didn
’
t know where I was going, but I rushed down the hall, feeling against the wall as I went. I kept glancing behind me as if I expected an image to suddenly appear, but only darkness stalked me.

When I got to the sharp edge of a corner, I turned, pressing myself against the wall. I took a deep breath and my eyes closed. I breathed in deeply again and I could smell him, but I didn
’
t expect it, and I choked on my next breath. His body was warm and hard as it pressed against mine. His finger pressed against my lips before I could utter a sound.

Spinning me in his arms, he pulled me against his front and his arm was around my waist, fitting our hips together. His breath teased the sensitive skin at my ear and a bolt of currents ran down my spine.

He moved so quick I didn
’
t even realize he
’
d done it until I felt my hair spilling down my back and over my shoulder. Slowly, his hand moved up my arm and behind my shoulders, pulling all my hair to the side. A whimper trembled free when I felt his lips move across my heated skin.

It
’
d been so long since I
’
d felt him against me, touching me, and my body responded without any help from me. I molded against him and he growled into my neck. The edges of his teeth bruised my skin, but I wanted it. I wanted him. He twisted me around again, pushing me into the wall with his body, and his hands and mouth were all over me at once. He pulled and tugged at my dress until the fragile fabric submitted to him, revealing the curve of my breast to his greedy lips. I only half cared that we were in the hallway in plain sight where anyone could see us.

All of a sudden, Pierce
’
s voice echoed off the smooth walls, calling for me. I froze, pushing at Ryland, but he didn
’
t budge or wouldn
’
t. He lifted his head and then he was pulling me to the side and we were drowned in darkness.

“
C
ome here,
”
I growled, and when she didn
’
t move, I taunted.
“
Come on, Hummingbird, I dare you.
”

She took a deep breath and a step toward me, and it was over.
Colliding into each other, we fell against the wall in the small room. My mouth came down on hers fiercely, and my fingers flexed around her ribs. I lifted her against me, and her shapely legs wrapped around my waist easily. My hands moved over her hips, and my fingers dug into her flesh, bringing her closer and harder against me. I needed her to know exactly how good this was going to be.

I
’
d waited so damn long to feel her like this again, and I didn
’
t want to wait a fucking second longer. Dropping one of her legs, I lifted the other higher around my waist.

“
Tell me you want me, Araya,
”
I demanded against her mouth and bit her lip.

My fingers moved over the top of her thigh and the silkiness of her skin until they traced the edge of her panties. She moaned and her mouth lifted toward me.

“
I want you, Ryland. I never stopped wanting you.
”

“
Fuck,
”
I hissed and pushed my fingers inside her.

She cried out, her fingers dug into my shoulders, and her head fell back. My mouth opened over her neck and I pushed harder. Her hips kept in rhythm with my fingers and her reaction was enough to make me lose it without needing to be inside her.

But I needed to feel her around me more than I needed to breathe, and that was the only thing that kept me from letting her finish.

“
Not yet,
”
I told her, pulling away so I could undo my pants.

My lips found hers in the dark and I pushed my tongue past them and deep into her mouth. Her fingers moved through my hair, pulling and tugging at me. She was so different than the girl I
’
d met just months ago. She was confident, sure of herself, and it was the sexiest thing in the world.

Lifting her leg again, I pushed myself into her—slowly at first because she was so damn tight and I didn
’
t want to hurt her. But she started moving her hips against me and I couldn
’
t focus past the thought of burying myself deep inside her. I held her hips and pushed harder. She bit her lip to keep from screaming and clung to me, trembling.

I stood there holding Araya pressed against the wall, and every breath she took made me move inside her, and I was so tempted to take her again and again and again. But I knew it was only a matter of time before more people came to look for her.

I bit back a groan as I pulled out and let her legs drop to the floor. I didn
’
t let her go until she was able to stand on her own and then I took a step back before I could do anything stupid.

“
Are you okay? Was I too…? Did I hurt you?
”

I started to fix my pants and she pushed her dress down in place. She had yet to look up at me. I took a step toward her, but she still didn
’
t look up.

“
Araya, look at me.
”

She took a breath and looked up. God, she was beautiful.

“
Did I hurt you?
”

She shook her head and then whispered,
“
No, you didn
’
t hurt me.
”

“
I couldn
’
t control myself.
”
It wasn
’
t an apology because I wasn
’
t sorry for what we did.

“
I
’
m not complaining,
”
she said softly.
“
How
’
d you know I
’
d be here?

“
I didn
’
t know. I
’
m here because my… I
’
m here for a work thing.
”
I didn
’
t want her knowing I worked with J.D.

“
Were you backstage? Was that you?
”

“
Yes.
”

“
Why didn
’
t you say anything? Why didn
’
t you tell me or talk to me? You just sat there not saying anything.
”

Her voice had gotten higher by the end of her sentence, and she was angry… which in turn made me angry.

“
What did you want me to say, Araya?
”
Her name sounded foreign and bitter on my tongue.
“
It
’
s not like I could-
”

I ran my fingers through my hair, frustrated. This wasn
’
t going how I wanted it to.

“
It
’
s not like you could do what, Ryland?
”
she demanded.

I pulled her against me.
“
This!
”

My lips crashed onto hers and I pushed them open with my tongue. My fist wrapped around a handful of her hair and I held her to me. I couldn
’
t get enough of her. I wanted more. I was always left wanting more.

“
And this.
”
My lips moved down her neck, biting at her skin softly. She let out little growls, her fingers moving through my hair, tugging on me.
“
Or this.
”

I pulled down the strap of her dress. She wasn
’
t wearing anything underneath and I covered her breast with my hand and dragged my thumb over her nipple. She let out a small cry and her back arched.

“
Ryland.
”
She moaned.

“
I
’
ve missed the way your body sings for me, Hummingbird.
”

I bent over, taking her nipple between my lips and sucking it into my mouth. She moaned and pressed into me. I bit gently, pulling and tugging until she was squirming against me. There was nothing I wanted more than to pull her down on top of me and lose myself in her.

“
Tell me, Hummingbird,
”
I rasped against her skin.
“
Tell me how I was supposed to do this in front of your boyfriend.
”

She shoved at me hard. I didn
’
t expect her reaction and that made it easy for her to push me away. I fell back, feeling dazed and dizzy. She pulled her dress back up and breathed hard. Her face was red and her hair fell in messy waves down her back, and I realized she was angry, but she looked sexy as hell.

“
My boyfriend?
”
she hissed.
“
What are you talking about? Who?
”

“
That guy you were dancing with.
”

“
Peirce? Peirce isn
’
t my boyfriend. I dance with him. He
’
s my partner.
”

“
He looked like a lot more than that to me.
”

Her eyes narrowed at me.
“
Well, you
’
re wrong. How could you think he was my boyfriend after everything we…? You think I would
’
ve just had...?
”
She waved her hand back and forth between us.
“
I thought you knew me better than that, Ryland.
”

“
I haven
’
t seen you in months! You told me not to wait for you, so what was I supposed to think?
”

“
You were supposed to know that I love you and I left because I needed to do it for me. How dare you punish me for that!
”

She found the door handle before I could stop her and she walked out. I was right behind her, running into her back right outside the door.

“
Araya... there you are.
”
He looked at me critically.

“
Peirce... I,,,
”

“
I
’
m Ryland.
”
I held my hand out around one side of Araya.

“
I
’
m sorry. Pierce, this is Ryland. Ryland, Pierce.
”

“
Nice to meet you, Ryland.
”
He gripped my hand in a way that said it wasn
’
t nice to meet me at all.
“
I didn
’
t realize you two knew each other.
”

“
I knew Ryland before MA.
”

“
Oh... in the back... you didn
’
t say anything to Araya.
”

“
I was surprised to see her,
”
I said dryly. He looked behind me into the closet and then back at me.
“
Well, it looks like… I
’
m sorry, what was your name again?
”

He smirked.
“
Pierce.
”

“
Right. Looks like she
’
s in good hands. It was nice to see you again, Araya.
”

She didn
’
t say anything as I moved from behind, but I could feel her eyes staring into my back as I walked away from her.