The Heart's Ashes (49 page)

Another pair
of cool arms came up from behind. “I want to hear a happy song,”
Emily trilled. “Can you teach me to play something
Christmassy?”

“
Sure.” I shuffled over and Mike moved off the stool, landing
on the couch. “Okay, place your pinkie on the C, your middle finger
on the E, and your thumb on the G.”

Emily sat
still, frozen almost, with her hands in her lap, her eyes on the
keys.

“
Em? What is it?”

“
She’s listening,” Mike noted, sitting forward.

“
To what?”

“
David,” he stated.

“
What do you mean?”

“
I can hear him.” She shook off her trance then and smiled at
me, her eyes dark and round.

“
Hear him?” I wanted to jump up and stomp my feet. “Hear his
thoughts?”

“
Kind of,” she said, sinking one shoulder.

Oh, hell-to-the-no! This is caps-lock, exclamation-level
unfair
. “I—H...How?”

“
It’s not like I can hear his actual thoughts, but, sometimes,
I can like,
feel
them.”

“
What the hell? Emily, what do you mean?”

“
It’s—” she looked to Mike, awkward. “It’s like I can tell
what he’s thinking, from what he’s feeling.”

My mouth hung
open, dry. I snapped it shut. “Well, what...what’s he feeling
now?”

Emily, with
lips pressed into a fine line, looked at Mike again. “Let’s just
play a song.”

“
No. Em, please?” I grabbed her arm. “What’s wrong with
him?”

“
Nothing.” She shrugged, then smiled to herself. “He’s
just—suffering.”

“
What? Suffering?” I jumped up. “Where is he?”

“
Not like that, Ara. He’s okay. He’s just feeling—” She
laughed then and looked away.

“
What?”

“
Never mind. Just leave him be.” She grabbed my hand as I
edged away. “Just leave him alone—trust me.”

Mike stood up
and walked toward my room.

“
Well, how come
he
can go?”

“’
Cause he’s a guy—it’s a guy thing.”

A guy thing?
“Is this about
sex?”

“
Sex?” Emily doubled back. “No. Nothing to do with it,
why?”

“
Then why is he suffering?”

“
Ara, just shut up and teach me a song.” She rolled her eyes,
placing her fingers on the keys. “He’s fine. I promise.”

By the glow of
a candle, with the gentle twinkling of Christmas lights reflecting
off the bay window, I sat looking out at the blackness that was the
frozen lake in the daylight, absently tracing a nail over the
frosted glass chessboard in front of me. When a pair of intense
green eyes stole my gaze from my own reflection, I looked up and
smiled at my vampire, moving my foot off the opposite chair so he
could sit down.

“
I have something for you,” he said.

“
But you already gave me my Christmas present.” I clutched the
silver locket—the one I opened early this morning, when David woke
me from a restful dream and placed a small green box with a red bow
in my hands.

The locket is
back where it belongs now, safely against my chest.

David held
back a mischievous smile. “It’s something else—something that’s
been missing from your life for too long.” He lifted his hand from
his pocket, and something clinked on the glass board in front of
me. “It’s time this found its way home again.”

There, among
the white and black pieces to a game of strategy, sat the
knight—the black knight that was lost before the box had been
opened.

“
You? This was from you?” My eyes widened; I picked up the
small, wooden piece.

“
It was a message.” David’s eyes focused on my fingers as I
twirled the knight around.

“
A message? That
you
were missing?” I asked.

He nodded.

“
But it’s wrong, David—that’s not what’s been missing.” I put
the knight down. “You’re not a piece in a game—you’re everything,
you’re the whole world. That’s what’s been missing—not some
cheaply-carved, wooden representation.”

“
It was a metaphor.”

“
It was poor one. Especially since, if you were a chess piece,
you wouldn’t be the black knight.”

“
Then, which piece am I?” he asked leadingly.

“
Maybe you’re not a piece at all?”

“
If you had to choose?” He grinned, his eyes
glistening.

I shook my
head, looking at the board. “The king,” I said, and picked it
up.

“
Why the white king?” He took it from my hand and studied it.
“I’m a vampire—a killer. I’m not good, Ara.”

“
You have a good heart, David, full of integrity. And it’s
moral strength that makes a king good or bad, not the deaths that
occur at his hands.”

“
So, now I’m moral, am I?” he asked in a light tone, resting
the king back on the board.

“
You always were. You just didn’t know it.”

“
Hm,” he mused, “you don’t know me very well,
then.”

“
I know you better than you might think.”

“
To make that statement shows how little you know.” He stood
half way, remaining a little crouched as he dragged the chair to
sit closer to me. “I like that you think kindly of me, though—it
makes me feel like less of a monster.”

“
Do you really believe that? That you’re a
monster?”

“
There’s no belief or opinion. I am what I am.” He took my
hand. “I never wanted you to learn of the things I’ve done, Ara,
but when we go to Paris, you will hear things, and I—”

“
David.” I sat on the edge of my chair, tilting my neck up a
little to lift his gaze with my eyes. “I don’t care what you’ve
done. Really. You could’ve been a
lawyer
in the past and I wouldn’t
hold it against you.” I chuckled once; David didn’t, though, he
only scratched his head, narrowing one eye.

“
What?” I sat back. “Was my joke that bad?”

“
Ara, I am a lawyer.”

I burst out
laughing, failing to cover my mouth before the gust of air escaped.
“I forgot about that.”

“
How did you know?”

“
Eric told me.”

David’s smile
twitched under his tight lips as I rolled back in my chair and
clutched my contracting stomach.

“
So you love me still?”

As my cackling
settled to breathy hiccups, I shook my head. “I love you to pieces,
David—even if you’re a blood-hungry lawyer.”

“
Good.” He grabbed my hand and squeezed it tight, as if he
owned it. I liked that. “Because you will hear things you won’t
like. So just remember that, okay? Just remember that you love
me—no matter what.”

“
Okay.” I nodded, breathing out the humour. “No matter what.
And you love me—no matter what, right?”

“
Always,” he said with surety.

“
What if I changed a child?”
Why did
you just say that, you moron!

David dropped my hand; his expression blackened. “What
do
you
know about
that?”

“
Only that it’s against the law.” I shrugged; his reaction
said
do not elaborate or Eric may lose a
limb.

“
How
do you know about
that?”

“
You should know—didn’t you read everything in my mind that
happened while you were away?”

“
Eric told you?”

“
Yes. Didn’t you see the conversation?”

“
No.”

Thank God.
Eric’s safe for another day.

He leaned back
in his chair, his face awash with thought. “I wish I’d paid closer
attention now.”

“
Oh, well,” I said casually, “Eric just told me that there
were vampires who were children.”

“
And that’s all he told you?”

I nodded; it
wasn’t convincing, but I think even David wanted to avoid the
truth.

“
Ara?” He leaned forward, his eyes flooding black; only tiny
circles of green remained around the pupils. “Never, ever change a
child. I don’t care what your reasons are—don’t ever do it. Do you
understand?”

“
Okay.” I nodded. “You know I wouldn’t do that, though,
right?”

“
I hope not. There is nothing that haunts me more than the
memory of those children.” He stared blankly. “I would give any
part of myself to find them a path to freedom.”

“
You care?”

“
About my own species?” He looked at me. “Always.”

“
Can they be freed?”

“
It’s an eternal argument, Ara. Some say there are ways to
teach them civility, others disagree. But I’m an advocate for their
well-being. I fund research and fight—” He cleared his throat.
“
Fought
for their
rights, using my position on the council.”

“
So, do you think they’ll ever find a way—to let them out of
the dungeons?”

David looked
at me; I knew I’d said too much about what I knew. “Yes. And any
being who would think to keep that from them is not worthy of
life.”

“
Well, what about the vampires who changed them, what happened
to
them
?”

David shot up
out of his chair and took a few deep, quiet breaths; his fists
clenched tightly by his sides. “For your own sake, girl, don’t ever
ask me that question again.”

“
Why?”

He opened his
mouth to speak, but closed it, balled his fists tighter and walked
away—stiff, from the neck down.

Whoa,
overreaction of the century. I really have to learn not to push
him. There’s so much I don’t know about his past. I wonder if he’s
right to worry if I’d still love him when I find out the horrors of
his inner truths.

But then, I’m
sure mine are far worse.

The bedroom
door slammed behind David and guilt kicked in like a piece of bread
stuck down my throat. I just wanted him to tell me about Pepper,
himself—about how he sentenced her after she changed a child.

A part of me
wonders if he did that because of his love for the law, his detest
for the fate of the Immortal Damned, or a newfound hatred for her,
when he discovered her betrayal.

But the bigger part inside me wonders what he’d do if
I
broke the law. Would I
suffer Pepper’s fate—being sentenced at his hand?

What scares me
the most is that, for all I know about David, I can’t honestly
answer that question.

Right now, I’m really looking forward to this Paris trip. It
may give me a unique opportunity to find out once and for all who
this
David Knight
really is.

If he won’t
tell me, someone will.

The fleeting
winter sunshine went on holiday, which was perfect because I wanted
nothing of the blue skies. Darkness and solitude were on the menu,
and I found them under my blanket, my body cradled by the indent in
my mattress.

“
What’s wrong, Ara?” David stood in the doorway.

I hugged my
knees to my chest, pinning the hot water bottle closer to my
tummy.

“
Oh.” He nodded, dragging out the vowel. “Well, I guess you’re
not stressed anymore.”

“
Go away!” I ditched a pillow at him. “Emily! Get the vampire
out of here.”

David
maintained his chuckle, tossing the pillow onto the floor as he
landed gently on the bed, without so much as creasing the covers.
“I’m not going anywhere, my love. You’re in pain. I’m staying until
it goes away.”

“
But I don’t want you in here. It’s embarrassing.” I rolled
over—away from him.

“
Oh, come on, Ara,” he moaned, “I’m not the first guy to know
when his girlfriend has her monthlies.”

I smiled to
myself; he can’t even say the word. “But it’s blood…and
you…y’know…”

“
It’s a very different kind of blood, my love.” He laughed. “I
don’t see it that way. Now grow up and stop being such a
baby.”

“
Baby? I’m not being a baby.”

“
Yes, you are. I bet you’ve been around Mike a hundred times
when you’ve had your period.”

Hmpf!

“
I thought so. Now—” he appeared in front of me, squatting
down, face to face, “—I’ll go make you some tea and run a bath for
you. Sound good?”

I nodded.
“That’d be nice.”

He kissed my nose and stood up. “I love you, Ara,
okay?
Especially
when you’re being human.”

Emily popped
her head in as David disappeared into my bathroom. “Everything
okay?”

“
Em.” I sat up and hugged my pillow. “Go get me some tampons.
Now! I’m so not wearing those
other
things
around a vampire.”

She laughed.
“It won’t make any difference.”

“
It will to me.”

“
Hey girls, what’s all the commotion?” Mike popped his head in
too; I shook mine at Emily.