The Last Testament: A Memoir (66 page)

Lohan, Dina, in jail switch with daughter,
109

Lohan, Lindsay, in jail switch with mother,
109

Lookinland, Mike,
348

Los Angeles Marathon,
336

Lot,
30
,
34
–35

lottery, ominous numbers in,
344

love,
321
–24

Love, Courtney, palindromic remark of,
109

Low-Class Ethnic Scum,
340
,
341

Lucas, George,
332

Lucifer,
26
,
184

Luke,
163
,
209

Luther, Martin,
276
–83

McConaughey, Matthew, vision seen by,
109

McCormick, Maureen, death of,
347

McLean, Don,
84

Madai,
61

Madison, James,
137
–38

Madoff, Bernie,
197

Madonna,
25
,
113
,
123

Magdelene, Mary,
204

magic,
185

Magog,
61

Maldives,
346

Mandela, Nelson,
111

manna,
81
–82

Manna Non-Surprise,
312

Manning, Archie, desire of both sons to be defeated,
264

Manning, Eli,
264

Manning, Peyton,
264

March Madness,
336

Marco Polo,
268

Mardi Gras, Queen Elizabeth II’s surprise appearance at,
334

marijuana,
253

Mark,
163
,
185
,
209

marketing,
274

marriage,
322
–23

Martha,
194

Marx, Karl,
290
,
303

Mary,
178
,
179

appearance after birth of Jesus,
272

Jesus’s Mother’s Day gesture towards,
340

pregnancy of,
175
–77

qualifications of,
175

Mary (Jesus’s friend),
194

Masters,
338

masturbation,
28
,
180
,
219
,
319

Mather, Cotton,
282

Matthew,
163
,
185
,
196
,
209

Matthew (apostle),
195

Mayan Long Count Calendar,
327

Mayans,
63
,
90
,
169
,
327
–29,
357

Mayflower,
137

Meat Is Murder Act,
335

Mecca,
238
,
240
,
242
,
244

Mediate, Rocco,
158

Medicis,
288

Medina,
242

Merck,
357

Meshek,
61

meteor clusters, following thee,
334
,
341
,
344
,
345
,
347
,
348
,
349
,
350
,
351
–52,
356

Methodism,
221
,
332

Mexico, border closed by,
351

Michael,
26
,
39
,
75
–76,
80
,
296

Job afflicted by,
129

Mary’s pregnancy and,
176

on Sistine Chapel ceiling,
273

Microsoft,
344

Middle Ages,
263
–70,
271
,
285

middlepope,
279

Midian,
61

Midianites,
29

Mike,
272
,
273

Mike and the Mad Dog,
158

Milne, A. A.,
255

Minnesota Twins,
157

Miracle of Extinguishing the Wildfire,
195

Miracles,
185
,
186
,
195

Mississippi, flooding of,
339

Montag, Heidi, order of,
110

Monty Python,
271

moon,
6
,
7

Moon, Keith,
293

moon landing, as missed by God,
303

Moore, Demi, professorship of,
344

Mormon Tabernacle Choir,
331

Morrison, Jim, death of,
147

Mosaic law,
84

Moses,
31
,
87
,
92
,
93
,
169

Bible dictated to,
19
–20,
87
,
88
,
89

birth of,
69

as doer,
251

God’s restraint urged by,
287

at God’s wedding,
166

Holocaust and,
102
,
103

“It” possessed by,
72

Jews led from Egyptians by,
294

as more Manson than Heston,
71

Old Testament dictated to,
6

as prophet,
126

Ten Commandments dictated to,
83

Ten Plagues sent by,
76
–78,
79

upbringing of,
70

Moss, Kate, small lunch ordered by,
110

Mothman,
146

Mozart, Wolfgang Amadeus, quick writing of,
291

MSNBC,
341

Mt. Rushmore, transformation of,
334

Muhammad,
91
,
324

cartoons of,
236

as doer,
251

Gabriel’s visit to,
238
,
239
–40

God’ restraint urged by,
287

Koran revealed to,
26

marriages of,
243

as prophet,
126
,
238

sign of Armageddon chosen by,
347

Mussolini, Benito,
63

Mutai, Geoffrey,
336

mysteries,
143
–48

Nabokov, Vladimir,
231

Nadal, Rafael, ominous defeat of,
346

Nameless,
18

Naomi,
165

Napoleon I, Emperor of the French, height of,
291

National Buttermilk Biscuit Day,
341

National Gay and Lesbian Task Force,
346

National Hurricane Center, name of hurricane chosen poorly by,
351

natural disasters,
51

Nazis,
230

Nehemiah,
117

Nelson, Willie,
343

Netherlands, crime legalized in,
343

New Orleans, La.,
55

New Testament,
186
,
291

Godlib on,
213

New York Giants,
156
–57

Nicene creed,
289

Nietzsche, Friedrich,
254
,
255
,
290

95 Theses, The,
277
–83

Ninurta,
28

Nirvana,
251

Nivian Brandallaxes,
287

Noah,
18
,
19
–21,
23
,
51
,
87
,
229
,
294

Norris, Chuck, political appointment of,
354

North Korea,
337

Norway, monsoon in,
350

Nostradamus,
330
–31

“Nukalyptus,”
352

Numa Numa Guy,
304

Numbers,
85