The Lonely Girl (2 page)

Alec
interrupts us. “Hey now, none of that, let’s get out of here.” He swats at Keegan.

I can’t keep a straight face, and I giggle. I actually giggle, even I’m surprised, but when I look at my brother, he is completely shocked. I haven’t had a real laugh in eight months. I just smile at him, and he smiles back. He puts his arms around me, and we head to Keegan’s car. Maybe this trip wasn’t such a horrible idea after all.

              ******************************************

As we pull up to the dorm, it’s exactly like all the brochures Michael and Alec were always showing me.
There are students everywhere, yet I think can I really walk around here and not feel lonely or will it be just like back home? It’s green at every angle, even with the students, it’s peaceful and the glimmer of the lake is surreal.

Keegan turns to me. “Well
, Becca, is it everything you thought it would be?” I look at him, tears almost being shed.

“Yes Keegan, it really is. I just don’t know if it’s for me.” I add a
smile, but by the way he’s staring at me, I’m not sure what I’m conveying to him.  This was my dream at one point, but can I really just come here like my life wasn’t entirely shattered eight months ago.

“
Well, let’s show you around so you can see if this is exactly the place for you.” He gives this enormous smile that’s so infectious I can’t help but smile back. During this exchange, my brother is just staring at us with his mouth wide open. He realizes he’s been caught and just shakes his head.

We all get out of the car. Alec opens the car door for me. He drove, and I’m assuming he told Keegan I only get in the car with my parents or him. He probably thinks I’m a complete nut job. The thought shocks me more than anything. Why do I care? I never care what people think about me.
Like Dillon. I don’t care if he really likes me. I picked Dillon because I knew there was absolutely no future with him. He would never be the love of my life. However, he made it appear to my parents that I was dealing with the accident and moving on. My mom is fine with Dillon, since he plays football and attends Western University, here in our hometown of London, Ontario. My dad just tolerates him for me. Alec, well he calls him an asshat, so that should tell you everything he thinks about him. Crap I never turned my phone back on. I go to grab it from my back pocket when all of a sudden, I have two pairs of arms go over my shoulder. Both my brother and Keegan direct me to the dorms.

We walk in
to the dorm, and my brother registers me with the clerk as his guest for the next five days. Well, I never really asked how long I was staying. Alec said a few days, at least, so that’s what I told Dillon. I’m happy to be spending time with my brother. I don’t see him much with him being away at school. As we approach their door, I see their sign, and it says Potts and Key’s Room. Potts is our last name. Key, hmmm, I wonder where he got that nickname? There is also a slew of names and phone numbers with call me. Seriously? Alec and Keegan see me looking at all the writing.

Keegan says, “This will be you next year, we’ll have to be batting the guys off your door.” I laugh.

My brother goes still. “No way is that happening, not with me here. No.” I see my brother getting flustered so I decide to make him sweat.

“Well then I’ll just put my number on their doors, or I’ll go to another school where you can’t spy on me
, big brother.” I peer up at him. If looks could kill, there’d be a tag on my toe right now.

Keegan just busts out laughing at our interaction. He puts his arm around me and leads me
into the room. “Go easy on him, Becca you’re going to give him a stroke and you haven’t even gotten your own dorm yet.”

Their room is small with two of everything
and off-white walls that look like they’ve had twenty coats of paint. Each of the boys has a single bed, desk, drawers and one sink for both of them. At the very back of the room is a futon which looks to be crammed in there. I look over to their beds and think how do they even fit in those? The walls have posters on them.  Keegan clearly likes rock and alternative music. My brother has some pictures and posters up. I see a picture of Michael, Alec and me from last summer. He sees me looking at it, grabs it and tucks it in his dresser.  I turn away from him. I don’t want him to see that this has affected my mood.

“I’ll go get the guys and we can head down to the cafe, how does that sounds
, Becca?” I turn to Alec again.

“Sounds great I’m hungry
anyway.” I try to put a smile on but fail miserably.

Alec turns to Keegan. “Will you stay here, I’ll go track down the guys.”

Keegan smiles. “Sure thing, bro.”

With that my brother is out the door. I walk over to the futon and sit down. I look up, and Keegan is staring at me. Oh
God, what’s he going to say? So I speak first. As I do he tries to say something.

“Sorry.” I laugh. “What were you trying to say?” I smile at him.

He just grins at me. “No you go first.”

I pause. I wasn’t going to say anything
special, but I repeat it. “So why Key?”

He looks like he’s going to be sick. “Oh, ah it’s just short for Keegan. Everyone just calls me Key.”

I don’t believe him, for some reason, but who am I to say that he’s lying. I only know what my brother says about him.

“So do you want me to call you Key then?” He goes chalk white and shakes his head.

Oh, maybe he just lets his friends call him that. I just sit there silently. I’m embarrassed.

He turns to me and tries to place a grin on his face. “I like it that you call me Keegan.”

I swear he’s blushing a little. Now I’m blushing, just lovely.

“Alright Keegan it is.”

I get up and wander around my brother’s side of the room. There are also pictures of him and me at Christmas. I know Keegan is staring at me still. I open my brother’s dresser and put the picture of us back.

“You know he worries about you? When I met him all he talked about was his amazing sister and how he wanted her to come here when she graduated.” He goes really quiet.

“I know he worries. I do want to come here I just don’t know if I can. I don’t know what he told you but the plan was for me to come with Michael. It feels so odd being here without him.”

I sigh. This is a deep conversation I really don’t want to have. So I change the subject. “You roomed together last year as well right?”
I asked even though I know the answer.

“Yes, we are getting an apartment for the next two years though, no more dorms for us.”

This I didn’t know, I guess I just assumed he’d stay in the dorm. Alec always said he’d only get a place with Michael, maybe he has a new best friend. Just then my brother opens the door with eight guys behind him. Oh great, socializing, just what I love.

Alec
takes over with introductions to which I pay little attention to until he gets all big brother on me. “This is my sister Becca, and before we get any ideas, she’s off limits boys.” He’s beaming. I, however, am so embarrassed that I am most likely the colour of a strawberry. His announcement is followed by the boys saying a collective ‘awe’. 

I
walk over to my brother now just being completely annoyed and whisper, “Guess I’ll just have to find some guys you don’t know.” He goes rigid and again, Keegan laughs, clearly overhearing our exchange.

“Don’t worry
bro, we will make sure she stays out of trouble,” Keegan said. I glare at him. Great. All I need is another big brother to embarrass me.

We walk to the
café, the guys all laughing and making jokes. When we sit at the table, my brother sits on one side of me and just as one of the other guys was coming to sit next to me Keegan slips in. Instead, the guy goes and sits across from me.

“My name’s Jacob Kelso, but everyone just calls me Jake.” He puts his hand out. When I look up and get the full sight of him, I gasp. God, is there something in the food here? He’s beautiful and not in a girl
ie way.  He has the most piercing hazel eyes. What my friends from back home would call panty droppers. He’s slim, but built, and I’d say slightly over six feet. He’s got honey brown hair that sweeps to the side, with what looks like permanent helmet head, but it’s so sexy. I’m so nervous I don’t know what to do. Making myself look very awkward I just wave and tell him my name.

“I’m Becca Potts. It’s nice to meet you Jake.”  I give a small smile and realize I’m flirting with Jake. My brother and Keegan both look at me like I’ve grown two heads.
Okay, it’s not like I never show interest in a guy. But look at him, and he just seems so sweet.

“Jake
is our starting defenseman for the Lakehead Thunderwolves.” Alec is beaming, because he loves being a Thunderwolf. I look at Jake, and he’s blushing.

“
Well, Jake I can’t wait to see you all play.” This only makes him further blush, and I giggle.

Jake and I are in deep discussion about art.
It turns out, both of us are interested in many different types of art, and it becomes common ground for us to talk about throughout dinner. Keegan jumps in and starts asking about the types of art I actually do myself. I explain to him I love to draw, paint and love to work with oils. He veers the conversation into school classes, and we begin talking about what types of courses they both are taking.
 

Chapter Two

Keegan, Alec and I walk around the campus after dinner. When we get back to their dorm it’s 10 p.m.  I decided I’m going to sit through some classes tomorrow. I grab my pj’s and go change. When I get back the boys are both lounging on their beds. I go to the futon, I grab my bag, and my cell phone falls out. Crap I forgot to turn it on. As soon as it powers up it starts vibrating and beeping continuously. All but one message is from Dillon, with a total of thirty five text messages, The other one is from my mom. I go immediately to the one from her and it says
‘Have fun sweetheart xoxo’
. She tries. I know she just wants me to be happy. It would be easier for her and dad if I went away to school. Dillon wants me to go to Western and be with him, but I am not staying here in London, even if it is my home. If I decide not to go to Lakehead I will go to Guelph University.

I go to open Dillon’s messages, and I know I will regret this.

His first messages say:

W
hat do you mean you’re going
?

Y
ou’re not going anywhere we had plans

Answer your phone Becky
. Now!

There are about twenty more like this. I go to the last one, and it says:

Who do you think you are ignoring me bitch?”

I sigh. I didn’t know my brother had left the room to shower, and I notice Keegan staring at the screen. I quickly delete it and try to act normal.

“Becca, are you okay? Who sent you that?” I quickly tell him it’s a wrong number.

My brother comes
back in, and I grab my toothbrush and head out. I go to the bathroom and brush my teeth. I try to compose myself.

Dillon is pissed. He’s been getting more and more like this. He told me he loved me two weeks ago, and I didn’t say it back. I don’t love Dillon. Half the time I can’t stand to be around him
. When I am I make sure it’s mostly group settings or at my house with my parent’s home, so he doesn’t have an opportunity to push me. He’s getting forward. All I have done is kiss him, and it was not something I want to do again. He says he understands, but I don’t think he does. We never talked about it, so we aren’t exclusive, and he can go out with whoever he wants. I tell him it’s too soon for a boyfriend. I think it might be time to end things. I only have been trying to do this so my parents will stop worrying about me, but if I tell them it’s for the best because I am leaving for school in the fall they will understand.

I head back to the room
and just before I open the door, I notice it’s open a bit. I hear Keegan say, “She’s dating this Dillon guy?”

My brother answers, “No, man
. Well, kind of. It’s not serious though. I think she just does it because she thinks it’s expected. I heard horrible things about him in high school. No girl stuck around long. I just want to get Bec here so I know she’s okay.”

“Listen Alec, I think I just saw a message from him when I came up beside her, he said ‘she was a bitch’.” I hear my brother curse.
Great, now they know. I don’t want my brother involved, it will just make Dillon pissed off.

“We will show her around, she’ll love it here
, bro, and she’ll be here in the fall and be safe.”

I decide at that point to walk in.
Keegan smiles at me and it makes me melt. What is happening, I don’t have these sorts of feelings not since Michael. This is wrong, I won’t feel this way about someone else because then it's like Michael meant nothing and I have forgotten him.

They
are both just staring at me now. I know my brother wants to say something, but he just walks up to me and hugs me and says, “Tomorrow will be epic, you’re in the big league now, sis, time to see university teaching.”