Authors: William Shakespeare
Would I were young for your sake, Mistress Anne.
The dinner is on the table, my father desires your
I will wait on him, fair Mistress Anne.
’Od’s plessèd will! I will not be absence at the grace.
Exeunt Shallow and Evans
Will’t please your worship to come in, sir?
No, I thank you,
, heartily. I am very well.
I am not a-hungry, I thank you, forsooth.—
A justice of peace sometime may be
to his friend
for a man. I keep but three men and a boy yet, till my mother
be dead: but
, yet I live like a poor gentleman
I may not go in without your worship: they will not
sit till you come.
I’faith, I’ll eat nothing. I thank you as much as
though I did.
I pray you, sir, walk in.
I had rather walk here, I thank you. I bruised my
shin th’other day with playing at sword and dagger with a
and, by my troth, I cannot abide the
smell of hot meat
Why do your dogs bark so? Be there bears i’th’town?
I think there are, sir. I heard them talked of.
well, but I shall as soon quarrel at it,
as any man in England. You are afraid if you see the bear
loose, are you not?
Ay, indeed, sir.
That’s meat and drink to me, now. I have seen
loose twenty times, and have taken him by the
chain: but, I
you, the women have so cried and
shrieked at it that it
. But women, indeed, cannot
abide ’em: they are very
Come, gentle Master Slender, come: we stay for you.
I’ll eat nothing, I thank you, sir.
Nay, pray you lead the way.
Come on, sir.
Mistress Anne, yourself shall go first.
Not I, sir, pray you,
Truly, I will not go first. Truly, la! I will not do you
I pray you, sir.
I’ll rather be unmannerly than
troublesome. You do yourself wrong, indeed, la!
running scene 2
Enter Evans and Simple
Go your ways, and ask
Doctor Caius’ house,
which is the way; and there dwells one Mistress Quickly,
Nay, it is petter yet. Give her this letter.
For it is a ’oman that
Anne Page. And the letter is to desire and require her to
your master’s desires to Mistress Anne Page. I pray
you, be gone: I will make an end of my dinner, there’s
and cheese to come.
running scene 3
Enter Falstaff, Host, Bardolph, Nim, Pistol
Mine host of the Garter!
What says my
? Speak scholarly and
Truly, mine host, I must turn away some of my
ten pounds a week.
Do so, good mine host.
I have spoke. Let him follow.— Let me
Bardolph, follow him. A
is a good trade. An
old cloak makes a new
: a withered servingman a fresh
tapster. Go, adieu.
It is a life that I have desired. I will thrive.
: his filching was like an unskilful singer, he
kept not time.
‘Convey’, the wise it call. ‘Steal?’ Foh! A
Well, sirs, I am almost
out at heels
Why then, let
There is no remedy: I must cony-catch, I must
Young ravens must have food.
Which of you know Ford of this town?
ken the wight
: he is of substance good.
My honest lads, I will tell you what I
Two yards, and more.
No quips now, Pistol! Indeed, I am in the waist
two yards about, but I am now about no waste: I am about
thrift. Briefly, I do mean to
make love to
Ford’s wife. I spy
rightly — is, ‘I am Sir John Falstaff’s.’
He hath studied her
, and translated her will,
, into English.
Now, the report goes she has all the rule of her
husband’s purse: he hath a
legion of angels
here a letter to her.
And here another to Page’s wife, who even now gave me
good eyes too, examined my parts with most judicious
. Sometimes the beam of her view gilded my foot,
sometimes my portly belly.
Then did the sun on dunghill shine.
I thank thee for that
O, she did so
o’er my exteriors with such a
, that the appetite of her eye did seem to
scorch me up like a
. Here’s another letter to
and bounty. I will be
to them both, and they shall be
to me. They shall be my East and West Indies,
and I will
to them both.— Go bear thou this
letter to Mistress Page — and thou this to Mistress
Ford. We will thrive, lads, we will thrive.
Shall I Sir
Pandarus of Troy
And by my side wear steel
? Then Lucifer take all!
Gives back the letter
run no base humour
. Here, take the
Gives the letter back
Hold, sirrah, bear you these letters
Sail like my
to these golden shores.
! Vanish like hailstones: go,
Falstaff will learn the
of the age,
Exeunt Falstaff and Robin
Wilt thou revenge?
and her star!
wit or steel
of this love to Ford.
And I to Page shall
How Falstaff, varlet vile,
His dove will
, his gold will hold,
And his soft couch defile.
My humour shall not cool. I will incense Ford to
deal with poison. I will possess him with
, for the
of mine is dangerous. That is my true humour.