Wicked Love (Wicked White Series Book 3) (17 page)

I pull my cell out of my pocket and dial Blake’s number, but it goes straight to voice mail. “Yo, Blake, it’s Tyler. Give me a call when you get this. I wanted to see what your plans for the evening were. Later.”

I end the call and then stuff the phone back into my pocket before jumping into my rental.

The drive to Mom’s doesn’t take me long, and the moment I pull in the driveway, I immediately feel comfortable. This little yellow ranch house, no matter how old I get or how far away I live, will always feel like home to me.

I step out of the car and gravel crunches under my boots as I walk the path to Mom’s front door. I twist the knob on the front door, but it’s locked. I furrow my brow. That’s odd. She never locks her doors, especially if she’s expecting someone.

I knock on the door. “Ma, it’s me. You in there?”

The rustling on the other side of the door, and then her undoing the locks, tells me she knows I’m out here.

The door swings open and my petite, blond mother has a grin on her face from ear to ear. “There’s my boy! It’s so good to see you.” She wraps her arms around my torso and squeezes me in a tight hug. “It’s about time you came home to see your mama!”

I chuckle. “It’s good to see you too, Ma.” I step back and inspect her. “You cut your hair?”

She flips her short blond locks around with her fingers. “You like it? I thought it was time to change things up a bit.”

“It suits you,” I tell her and then glance around the house to find that nothing else has changed. I frown when I notice the same furniture that’s been in her living room since I was a kid is still present. “Where’s your new furniture?”

She waves me off dismissively and heads toward the kitchen. “I told you to stop sending me money. I refuse to spend a dime of it.”

“Ma, how many times are we going to fight about this? That money is to take care of anything you need.” I follow her into the kitchen, where I’m greeted with the smell of her famous pot roast and my stomach rumbles.

“Baby, you should be saving your money instead of giving it away.”

“I’m not giving it away. I want to make sure you’re taken care of. If Dad were here, he would have no problem letting me do this for you.”

“If your Dad was here, he would’ve whooped your butt for running off like you did in the first place.”

“I highly doubt that,” I tell her. “He made me promise him that I would get out of this town as soon as I could and go after my music dream.”

“He might’ve done that because he wanted to see you go experience more than we ever did, but he never meant for you to avoid where you come from. He didn’t want you to avoid this place either. Not seeing your mother in three years is a travesty.”

I sigh and rub my forehead. My mother is a stubborn woman and when she’s made up her mind that things should be a certain way, that’s how it is. There’s no changing her view. Like now. I know she’s upset with me for not visiting in all this time, but I was too afraid to come back here and face Avery. I wasn’t ready to face the guilt and shame. It took me a year’s worth of therapy to realize that if I didn’t come back here and deal with my past, I could never really move on.

I offered to fly Mom out to see me while Wicked White was on tour, or even when we spent some downtime at our homes in California, but she always rejected the idea. Mom’s fear of flying limits a lot of things for her, visiting her only child being a crucial one.

I know the only way to make her happy is to promise to change all that. “I get where you’re coming from, Ma. From now on, I’ll make sure I come out and see you way more often. How’s that sound?”

Mom smiles. “That sounds like a good plan to me.” She takes the lid off the crock pot and stirs the roast beef around a bit. “Hope you’re hungry. I haven’t cooked this much in a long time.”

“Starving.” I laugh and hug her and kiss the top of her head. “Let’s eat.”

I spend the rest of the afternoon with Ma, telling her all about my adventures on the road and about the process in the studio when we cut albums. She listens like it’s the most fascinating stuff in the world.

I’ve missed spending time with her, and she’s right, I need to make sure I see her more often.

When I glance down at my phone, I notice two things. One, that it’s nearly five thirty so I should head on over to Avery’s place to have dinner with her and Granny, and two, that Blake still hasn’t returned my call, which is unlike him.

I push myself up from the comfy couch in the living room. “I need to take off. I’m going to go have dinner with an old friend while I’m in town.”

A knowing smile fills her face. “Would this be the same mysterious someone you used to see a lot before you left?”

I laugh, amazed at her memory. “I can’t believe you remember that.”

“Honey, I’m your mother. I remember everything about you.” She hugs me one more time. “Be careful out there. This town has gone to shit in the last few years. The crime rate—well, let’s just say nothing’s safe around here anymore.”

Her locked door springs to mind. “Is that why you were barricaded in here earlier?”

She nods. “I’m a single woman, living in the country alone. Can’t be too careful nowadays. Be safe.”

“Always am,” I tell her as I head out the front door and to the car.

It doesn’t take long for me to make it to Avery’s driveway. My fingers curl around the steering wheel and I grip it tight to try to ignore the awful memories of the last time I was here. I turn down the driveway, and soon the house comes into view, only this time it’s twice the size I remember it being and it practically looks brand-new. I’m guessing after the fire, this place was a total gut job. The house is wrapped in new white siding while new windows add to the curb appeal. When my eyes slide over, just right of the house where the barn used to be, I’m relieved to see only a patch of grass where it once stood.

I park next to the house, beside the Mercedes. The car reminds me of Avery’s father, and I have doubts about being able to handle going inside the house where he used to live.

It hurts to know that I was so self-centered that I didn’t stick around to be there for Avery when things got tough for her—for the times when she needed me the most. I wasn’t strong enough to be there for her then, but I’m praying that all the soul-searching I’ve done since I left will help me find the strength to be here for her now, for as much as she will let me.

Avery opens the screen door and she pokes her head outside and waves me in, so I know sitting in this car and debating if I can make it through this dinner is out.

I hop out of the car and grab the bouquet of flowers I picked up on the way over for Avery’s grandmother as a thank-you for the dinner she’s fixing tonight. I won’t know what to do when I go back onto the road after having all these home-cooked meals. I won’t be able to stomach fast food again for a while.

I make it to the top of the third step on the porch and Avery greets me by holding open the screen door while wearing a smile. “You made it.”

Her relieved tone sets me at ease. Maybe just like last night, this dinner will be easier to get through than I anticipate. The only thing that will cause me to lose my shit right now is a lot of talk about her dad.

I step inside and the place is almost as I remember, only with hardwood floors throughout the house and more modern furniture. “Wow. It really looks nice in here.”

She nods. “Thanks. We like it.”

“Looks like they got that addition done too,” I add.

“Oh yeah, we just had them include the construction cost of adding a new bedroom to the renovation budget, so it worked out quite well.”

A high-pitched, shrill scream erupts from the back of the house, which catches me off guard. I wasn’t aware this was a family event. “Are there more people here than just you and Granny?”

Avery twists her pouty pink lips. “You could say that.”

“Oh,” is all I say. “If you’re having family over, I don’t want to impose.”

“Don’t be silly, Tyler. You’re our guest of honor.”

“I—I am?”

“Yes. Now come on. We don’t want to keep them waiting.” Avery takes me by the hand and pulls me through the house, but stops me just short of reaching the kitchen.

She pauses for a moment to take a deep breath.

I give her hand a squeeze. “You okay?”

She turns toward me and sighs. “I’m sorry. I thought I could do this, but I don’t think I can.”

There’s a change in her demeanor. She’s gone from overly happy to see me to apprehensive.

I furrow my brow. “You’re not making any sense, Avery. Can’t go through with what?”

She opens her mouth to say something, but quickly closes it as two little bare feet slapping against the wood floor come charging toward us.

A little girl wearing a pink dress stretches her hands up into the air as she runs toward us. Her two blond pigtails bounce as Avery scoops her up into her arms. “Momeeee. Whet’s eat.”

“We have to wait a minute, Maddie.” Avery’s voice softens when she speaks to her. “I want you to meet someone special. Can you tell the nice man, hello?”

Maddie looks at me, smiles, and greets me. “Helwhoa.”

My mouth drops open as I stare at the little girl who is now in Avery’s arms. She can’t be more than two or three years old, but I’m not really good with kids’ ages so that’s a total guess.

Avery stands there, holding the girl, while staring at my face, gauging my reaction. I don’t know what she expects me to say. Once I quickly do the math, it takes me back that she would have a child with someone else so quickly after I left, but I’m in no place to judge her for her actions.

“She’s beautiful,” I tell Avery.

“Thank you. I think she looks a lot like her daddy.” Avery’s eyes meet mine and for some reason I just know.

There’s a ping of acknowledgment down deep in my gut that hits me hard in that moment. It’s not difficult to figure out why Avery was so nervous moments ago and nearly changed her mind about me staying for dinner.

I might as well ask the obvious question that I know Avery’s waiting for me to say.

I lick my suddenly dry lips, as I stand there still in shock. “Is she . . .
mine
?”

Avery swallows hard, then nods. “Yes.”

“How . . . When . . .” So many questions rage through my mind that I don’t even know where to begin, but I can’t hold back the biggest question on my mind. “Why didn’t you tell me about her? Didn’t you think I had the right to know that I had a daughter?”

“Of course I should’ve told you.” She bites her lower lip. “I guess I was afraid that you’d reject her like you did me and I couldn’t risk my little girl’s heart getting crushed like mine did. I’ll do anything to protect Maddie, but she’s getting older and now that she’s beginning to talk pretty well, she’s been asking more and more about you. She deserves to know her father. You and I both know how important a father is.”

Those words are like a solid punch to the gut and make me feel even more like a piece of shit for leaving than I did before.

“Avery . . . I’m . . . I . . .” It’s hard for me to express exactly what I’m feeling.

I’m angry with Avery for not telling me about our daughter, but I’m also scared shitless that this little girl in front of me now owns my heart completely and she doesn’t even know me yet.

But that’s going to change. From this point on, I’m going to be there for her—for both of them.

“I know this is a lot, and I want you to know that I don’t expect anything from you. I just wanted you to meet her.” Avery reaches over and places her hand on my forearm. “Come on. Let’s eat and I swear I’ll answer any question you have.”

Desperately needing answers, I follow her into the kitchen while attempting to reconstruct the shattered parts of my mind and wrap my head around the fact that I’m a father.

AVERY

I
fully expected Tyler to go ballistic on me once he discovered I’ve kept our daughter a secret from him. I know I would’ve gone nuts if I were him, but I hope he understands that I did what I thought was right at the time. I was afraid of him hurting Maddie if he ran out on her someday like he did on me.

His life seems so busy, and I’m not sure how much time he’ll have for her, but at least now the decision is on him. If he chooses not to be a part of her life, I will understand. It will hurt like hell, but I won’t force him to be around her if he doesn’t want to be.

I’ve been supporting the two of us for years, and I plan on keeping that up no matter what happens. I like standing on my two feet, and proving to myself that I can be an independent woman. That’s really important to me because I don’t want to be anything like my mother.

Going back to school was no longer an option those first couple of years after my little girl was born. Luckily Granny was there every step of the way with me. She’s taught me how to be a good mother—how to really take care of someone other than myself. She and I have raised Maddie together.

Granny’s at the stove, pouring all the food out of pots and into bowls. She turns and notices Tyler standing there.

A smile crosses her face and she opens her arms to him without any reservations. “Aren’t you a sight for sore eyes? It’s good to see you, honey. I hope you’re hungry because I went all out today. We’ve got fried chicken, mashed potatoes—the works.”

Tyler laughs. “I’m starving and it sounds amazing. Between you and my mom, if you guys keep feeding me like this, I’ll be five hundred pounds when it’s time for me to go back out on the road.”

Granny waves him off. “Pfft. Now you’re startin’ to sound like Avery when she first came here a few years back—worried about maintaining her girlie figure. Ain’t nothing wrong with having a little meat on your bones. It’s healthy. It took me a while to convince Avery that it was okay to eat more than a goddamn salad.”

“Granny,” I scold her while I set Maddie down in her booster seat and push her up to the table. “Language.”

Granny grimaces. “Sorry. Old habits and all that are hard to break. I’ve been doing my best though to cut out the cursing completely now that we have a little set of ears takin’ in everything we’re sayin’.”

Tyler laughs because he’s been around my granny enough to know that’s no easy feat for her. I think her favorite word in the world is
damn
.

I chuckle to myself as I turn around and grab the plate of chicken off the counter and place it on the table.

“Is there anything I can do to help?” Tyler asks me.

“We got this, but it would be great if you could keep Maddie entertained until we’re ready.”

He bites his lip and looks hesitantly down at the daughter he’s only just met. It’s like he needs a bit of reassurance to talk with her. “You sure?”

I smile. “Of course. You’re her father. She’ll love getting to know you.”

Tyler pulls out the chair next to Maddie and sits down next to her. “Hi, Maddie. How are you?”

“Good,” she answers but never really looks at him as her eyes are trained on the lock-and-key toy sitting on the table in front of her. She bites her tongue—something she’s been doing more and more of lately as she focuses on whatever task is at hand. She tries to stick the key in the lock, but it won’t budge. “Fix it, Daddy.”

My eyes widen and my heart does a double thump behind my ribcage. The use of the word
daddy
is so natural that it takes me back a bit.

Tyler’s eyes widen and then flick up to mine. “Did she . . .”

I set a bowl of mashed potatoes on the table. “She did.”

“How did she know that I’m her dad?”

I stare down and watch Maddie as she continues to work on the toy in front of her. “When we were getting dressed for dinner, I explained to her that she would be meeting someone special, and when she asked me who it was, I simply told her that she would be meeting her daddy. I never dreamed that she would call you that right away.”

“Child’s smart,” Granny says, butting into our conversation. “Hopefully even smarter than you two.”

“Granny,” I warn, not ready for her to start preaching to us about all the mistakes Tyler and I have been making and how we haven’t been fair to Maddie. “Now’s not the time. I didn’t invite Tyler over here so you could give him the third degree.”

“It’s not just Tyler who needs to hear what I’ve got to say—both of you have done a lot of wrong, and I think it’s high time you work out some way to fix it.”

“That’s what I’m trying to do, Granny—fix everything. It was wrong of me to not tell Tyler the moment I found out I was pregnant. I know that’s how you feel, but at the time, I thought I was making a good choice by not telling him.”

“Well, you were wrong. Both of you. You were wrong for not telling him and you—” She flicks her gaze from me to Tyler. “—You were wrong for just leaving her behind like that. Did you ever plan on contacting her again to see how she was doing with everything?”

Tyler’s face blanches. “I meant to, but I didn’t think she would want to hear an apology from me so soon after I left, and I was too busy running to hear what she had to say to me. The passage of time doesn’t make me any less sorry for what happened though.”

She nods. “That’s good to hear. Now that you’ve both admitted that you were wrong for ending things the way you did, the two of you can start working things out. You both need to get on the same page and stick there for the sake of Maddie. The little angle deserves the best from both of you.”

I sigh, and as many times as I’ve heard similar speeches from her over the last three years, it doesn’t make hearing it again this time with Tyler any less impactful. She’s always been right—deep down I’ve known that.

“She’s right,” Tyler says. “We need to figure this out. I want the opportunity to get to know her—to be a part of her life—so I’m willing to do whatever it takes to make things work between us, Avery, so we can both be there for Maddie.”

“Daddy, fix it,” Maddie says to Tyler while holding up the pink plastic lock and key.

Tyler takes the toy from her tiny hands and sticks the key into the slot and then twists. “There you go.”

Maddie squeals with delight as the latch opens up and swings free from its locked position. “Yaya! Daddy fixed it!”

We all clap and focus our attention on the little girl who has completely stolen all of our hearts.