William Shakespeare's The Phantom Menace (16 page)

Have you the planet verily secur'd?

We've ta'en control of all the remnants of

The primitives that o'er the planet roam.

Naboo is now in our complete command.

'Tis well. I shall, for my part, cause such stalls

Within the Senate that all shall remain

Just as it is. The status quo shall hold.

To be assur'd of your continu'd strength,

I shall send my apprentice, e'en Darth Maul,

To help maintain your power o'er Naboo.

Indeed, my lord.

[Exit Darth Sidious from beam
.

—A Sith shall hither come?

Now doth a madness new before us rise.

[Exeunt Nute and Rune from balcony
.

Enter
O
BI
-W
AN
K
ENOBI
, R
IC
O
LIÉ
,
and
A
NAKIN
S
KYWALKER
aside, in the cockpit of the Naboo cruiser
.

Those do control the forward stabilizers.

And these control the pitch?

—They do, indeed.

Thou art a student quick and most astute.

Enter
Q
UI
-G
ON
J
INN
, Q
UEEN
A
MIDALA
, J
AR
J
AR
B
INKS
,
and
C
APTAIN
P
ANAKA
.

once we do land, the Federation shall

Arrest your royal person, bind you as

A common criminal, and force you then

To sign their awful treaty.

—I agree.

I do not see what profit comes of this.

I shall but even out our bottom line,

And take back what belongs to us by right.

'Tis not for profit, but for justice's sake.

We few, we happy few, are but too few.

We have no army that can match their count.

I can protect you, but can fight no war.

'Tis understood. I call on Jar Jar Binks.

You wantin' meesa, Youra Highness?

I do. The queen hath need of thy kind help.

[Obi-Wan, Ric, and Anakin join the others
.

As we did land, a battleship was seen

Upon our scopes—a single one, 'tis true,

Yet one shall be enough to give us chase.

It was a droid control ship, orbiting.

Belike they saw us as we landing made.

To make it brief: time runneth short for us.

[Exeunt
.

Enter
R
UMOR
.

Below, upon the ground, a hope doth wait,

E'en as the ship doth land, all have new fears.

Herein all those on board shall find their fate—

O, how it frightfully unknown appears.

Look now, as I do make their hearts afraid,

Determin'd, yet deterr'd by all their doubt.

The final act shall on Naboo be play'd,

Hath Rumor set the pieces to work out?

E'en now, the Jedi start to doubt their place:

Guards they shall be unto the queen no more.

Uniting these two people face-to-face—

Naboo's hopes to ensure—is not their chore.

Good soldiers of the queen become nonpluss'd

And e'en Queen Amidala, in her breast,

Now hath, by Rumor's will, more doubt than trust:

Shall they on Jar Jar all their future rest?

Enter
Q
UI
-G
ON
J
INN
and
O
BI
-W
AN
K
ENOBI
.

Toward the Gungan city Jar Jar's gone.

'Tis well.

—Think you the queen's idea shall fly?

The Gungans shall not easily be sway'd;

Thus let us hope the urgency's enough

To give wing to Her Majesty's idea.

We cannot use the pow'r we have to help,

As we are peacekeepers, not warring men.

Good Master, what e'er comes, I'd have you know:

For my behavior I apologize.

'Tis not my place to disagree with you

About the boy, and hearty thanks I feel

That you should think me ready for the trials.

Thou art a keen apprentice, Obi-Wan,

And art a wiser man by leagues than I.

'Tis clear, as I upon the waters of

Thy future gaze, that thou shalt navigate

What is to come with grace, be pilot of

A wondrous course, a winsome Jedi Knight.

Enter
J
AR
J
AR
B
INKS
(from water)
, S
ABÉ
dressed as Queen Amidala
, P
ADMÉ
, A
NAKIN
S
KYWALKER
, R2-D2, C
APTAIN
P
ANAKA
, R
IC
O
LIÉ
,
other
N
ABOO SOLDIERS
,
and, separately
,
MEMBERS OF THE QUEEN'S COURT
.

Nobody's dere! De Gungan city

Deserted is. Some fight, me thinkin'.

Think'st thou they have been taken to the camps,

Where Federation's foes are all intern'd?

Belike the Gungans all have been destroy'd.

Yet meesa nowee think so, Captain.

Dost know where they may be, meek Jar Jar? Eh?

When trouble come, they go place sacred.

Come, meesa show you it! Come withee!

All journey to the Gungan sacred site. Enter
B
OSS
N
ASS
, other G
UNGAN BOSSES
,
and
C
APTAIN
T
ARPALS
.

Your honor, wise Boss Nass, I do present

Queen Amidala, ruler of Naboo.

Hello, de big Boss Nass, your honor.

o, Jar Jar Binks, now who's da uss-en uthers?

I am Queen Amidala of Naboo.

I come before your royal court in peace.

Naboo biggen. Youse bringin' mackineeks,

And yousa bringin' trouble, all bombad.

We humbly come before you to suggest

Betwixt our peoples an alliance strong.

Your honor.

—Whosa diss? And why she speak?

I am Queen Amidala. This is but

My decoy, my protection, loyal guard.

She speaketh for me when it serves the time,

But you, Boss Nass, deserve the rightful queen.

[
aside:
] The handmaiden had play'd a hidden hand,

And dealt us all an unexpected shock.

For this deception, my apology;

'Twas necessary to protect myself.

Your honor, hear my deferential plea:

Though our two peoples have not e'er agreed,

Our two societies have liv'd in peace.

The vile Trade Federation hath destroy'd

All we have work'd so ardently to build.

If action is not swift, all shall be lost.

I call on you to help us. [
Kneeling:
] Nay, I beg—

A queen's humility giv'n for your aid.

Myself and those with me are servants now.

[The Naboo, the Jedi, and Anakin Skywalker kneel
.

You work the loom of our yet unknown fate.

Ha! Yousa nowa thinkin' yousa great

Beyond de Gungans now. Me lika dis!

Mayhap shall be dat weesa bein' friends.

I shall away, to learn what may be found

That may be advantageous to our cause.

[Exit Captain Panaka. The Gungans and the Naboo embrace and then begin forming battle lines
.

Enter
N
UTE
G
UNRAY
, R
UNE
H
AAKO
,
and
D
ARTH
M
AUL
on balcony, with
D
ARTH
S
IDIOUS
in beam
.

Our strong patrols have been sent forth, my lord.

Their starship in the swamplands hath been found.

It shall not be too long ere they're destroy'd.

An unexpected play this is for her.

'Tis too aggressive. [
To Darth Maul:
] Mindful be,

Lord Maul.

Pray, let them be the first to make a move.

Indeed, my master, just as you do say.

She is more foolish than I e'er did think.

All troops have been dispatch'd unto the swamp

Where she with her small force assembles now.

It doth appear she's join'd with primitives.

This shall be an advantage to us, quite.

I may proceed, then?

—Yea. Destroy them all,

Erase all trace or memory of them.

[Exeunt Nute Gunray, Rune Haako, Darth Maul, and Darth Sidious from beam
.

[
to Jar Jar:
] O, yousa doin' grand, good Jar Jar. You

Hat uss-en and Naboo together brought.

Thus, weesa make you bombad general!

A general! O meeso happy!

Enter
C
APTAIN
P
ANAKA
with several
N
ABOO SOLDIERS
.

Good Captain, how doth our position stand?

They have ta'en nearly ev'ryone to camps.

There are, as yet, some hundreds who have form'd

An underground resistance movement here.

Full many as I could, I've hither brought.

So far's the news that we may count as good,

Yet there is more that rings a grimmer note:

The Federation's army is more vast

And far more pow'rful than we first bethought.

Your Highness, I believe we'll not prevail—

I fear this battle may undo us quite.

This battle's but a side dish to the main—

A savory diversion to the feast.

The truer course shall elsewhere be array'd,

A table we shall in the city set.

Keen R2-D2, furnish us the plans.

[R2-D2 projects a beam showing a map of the city
.

The Gungans hither draw the droidly throng,

Whilst we make way into the city by

The hidden passage near the waterfalls.

Once we obtain unto the entrance main,

Panaka shall a new diversion craft.

This being done, we others shall go forth

Into the palace, capturing the viceroy.

Sans him, they shall be lost and sore confus'd,

And thus, the day is ours. What do you think?

A cunning plan, if all doth go as hop'd.

The viceroy shall be guarded thoroughly.

It shall take pains the throne room to obtain,

But once therein, it shall be easier.

There is an ample possibility

That in this action many Gungans fall.

Ahh, weesa all prepar'd to do ours part.

We have a plan that shall immobilize

The army of the droids. Our pilots brave

Shall fly unto the droid control ship, which

E'en now doth make its orbit, and destroy

It utterly, disabling all the droids.