Above His Station (28 page)
The thing about reincarnation, at least what I know of it from my admittedly limited grasp of the concept, is that you don’t retain any memories of who you used to be. It wasn’t like in
Doctor Who
when one of the actors decides to leave and he just gets replaced by someone else with a different face, a different hairstyle; a different personality, even. With reincarnation, even though you were still you, you weren’t really you anymore, if that makes any sense. You were someone else, some
thing
else, and I took no solace from that.
‘I’m sorry, human,’ Astrid said, barely able to meet my gaze.
‘What on earth have you got to be sorry about?’ I asked her.
‘My father, he…’
‘Exactly,’ I said. ‘Your father. Not you. He’s the one who’s responsible. Without you, we wouldn’t even have made it this far and he would have got away with his plans. I only wish I could repay you somehow, but as you can see, I don’t exactly have much to give. No, wait…maybe I do.’ Rummaging around inside my satchel, I pulled out a tiny parcel wrapped in newspaper and offered it to Astrid. ‘Here. Just to say thank you.’
Using her weird telekinesis power, Astrid opened the carefully-folded corners, revealing the prize within. Four china ornaments; a father horse, a mother horse and two little baby horses. ‘I don’t know what to say.’
‘You don’t need to say anything,’ I told her, brushing the underside of her chin.
‘No, I meant…I
really
don’t know what to say. What are these things supposed to be?’
‘Molly’s ornaments…that’s my late wife,’ I said, by way of an explanation. ‘They were her prized possessions.’
‘In that case I couldn’t possibly acc-’
‘Please,’ I said, firmly. ‘Molly would want them to go to a good home, and to be honest if I carry them around with me much longer, I’m liable to break the ruddy things and then I’ll never forgive myself.’
‘Thank you,’ said Astrid, giving me a nice smile. ‘I’ll look after them, I swear.’
‘I know you will,’ I told her. ‘You know, it’s a shame that Asclepia is so far away. I’d liked to have paid you a visit to see how you’re getting on, running a whole planet and all that. It’s not going to be easy, especially with a crisis to contend with.’
‘No…but I have a lot of catching up to do at the A.R.S.E. Our sun will die in thirteen sheds, and I only pray that our best scientists can devise a solution before then. It’s going to be strange though, going home after all these years. I wonder how it’s changed.’
‘I was just thinking the same,’ I said, with my shoulders down. ‘There’s nothing there for me now.’
‘Come on, Gramps, you’ve still got me!’ said the rat, cheerfully.
‘Actually, he’s got a bit more than that,’ said Astrid. ‘I’d hoped that my father would be able to restore mankind to normality, so I didn’t mention it before.’
‘Mention what before?’ I asked.
‘I stumbled upon something else whilst I was snooping about in my father’s suite last night, some information regarding this
Operation: Neo-Asclepia
that he was working on. Apparently, although the
S-Triple-R
’s reach was extensive, there were a very small percentage of humans that were unexplainably immune to its effects, just as you were.’
I was flabbergasted!
Perhaps all was not lost after all.
Dare I even hope?
‘Are you sure about this?’ I asked. ‘That there might actually be other people left on Earth besides me?’
‘Positive,’ replied Astrid. ‘Remember during the hearing when my father said about the
S-Triple-R
, that it was a shame that the technology “
didn’t work on them all
”? This is what he meant!’
‘How many?’ I said, numbly. ‘How many humans survived?’
Astrid paused. ‘I believe it was just over 6 ½ million. I know it is not much compared to the 7 billion or so prior to the attack, but still…’
‘Yes…still,’ I said. ‘And whereabouts are these people? Probably scattered about in pockets all over the world, knowing my luck.’
‘Switzerland,’ confirmed Astrid. ‘All of them, in fact. The entire population of the country was left completely unchanged by the
S-Triple-R
’s effects.’
‘Typical of the bloody Swiss,’ I said. ‘Jammy bastards, the lot of them.’
‘So what’s the plan, Gramps? Where are we off to next?’ asked the rat, tugging at my sleeve.
I took a deep breath, filling my lungs to their brim, feeling as if I was just about to leap off a cliff into the unknown. Hearing the news about Switzerland had made my world quake once more, and I couldn’t take it all in. My hopes were in the pit of my stomach, barely able to get off the ground. ‘Anywhere that does a decent cup of tea would be a start.’
‘Certainly,’ Astrid said. ‘It’ll just take a few moments to generate the necessary strength of will for the transcendental thought transference, and then I can have you back in London as quick as a flash.’
‘This transcendental thingamabob of yours,’ I said, broaching the subject with care. ‘You said that it can take us anywhere in the Universe, is that right?’
‘As long as I have enough will to get us there, yes.’
‘In that case, let’s do a quick stop at the nearest
Marks & Spencer
. After all, I’m going to need to get some thermal underwear if I’m off to Switzerland.’
‘Switzerland? Really?’ asked the rat. ‘Do you think they’ll do any in my size?’
‘What, you mean want to come along?’ I asked it.
‘Of course, I do! I mean…if it’s okay by you.’
‘It’s more than okay by me,’ I said. ‘But don’t you have any family or friends? You’ve been gone from Earth a long time. Surely they’ll be missing you by now.’
‘I’ve got no one, Gramps…no one that I care enough about to miss out on another adventure with you, anyway,’ said the rat, giving my elbow a playful punch. ‘And look at all the awesome fun we’ve had together, eh? Attacked by tigers and wolves, we’ve met car-driving flamingos, anteater policemen, gorilla bodyguards…we even had an audience with the king of the jungle before zapping off into outer space where we met a whole bunch of freaky aliens and shit. And it’d be a shame to split up the old team, wouldn’t it?’
‘Well, in that case.’ I offered my furry companion the crook of my arm and it was in its usual spot on my shoulder in a flash. ‘Just promise that you’ll stop reading my mind, will you? Half the time I don’t know if it’s me saying something that I’m thinking, or me saying something that
you’re
thinking. It’s starting to get terribly confusing.’
‘It’s funny,’ said the rat. ‘I was just going to say that.’
THE END.
If you’re one of those people that reads books back to front, you might want to skip this bit ‘cos it contains spoilers (a trip to a psychologist might not be a bad idea either). But if you’re one of those normal types who did it properly, you probably noticed lots of references scattered throughout
ABOVE HIS STATION
(some vague, some not so). Here are a few choice nuggets:
The melody to
The Lion Sleeps Tonight
was originally written by Solomon Linda and called
Mbube
, which is the Zulu word meaning ‘
lion
’. The song has been adapted and recorded by many artists since then including The Weavers, The Tokens, REM, Brian Eno and Tight Fit in 1982 (when it was Number 1 for three whole weeks!).
Gary Cooper was a mainstay of many Westerns, the most notable being
High Noon
.
David Carradine played the role of Caine in the 70’s TV series
Kung Fu
.
The Gruffalo
is by Julia Donaldson and illustrated by Axel Scheffler.
Doctor Dolittle
was a 1967 musical starring Rex Harrison and was remade as a comedy with Eddie Murphy in 1998. They made four more
Dr Dolittle
films after that, but only two were released at the cinema. Eddie Murphy (some might say wisely) declined to appear after that, and so the title role went to his daughter Maya, played by Kyla Pratt.
The Omega Man
was a 1971 film starring Charlton Heston based on
I Am Legend
written by Richard Matheson. It was remade in 2007 starring Will Smith. Preceding both of those versions was
The Last Man On Earth
in 1964 starring Vincent Price
.
Sir David Attenborough is a well-known television presenter, naturalist and author.
Brian Cox is a well-brainy professor of particle physics and presenter of astronomy-type television programmes. He also used to play keyboards for
D:Ream
, pop trivia fans!
The Lion King
was a 1994 Disney film. It birthed 2 sequels:
The Lion King 2: Simba’s Pride
in 1998 and
The Lion King 1 ½ Hakuna Matata
(technically a prequel) in 2004.
Bronson Pinchot played Serge in
Beverly Hills Cop
and
Beverly Hills Cop 3
. If you haven’t seen the scene in the art gallery from the first one, look it up on
YouTube
now!
The line “
Snakes. Why did it have to be snakes?
” is from
Raiders of the Lost Ark
.
“66-69-NCC-1701” is how Asclepians designate the moon of Puck.
NCC-1701
was the registration number of the
USS Enterprise
from the original
Star Trek
TV series that ran from 1966 – 1969.
The rat calls himself ‘
Nick Furry
’ as a nod to Nick Fury, Director of the
Strategic Homeland Intervention Enforcement and Logistics Division
(
S.H.I.E.L.D for short).
In the court hearing, the rat mentions “
legislation code 4:8:15:16:23/42
”, which are the same numbers that are found inside the hatch in the TV series
LOST
.
No animals were harmed during the making of this book.
Here are just some of the ways that I can be contacted, should you feel an overwhelming urge.
Facebook:
Darren Craske Books
Twitter:
@DarrenCraske
Blog:
http://darrencraskeblog.wordpress.com
email:
[email protected]
My Other Books
- The CORNELIUS QUAINT CHRONICLES -
The Romulus Equation (Released Late 2012)
The Quaint Christmas
(free ebook short story)
Soundtrack
This book was written to the music of Brian Eno, Aphex Twin, M83, Ed Sheeran, Embrace, Florence and the Machine, TA Walker, David Gray, The Future Sound of London, Blue States, Hybrid, Pearl Jam, Pendulum and Zero 7
Extra thanks to
Caroline Smailes, Scott Pack, Bob Burke, Janet Colley, Tim Walker, Primrose Leat, Jamieson Wolf, Karl Arlow, Eddie Murphy, Tim O’Rourke, Douglas Adams, Tom Holt, Tracy, Aimee & Riley
I thought it would be a bit of fun to share with you a gallery of some of the characters from
ABOVE HIS STATION
.
The Station Guard
In my mind the Station Guard looks a bit like (Sir) Michael Caine. He’s spent all his life working for rail networks and the Underground, so naturally he’s a bit weary in body and soul. He looks quite smart in this picture, and if I were the type of person that puts way too much thought into things of little consequence, I’d imagine that it’s the kind of photo he’s got on his work identity badge or something.
The Rat
Seeing as it’s a wild rodent, it’s not particularly well-groomed in either its physical appearance, or its social skills. I love this guy, and if I could have a furry companion to sit on my shoulder and share lots of adventures in outer space and stuff with, I would want it to be just like the rat.
