Always (Carter Kids #1.5) (7 page)

"You're getting bored with your life?" I rolled my eyes and sighed. "Colt, you're twenty-three. What could possibly be boring about your life? This is Dad's doing, right?"

Colton shrugged. "Dad wanted a solid guarantee you would be in that hotel tomorrow night." Smirking, he added, "Mom is worried about you. Dad is worried about
Mom. Mom wants you at the party, and Dad wants to put a smile on Mom's face. I just happen to be the messenger boy."

With my shoulders slumped, I trudged over to the couch and plopped down, feeling weirdly comforted with having my brother so close after so long apart. "I gather Dad's still a huge control freak," I grumbled. "This sucks."

"I'm going to pretend you didn’t just say that," Colt mused. "Look, Hope, I know Jordan-the-douchebag-Porter did something pretty damn bad to chase you half way across the world, but don’t let him be the cause of breaking Mom's heart."

"I didn’t leave
because
of him," I shot back defensively, lying through my teeth.

"Maybe so," Colt replied calmly. Sitting up, he wrapped his arm around my shoulder and pulled me close to him. "But you haven't come home
because of
him
. I have no idea what happened between you two, Hope," he said quietly and in a weirdly serious tone. "Neither does Cam, or Low, but you are
our
sister, and we've got your back."

"Thank you," I whispered, but I was shaking inside. My nerves were frazzled and the prospect of seeing that man again was causing my anxiety to rise to epic proportions.

"So," Colt said, clearing his throat. "We've got about fifteen hours to waste until our flight. Do wanna go get drunk?"

"Yeah, Colt," I said with a sigh. "I really do."

****

The heat inside Krash nightclub was almost unbearable.

I had only ever been here once before, it was damn close to impossible to gain admission, but my congenial brother had charmed his – and my way – through the shiny black doors to where I was currently occupying a barstool in the exclusive private
area of the club.

I wasn’t a fan of nightclubs. I wasn’t a fan of being crushed by sweaty, overbearing men and braless bimbos either. Men prowled the bar looking for alcohol and release, but I was here for one reason and one reason only: to drown my sorrows and forget about my impending doom.

That was it.

Swallowing what had to be my tenth shot of
Jameson
, I brushed the hand that had landed on my shoulder roughly away and gazed around the room through bleary eyes.

I spotted Colton on the dance floor, surrounded by a group of women, and snorted loudly. One voluptuous blonde was clinging to Colton like he was her chosen mate. Another skinny brunette was grinding against his broad back. Their bodies rubbed against my baby brother, sweat slickened, and I had to swallow some vomit before turning my face away from the sight.

The atmosphere in the private area was energetic – there seemed to be a dynamic buzz in the air. There was a group of girls literally screaming and pointing at the booth furthest away from where I was sitting, and that caught my attention.

When I realized exactly
who
those girls were pointing at, my stomach fell into my ass.

I watched in drunken horror as an insanely attractive man covered in tattoos stood up and tossed back a shot before moving through the crowd of women towards the bar – towards me.

His gaze locked on my face and instant recognition flared in his brown eyes.

"Hope."

Oh crapola …

Jerking off my stool, I pushed past several people, desperate to get away from my uncle, but he moved faster, shoving people out of his way in his bid to reach me.

"Is she here?" he roared. "Is Teagan with you?"

"Stay away from her, Noah," I slurred, as I stumbled down the staircase towards the exit.

I needed to get home and warn Teagan her worst nightmare was partying in a club ten minutes from our apartment.

Shit.

****

"Hope, I swear to God I am going to tie your key around your bloody…"

Teagan's voice trailed off the moment she opened the door and caught a glimpse of my face.

"What's wrong?"

"He's here, Teagan," I choked out as I barreled into her arms. "In Cork. I saw him – at the club," I added. "He's
here
."

"Who?"
Teagan demanded. "Who's here, Hope?"

"Noah," I hissed, and then quickly clapped my hand over my mouth. "He saw me," I added. "Teagan, he knows you're here."

"What?" Teagan's voice was small and frightened. Her face was pale and her brown eyes wide as saucers.
"What did you say?"

Pushing us both into the room, I swung around and slammed the apartment door before bolting it. With my back pressed to the door, I let out a huge sigh of relief. "There," I half-slurred, half-hiccupped. "That'll keep the big douche out."

"A deadbolt?" Shaking her head, Teagan clawed at her hair as she looked around frantically. "You really think a fucking deadbolt is going to keep
him
out …"

"Hope!"

I heard my name being roared out seconds before the sound of banging infiltrated my eardrums and a hard vibration penetrated my back.

"Face him, Teegs," I told her. "Just get it over and done with."

"Like you faced Jordan?" she shot back, nostrils flaring. "Hmm?"

Okay, fuck it! Live like me. Be a goddamn coward.

"Jesus Christ," Teagan whispered, before rushing over to help me barricade the door with her body.

"Hope, I know you're in there. Open the goddamn door, or I'll kick it in."

"Go away, you big ass," I screeched, stumbling away from the door.

"Hide," I mouthed to Teagan and she did.

Running like headless chickens through our own pokey apartment, Teagan dove behind the couch and I crouched behind the coffee table just as the door of our apartment was smashed clean off its hinges.

I peeked up from my hiding spot to see Noah Messina standing in the doorway of our apartment, looking more furious than I had ever seen him look.

"Is that any way to speak to your uncle?" Noah's voice was calm, but the way his fists were clenched and trembling at his sides assured me he was anything but. His dark eyes were focused entirely on my roommate as he ran a hand through his thick black hair.

"Thorn."

I opened my mouth to respond, but Teagan spoke before I had a chance.

"How dare you come in here," she screamed before somersaulting over the back of our couch and launching herself at my uncle.

"Hear me out."

"Go to hell."

"I've been there, sweetheart, and it's not fucking pretty."

I felt incredibly lightheaded as I watched my father's kid brother wrestle my brazen best friend into submission. "You're believing a lie, Thorn," Noah snapped, as he pressed Teagan against the wall. "
Dammit, stop fucking biting me
!"

"I loved you," I heard Teagan whisper, almost begrudgingly, and my heart broke for her. "I
loved
you, Noah."

But I didn't hear Noah's response, as the alcohol in my veins and the exhaustion in my heart dragged me under …

****

From the age of eighteen I had a plan – leave Colorado and never return.

Up until twenty-four hours ago my plan had been unfolding beautifully. The space I had managed to put between my past mistakes – Jordan – and the person I was now had saved my life and sparked to life a career in writing that I wasn’t sure I would have pursued had I remained in Colorado.

Yet one phone call from my mother had brought me back there, standing in the middle of the airport to be exact, almost choking to death on all my past mistakes. After thirteen long hours of travelling with the hangover from
hell
, I finally set foot on Colorado soil again, and every memory I'd forced to the back of my mind impaled my heart.

Lowering my sunglasses to cover my red-rimmed eyes, I inhaled deeply, collected my suitcase from Luggage, and, with my worse-for-wear brother in tow, headed outside to the drop off area.

Colton and I both looked like shit, having slept less than three hours between us, but at least we were together.

"Not so fast," Colt grumbled, as he wobbled beside me. "The ground is still spinning."

"That would be the Jaeger Bombs," I chuckled, as I walked through the revolving glass doors of the airport. "You'll survive."

"I might," Colt agreed, grabbing my arm quickly in a bid to stay upright. "But I can't say the same for Teagan. Noah looked mad as hell when I swung by to pick you up …"

"I'm too hung over to worry about those two, Colt." I wrapped my arm around his shoulder to stop him from falling on his ass.

Baby brother was a lightweight …

"
Do a shot, Colton
," he groused, as he attempted to steady himself. "It'll be
fine
, Colton. You forgot to warn me about the possibility of losing my fucking balance."

The retort I was about to make died on the tip of my tongue as my eyes locked on the shiny, black Range Rover pulling up on the curb in front of us. The driver's door flew open and a pair of piercing blue eyes greeted me.

"Angel."

My face broke out in a huge smile the second my eyes fastened on my father, leaning against the hood of his car, dressed in a finely-cut black suit, with his arms folded across his chest and his head tilted to one side.

I hadn’t realized I'd missed him so much.

I couldn’t help myself. I squealed "Daddy," and ran towards him. He caught me easily and enveloped me in one of those
nothing-can-harm-me-he's-got-me
hugs.

"Jesus, I've missed you," Dad husked, setting me back on my feet. He locked his blindingly-blue eyes on my face. "You doing okay?"

"Everything's fine," I said, patting his shoulder. "Well, apart from the douche you sent me."

"
Daddy
," Colt cried out in a mocking tone, shoving me out of the way and grabbing our father in a bear hug. "I've missed you
so
much."

Dad laughed, and I was sure he enjoyed Colt's playful nature. "We've talked about this, Colt," Dad taunted. "Five second delay."

"Have we time to go home and change before going to the hotel?" I asked my father when we were sitting in his truck on the way back towards The Hill. I was dressed in jeans and a hoodie – hardly formal party attire.

Dad took a quick glance at his wristwatch before letting out a sigh.

"You got a dress in your case?" he asked, as he ran a hand through his thick dark hair and used the other to steer, eyes locked on the windshield.

"Yeah," I started to say. "But …"

"Then you can get dressed in one of the suites at the hotel," Dad replied. "Your mother will have my balls if I don’t get you there on time," he added in a petulant tone, before pulling at his tie. "That woman can be bossy as hell when she wants to be."

"Sure she can," I responded dryly, barely refraining from rolling my eyes to heaven.

****

Jordan

"Are you excited to see your family tonight?" Annabelle asked me and I smiled.

I smiled and lied through my teeth.

"Sure I am," I told her, pressing a kiss to her brow.

Coming back here was a mistake. I knew it. I just couldn’t do a damn thing to change it. My hands were tied, damn it.

Every instinct in my body was demanding I get the hell out of this place – to fucking run.

But I had been running for seven years and being on the road was tiring.

Besides, I owed this to Lee.

I just had to suck it up and make it through the next three hours.

****

Hope

He was here.

With a woman.

He came to my parents' anniversary party with a fucking woman.

A beautiful woman.

I couldn’t breathe.

I didn’t want to.

The tension in the room was palpable and I had to admit the only reason I wasn’t running for the hills was because of the six-inch stilettos on my feet and the firm hold Colton had on my arm.

"Ignore him," Colt whispered gently, guiding me further away from the
pair.
"She's barely a three."

I closed my eyes and fought back my tears, allowing my brother to lead me away. "A three?"

"Yeah, and that's out of one hundred." Colton sighed heavily and threw his arm over my shoulder, tucking me under his arm. "Don't sweat it, Hope, you've got the edge on her plastic ass."

"Gee, thanks," I muttered, allowing Colton to lead me over to where our other brothers were lounging near the bar, surrounded by a flock of beautiful women.

I was tall for a woman at 5'9", but my brothers were huge. Clocking in at 6'2", all three boys towered over me. We all shared the same dark hair and blue eyes, except for Logan, who got Mom's gray eyes.

"Well, look what the horse dragged in," Cam mused.

Colt was the horse; I was the 'what'.

"Looking shit, sis," Cam said with a smirk. "And wider," he added.

I merely raised my middle finger at Cam in response, but my stupid damn eyes kept filling with tears.

"What the fuck, Cam," Logan said in a weary tone. "Put a filter on it, douchebag."

Cam sobered his features quickly when he noticed my tears, and jumped off the bar stool he was sitting on.

"You're not wide," he rambled, clearly flustered. "You're skinny. I'm wide. And stupid. You know I didn’t mean that. I was talking shit … you know I have a problem with my mouth. Shit, I'm an asshole," he said, stopping in front of me.

"Jesus, Hope," Cameron groaned, lifting my chin with his hand. "Don’t waste your tears on an asshole like me."

In a rare act of tenderness, Cameron pulled me into his arms and squeezed me tightly. "Be sure that the man who makes you cry is worth the pain," he said quietly. "I'm not."

"She's not crying over you," Logan hissed as he flanked me, his eyes locked on the opposite side of the room. "Our sister is crying because of that ignorant piece of shit over there groping that mediocre-looking blonde."

"I'll fucking kill him," Cam snarled, before turning on his heel and storming off in the direction of my worst nightmare.

With my shoulders slumped, I trudged over to barstool Cam had vacated and hoisted myself onto it, watching in horror as my brother stalked across the foyer towards where Jordan was mingling.

"I see he's still as bad-tempered," I grumbled, watching Cameron having a heated discussion with Jordan across the room. "What an idiot."

Colt stared at me like I'd grown an extra head. "Cam's trying to defend you," he said slowly.

"He needs to feel like he's doing something," Logan interrupted calmly, leaning against the bar beside me. "You know how Cam gets."

Shaking his head, Logan ran his hand through his thick dark hair and exhaled slowly. "Things have been … hard for Cameron," he said quietly and in a weirdly serious tone. "Shit's been going down like you wouldn’t believe."

"Low," Colt snapped, clearing his throat, eyes locked on Logan. "Are you gonna stop him or am I?"

"Give him a few minutes," Logan replied calmly, nodding towards where Jordan and Cameron were most definitely having words. "He needs the release."

"I need to get out of here," I told my brothers. This was all too much for me. Hell, I should have never come back for this stupid party.

Climbing off the barstool, I pushed my way through the throngs of people celebrating my parents' relationship and I could have cried out in relief when I reached the elevators.

"Hope."

The deep gravelly timbre of his voice shook my resolve. I had to force down the emotions that came from hearing that name on his lips.

"Jordan," I acknowledged, as I continued pressing the button on the wall beside the elevator. Thankfully, the doors slid open and I hurried inside.

The strong hand that clamped my arm halted my escape and shook me to my very core.

"Let go," I said in a quiet, but no-nonsense tone of voice. My teeth were threatening to chatter so I bit down hard on my lips and tried to tug my arm free.

"Now."

Jordan didn’t let go. Instead, he stepped into the elevator, the scent of him overpowering me, making me drunk. "Give me five minutes," he said, as he the elevator doors closed, trapping me inside with the man who broke my goddamn heart. "And then I'll let you go."

"You let me go years ago," I shot back stiffly, pulling free, my hackles standing. The elevator descended quickly, causing my stomach to flip. "But I'll hear you out."

"Not here," was all Jordan said, and the next thing I knew the elevator doors had opened and I was being dragged through the basement floor of my father's hotel. Of course, I didn’t need to ask Jordan where we were going. I already knew.

The pool.

"This must be a new thing for you," I said cattily, as Jordan switched on the lights in the pool room and gestured me in. "Having to force a girl to go somewhere with you."

"I didn’t force you, Hope," he replied quietly from behind me – too close behind me. "And this was long overdue."

"I'm not interested in hearing what you have to say," I shot back, as I stood at the edge of the pool, looking down at the stillness of the water.

Sitting down on the floor, I removed my sandals, before sinking my toes into the water, feeling desperately drawn to Jordan as always. I knew he was bad for me, the bastard basically broke me seven years ago, but I sure as hell was a glutton for punishment because a part of me
wanted
to be here with him … How messed up was that?

"I know you're not interested," I heard Jordan say. His footsteps echoed to my left moments before he sat next to me.

"And I know why. I'm sorry."

"Fine," I replied coldly. "You're sorry. Good for you. Is that it?"

"Is it not enough?" he asked softly.

Damn it, I could never understand what he was thinking – what he meant with these short sentences.

"Who's the girl?" I said, mentally cringing, and feeling furious with myself for asking the one question I'd swore I wouldn’t ask him.

"Her name's Annabelle," he replied. "She's my girlfriend," he added after a long pause.

Ouch … cut me fucking to the bone.

"That's nice," I managed to say, though I had no idea how. "Annabelle and Jordan.
Cute
."

Jordan flinched. "Don't, Keychain."

"When's the wedding?" I snapped. "Sure looked like a dazzler of a ring on her finger."

"It's not …" He stopped, pinched the bridge of his nose, and shrugged his shoulders.

"I need to cool down."

Standing up, he peeled off his dress shirt and pants, kicked off his shoes and socks before diving into the pool.

I remained frozen, riveted to the spot, as I watched him flex muscles on his body as he swam to the surface that hadn’t been there seven years ago.

"May," he said finally, as he pushed his wet hair off his face and waded towards me. "The tenth."

Son of a bitch …

He looked at me apologetically as if he knew it would upset me to find out he was planning to get married on my birthday.

"Next year," he added quietly.

Rub salt in my wounds, asshole …

"Huh," I growled in a fake-as-fuck voice.

Pulling myself to my feet, I glared down at him.

"Getting married on my birthday. That's pretty tasteless, Jordan," I said, my voice laced with anger as I backed away from him, before turning around and stalking off towards the door.

I heard the sound of water splashing seconds before the words, "I'm sorry," penetrated my eardrums.

"You should be," I hissed, swinging around to face him. Jordan was already staring down at me, his green eyes locked on my face.

"I suppose I should leave my forwarding address with you."

Jordan stared blankly at me, and I shook my head in disgust. "You know, for my invitation," I told him sweetly. "Oh, and the divorce papers you'll need me to sign."

Jordan paled, and I swallowed the huge lump in my throat.

"The annulment papers," he said slowly. "I signed them. You were supposed to …"

"Our marriage was
consummated
, Jordan," I spat, interrupting his denial, hurting all over to think being married to me made him feel so sick. "If you want a new Mrs. Porter you're going to have to get rid of the old one first."

****