BUCKED Box Set: A Bull Rider Western Romance (62 page)

Now I was even more confused than before.

I didn’t sleep well that night and when
school came around the next day, I couldn’t believe how weird literally
everything felt to me.

It wasn’t just that I was trying to avoid
Shawn at all costs. It was also because, what had happened the night before had
completely changed every perception I had ever had about the relationship that
was culminated, literally for mine and Shawn’s entire life.

At first, it was always wonder. I always
had the idea that he liked me about as much as I liked him, but I was never
brave enough to find out. Then, when I did finally break it to him, he rejected
me harshly.

Due to that, the sanctity of our
friendship was cracked and what I thought could be a possibility for a
meaningful relationship was completely shattered.

That was the last thing I ever wanted for
him and I, but that was what happened and I knew that because of it, things
would never be the same.

For two long years I lived with that,
trying to repair our relationship, only to watch it splinter; until last night,
when I thought it had completely shattered, only to realize that I was right
all along.

I knew I should be happy with that and I
knew that I should have jumped at the chance to be with him, before he went and
changed his mind again. Part of me thought that if things had played out
differently, he would have come home and not only would I have gotten what has
now become the closest thing to a lifelong dream that I had ever had, I would
also be the hero for bringing him home.

It would have been perfect, because my
parents would have just been so happy to see him and have him back, that they
wouldn’t have even asked questions. We could have gotten away with pretty much
anything.

Alas, I had reacted based entirely on how
I felt and that had turned out to be incredibly wrong, which in turn made my
whole reality exceptionally strange.

Eventually, I turned to the one constant
that I had in my life, who was totally removed from my strange family: Zachary.

When I saw him standing by his locker, I
smiled, thinking about the happiness he brought me.

Another strange thing about today was the
fact that Zachary had not picked me up. He said that he had homework to do and
therefore, he was going to get a ride into school.

That wasn’t too abnormal though, so I had
no problem walking up to him and starting a conversation.

“Hey, Zachary,” I said cheerfully, trying
to leave my baggage behind me for the moment. “Did you finish your homework?”

“What?” He asked and then looked at me
with a strange expression before he shook his head. “Oh…hi Valerie…Yeah, I
did.” He smiled at me, but in my opinion, it looked incredibly forced.

I wasn’t sure why he was acting so strangely,
but in a way, I figured that it was really none of my business. Afterward, he
seemed all right and even walked me home as he normally did.

So I chalked his weird reaction to me
coming up to him randomly this morning as just another way in which that day
had turned out to be weird.

Maybe
it’s a full moon,
I thought, but really didn’t give much
more merit to the reason behind the day at all. Eventually, I just figured it
was all in my head.

After all, there was plenty going on with
me, but there was no external reason for anything to be strange with anyone
else, especially Zachary.
Right?

Chapter
16

Shawn

I wasn’t sure what I was doing here. I
didn’t want to be here. I knew that, but where I really wanted to be, I wasn’t
welcome anymore, probably by anyone.

Therefore, I found myself here, on
Dalilah’s front stoop, trying to think of reasons to get her to give me another
chance, while also trying to escape another slap to the face.

Even though a few days had gone by, I was
still fairly unsure of exactly what had happened that night.

There was definitely something going on
between Valerie and I, but that was likely to never happen again. Then I was
the one who Dalilah decided to stalk and I still ended up being the bad guy.

How
did that work out?

I might not have been able to come up with
any plausible answer, but still, after a few long days of the silent treatment,
especially given my family situation, I could certainly use a friend. At this
point, I cared very little about where that friend came from.

That was the ultimate decision that led me
here.

My mother didn’t care about me and I
couldn’t face Valerie, at least not yet and certainly not to talk about us, or
me and Dalilah.

I felt similarly about my stepmother at
the moment and so, that only left Dalilah; which was sad in and of itself, but
at least I still had one person.

That is, if she ever answered the door.

I felt slightly impatient and antsy. I was
scared that she would turn me away, just like everyone else had; and even she
herself had a few days before, but in lieu of going crazy, I decided that I had
to try.

I knocked on the door again and once more
fell into my waiting stance. I shuffled the imaginary dirt with my foot and
looked down a lot, trying my best to look sorry, just in case she was peering
through the peephole, deliberating about answering the door.

She made me wait quite a while, but when
she finally answered the door, her face was anything but pleasant. “What do you
want?”

“Hi Dalilah…” I answered carefully,
smiling disarmingly.

“What do you want?” she repeated
brusquely.

“I want to talk to you.”

“About what? Because if you are not
willing to talk to me about what really happened the other night, then I have
no interest.”

I felt my shoulders lower and I sighed
before I threw my hands out, unable to hide the fact that I was angry. “Really,
Dalilah? Do we have to talk about this? Can’t we just forget it?”

“No,” she answered simply and moved to
slam the door once again.

Without thinking, I put my hand in the way
and stopped the door before I insisted
 
toward her shocked expression, “Listen, absolutely nothing happened!”

“Then why won’t you just tell me?” she
demanded, which caused me to sigh.

I realized then that if I was going to
make this plan work, I was going to have to put aside my foolish sense of
pride, which told me that it was none of her business what we were talking
about and give her an explanation that she might be able to understand. I bowed
my head and looked down at the ground. I kicked the invisible dirt again and
sighed. “Um… It’s my mother…Well, my stepmother. She isn’t well. Valerie knows
how close we are and so, despite our current feud, she wanted to tell me in
person what was going on with her, so that I was aware.”

It was a boldface lie, but what other choice
did I have? I shrugged and stared back up at her, trying to find the pity in
her eyes.

She was quiet for a long time, until
finally she answered. “Oh…I’m sorry.”

“Yeah…” I answered, “So, I would
appreciate it if you didn’t say anything to anyone. None of us really wants
that to get out.”

“What’s the matter with her?” Dalilah
asked briskly.

I shrugged again. “That’s the weird part;
the doctors have no idea.”

Dalilah was silent for a moment and then,
she asked carefully, “Is she…okay?”

“I hope so,” I answered, now feeling
slightly guilty for what I was saying about Valerie’s mother. But that was the
best explanation that I could come up with, besides the truth as to why two
estranged friends would be meeting like we did and staying as close as we were
to one another. She seemed to respond well to it.

She nodded and even gave me a hug. “I’m
really sorry. I know that you two are close…”

I waited, but for once there was no snide
comment or snicker in her tone. She just spoke normally to me, as though she really
did have a heart that wasn’t always overpassed by her brain in order to get
something that she really wanted.

This was probably a ploy and I accepted
that. In fact, I was fairly certain that somehow, this would likely come back
to haunt me. But I still didn’t want that idea to ruin the feeling that I was
getting; the illusion that she was actually caring about my feelings, instead
of just herself.

I had to do a lot of that lately, but my
biological mother had always and continued to give me good practice, so I had
learned well. At the very least, my mother gave me that.

I nodded “Yeah…Thank you.”

“Well, if you need anything…or want to
talk, even though I know that you probably don’t, but if you do, I am here for
you.”

“Thanks…”

“And don’t worry about a thing.” She
smiled at me. “Your secret is safe with me. Unlike everyone else that you seem
to have in your life, I would never betray your trust.”

I stared at her strangely for a moment
before I tried to figure out what she meant by that. I wasn’t sure though and
so, once again, I simply opted to take her at her word.
 
I smiled and pretended, at least for the
moment, that nothing negative was going to come out of this experience. I
pretended that she was really a person who cared for me and respected my wishes.

Deep down, I knew that wasn’t true, but
like a lot of things in my life, I decided that “here’s to hoping” was the only
way I was ever going to find true peace, even if it was only for a moment.

Even still, that moment passed rather
quickly, when she, apparently deciding that we had mourned for enough time,
said, “So, what do you want to do today?”

At first, I was slightly taken aback at
her brusqueness, but then I remembered, not only was that just the way Dalilah
always was, but I was also basing our entire interaction on a lie. So it
probably didn’t really matter how she reacted to it.

At
least she’s reliably crazy and careless with feelings,
I thought to myself as I smiled, happy to have gotten at least one person back
in my corner.

“I’m kind of hungry…” I mentioned,
realizing now that I was so distraught over the past few days that I hadn’t
eaten much.

“Sure. You can take me to that new hibachi
grill.”

“What? Isn’t that place expensive?” I
demanded, slightly shocked. “I don’t have…”

She interrupted me immediately. “You never
tell a girl that you don’t have the ability to fulfill her desires, in any
capacity. That is strictly for her to decide.” She smiled in more of a devilish
way. “I’ll be ready in five minutes.”

Chapter
17

Valerie

About halfway through the school day, I
saw Dalilah coming up to me. I was surprised to see her in school. Most days,
she cut class and urged Shawn to do the same; yet another reason why I simply
couldn’t stand her.

However, after the last time we had
talked, the fact that she was heading straight toward me made me wish that she
wasn’t in school anymore. After all, I would not want to be the source of her
anger, at least to the capacity that she would try anything. She had been in
plenty of fights before and I had seen her be pretty rough on Shawn as well.
And while I wasn’t afraid of her, I also didn’t want to get suspended over the
likes of Dalilah.

The really sad thing was though, part of
me was afraid of what I might find out about Shawn if she ever did start anything
with me. Would Shawn come to my aid, or would he side with his girlfriend? I
really didn’t want to find out.

Therefore, seeing her barreling toward me
like a bull, practically mowing down students as she walked, I wanted to run.
In fact, I almost did turn around and bolt down another hallway, knowing that
no interaction with this woman was ever going to be a pleasant one.

But before I could do that, I heard her
call my name, loud enough that if I did turn around and run, it would be far
too obvious. I sighed, trying not to let her see me roll my eyes. “Hi Dalilah.”

“Hey…” She answered, almost as though we
were old friends. I knew that couldn’t be good. When she got a little closer to
me, she lowered her voice. “I just wanted to let you know that we’re cool.”

“Oh…okay. Great,” I answered, even though
in the back of my mind all I could think of was,
No, we most certainly are not. Until you stop brainwashing my friend
into being with you, we are certainly not cool…
Although, I figured that a
ceasefire between me and Dalilah could only help the odd relationship that I
was trying to have with Shawn, so I just smiled.

“I…um…I heard about your mother,” Dalilah
answered, as though she was truly concerned.

I was thoroughly confused. “Well, I
didn’t…” I said before I could stop myself, “What about her?”

Dalilah looked confused right back for a
moment before she answered, “It’s okay. Shawn told me what happened. He told me
that your mother is sick and that you were talking to him about it the other
night.” She smiled. “You’re a good friend; keeping him in the loop, even though
you aren’t talking to him.”