Catia (Starkis Family #6) (8 page)

He popped a bite of scrambled egg into his mouth before tilting his head and studying me. “I don’t know yet. It’s too soon to say. I think you believe you have. But old habits die hard, right? Who’s to say you’re not going to revert back to your old ways?”

“Why would I want to?” I cut my French toast before popping a raspberry and blueberry into my mouth. “I’m happy now. I wasn’t then.”

He looked doubtful. “You weren’t happy with the single life? That was never the impression I got, Cat. I assumed you loved the single life—that’s why you didn’t want to get tied down.”

“That was true.” I took a minute to enjoy my breakfast as I considered my response. I knew this was the conversation I’d hoped to have with Chase, so I couldn’t afford to screw this up and plant more doubts in his mind. “I looked forward to getting back to Chicago, my work, my friends, my home, but when I got there, I realized it wasn’t as great as I remembered.”

“How so?”

“I thought dating would make me forget you, so I tried it. Every experience was worse than the last.” I tried to suppress my smile when I said, “And those were my A-list guys.”

“Your A-list guys?” he asked, scowling. “What the hell does that mean? You rate them? Please tell me it’s not based on sexual performance.” I kicked him under the table and laughed when he said, “Ow!”

“I haven’t even slept with most of them. Those were just the ones I’d call when I wanted to have a good time. They were fun, no strings attached, ya know?”

“I guess,” he said, digging into his breakfast as though he needed the distraction.

“But spending time with them only made me miss you more.” I waited until he looked at me before I added, “So I stopped wasting my time going out with them and started spending it more productively, getting to know myself better.”

“How’d you do that?”

I was still cautiously optimistic, but I could almost see his walls coming down. “I started reading a lot more. Books that helped me figure out who I was and wanted I wanted.”

He smirked. “You don’t seem like the type to read self-help books.”

Ignoring the barb, I continued. “I started figuring out the things that brought me joy, and that meant spending less time partying with my friends. I didn’t need that anymore. It had served a purpose when I was younger, but now I’d much rather meet a friend for dinner or a coffee.”

“Interesting.” He chewed his toast slowly as he regarded me carefully.

“And I started spending a lot more time alone. And you know what? I liked it.” I laughed self-consciously. “I used to hate hanging out at home with nothing to do. I’d get lonely, so I’d have the TV or music blaring just to hear voices. By the time I left Chicago, I had a whole list of things I liked to do when I was home alone.”

“This I gotta hear.”

He may have been teasing me, but as long as he was willing to listen, I was open to sharing. “Like I said, I read more. I even took a cooking class. My parents always implied no man would want a wife who couldn’t boil water, so I refused to learn, just to spite them. But I eventually realized I was interested in learning and refusing to do so because of them was silly and juvenile, so I learned to cook and even bake a little.”

His jaw dropped. Obviously he remembered my vow to live off of someone else’s cooking for the rest of my life. “Really?”

“Yeah.” I enjoyed the fact that I’d shocked him. It proved he didn’t know me as well as he thought he did, and in this case, that was a good thing. I wanted to erase his memory of the old Catia and introduce him to the new and improved version I’d been cultivating. “I don’t want you to think I changed for you. I did this for myself because when I went home, I wasn’t happy with life as I knew it anymore.”

“I respect your willingness to change. Most people would rather stay stuck in lives that don’t please them than risk change.”

I nodded, turning his comment over and over in my head. “I know myself a lot better now than I did then, but I’m still learning and growing. Hopefully that will never stop.” At the question in his eyes, I explained, “There are things I’ve always wanted to do and haven’t yet.”

He chuckled. “I can’t imagine what that might be. You seem like the type of woman who’d risk her neck for a thrill.”

“I’m not talking about a five-minute thrill,” I said, thinking about some of the daring stunts I’d pulled in my twenties. “I’m talking about committing to something hard—learning, failing, and trying again until I get better. Like the piano. I’ve always wanted to learn, so I bought a piano for the new house. I’m looking for a teacher so I can start taking lessons.”

“Really?” he asked, sounding surprised. “My mother teaches piano. The girls take lessons with her. She’s basically retired now, but if you’re serious, I could ask her whether she’d be willing to work with you.”

The fact that Chase was willing to introduce me to his mother was a huge step, even if it was for professional reasons, and I didn’t want to miss out on the opportunity. “I’d love that. If you don’t think she’d mind.”

“Are you kidding? Piano is her passion. Too bad it’s like pulling teeth to get my girls to practice.”

“I was like that as a kid,” I said, polishing off my now-lukewarm breakfast. “My parents thought it was important we learn to play. Kara didn’t mind because, let’s face it, she’s the good daughter. But I was the headstrong one. I didn’t want to do anything for the sake of pleasing my parents.”

He shook his head before offering me a wry smile. “I have two girls like you. How the hell am I going to survive?”

“I can give you some pointers,” I said, smiling. “You know, from a reformed bad girl.”

“I guess if there’s hope for you, there’s hope for them.”

And maybe, just maybe, there was hope for us.

Chase

I passed by my parents’ place on Monday at lunchtime. I couldn’t get my breakfast conversation with Catia out of my head, and I wanted to talk to my mother to see if she might be willing to take on a new student as a favor to me.

“Oh hey, honey,” my mom said, meeting me at the front door. “This is a nice surprise. Have you had lunch?”

“No, I can grab something later.”

“Nonsense, I have a loaf of bread coming out of the oven.” She reached for my hand. “Come. I’ll make you a sandwich.”

I would never have gotten through the past couple of years without my parents. While I’d taken care of them financially when my ship came in, I didn’t think I told them often enough how much I appreciated their help with the girls.

“What brings you by?” she asked, stacking homemade roast beef on bread before adding my favorite toppings.

“I wanted to ask you something, but first I want to say thank you.” I was leaning against the counter, facing her, my arms and legs crossed.

“For what?”

“Being so amazing.”

Her cheeks flushed as she shook her head. “You’re being silly. Where is this coming from?”

“Maybe it’s the fact that the girls have been giving me a run for my money lately. Makes me realize I didn’t always make life easy for you and Dad when I was growing up.”

“No, you didn’t,” she admitted, shaking her head. “But that was your job. You were a kid trying to figure things out, trying to make your own way in the world. That’s what you were supposed to do. Dad and I knew that.”

“And that’s what Elsie and Em are doing? Just trying to figure things out?” I knew with my mother, her musings always came with a not-so-subtle message.

“Sure, but they’re just babies.”

“Who are going through a hard time,” I said, sighing. “I just have to be patient, right?”

“You got it,” she said, patting my cheek and giving me a warm smile. “No one ever said being a parent was easy. But I don’t think I have to tell you the rewards more than make up for all the grief they’ll cause you.”

“No, you don’t.” I glanced out the window and noticed the door to my old man’s shop was closed. “Where’s Dad?”

“He went out for a walk before lunch. The doctor told him he should try to do that every day, you know, because of the high blood pressure and cholesterol.”

“How’s that going, by the way?” I asked, sitting at the table when my mother set my plate and hers down. “Are the meds helping?”

“They sure are.” She winked. “Now, if only I could stop baking this stuff.” She broke off a warm piece of bread and popped it in her mouth. “I know I shouldn’t, but I just can’t seem to help myself. And you know your dad has no willpower. When I bake it, he eats it.”

A vision of Catia popped into my head. Maybe I could blame lack of willpower on heredity. “I wanted to ask you a favor.” I moaned after I tasted a bite of the sandwich. Damn, that was good.

“Sure, anything.”

“I have a friend who’s interested in taking piano lessons. She has her own piano, so I’m assuming the lessons would be at her place at least some of the time. She lives across the street from me actually.”

“Oh, that’s nice,” she said, offering me a plate of her homemade dill pickles. “A neighbor of yours?”

“Actually, she was a friend before she was a neighbor. A business associate, really. At least it started out that way.” When my mother looked at me intently, I took a huge bite, taking my time to chew. Babbling was unlike me, so naturally I’d piqued my mother’s curiosity.

“This wouldn’t be the girl you worked with last fall, would it?”

“Yeah, as a matter of fact, it is.” I reached for my water, hoping she would let it go at that.

“I thought she moved back to Chicago before the project was even finished? You said you had to bring one of your own project managers in to pick up the slack.”

“Yeah, well, she left, and now she’s back.” My mother didn’t normally pry, but I could tell she wasn’t ready to let this go. “She’s working for me, in fact. Wendy hired her.”

“Without your knowledge?” my mother asked, frowning. “That doesn’t sound like her.”

My mother and Wendy had developed a friendship over the years since my mother often popped into the office with fresh baked goods for my staff. Since she and Wendy were about the same age and had a lot in common, they sometimes went out to lunch or coffee to chat about their families and shared hobbies.

“I guess she knew what she was doing.” I hated to admit it, but given how much happier I’d been in the short time since Cat’s return, I suspected my employee knew better than I did about what was best for me. “There’s no denying Catia’s qualified, maybe even overqualified, for the job.”

She took a bite of her sandwich. “I thought you tried to avoid hiring people who were overqualified. You always said they’d leave just as soon as something better came along.”

The thought of Catia leaving me for something or
someone
better had me choking on my water.

My mother rested her hand on my arm. “This girl means a lot to you, doesn’t she?”

When I’d finally caught my breath, I said, “Yeah, I guess she does.”

“I don’t mean to pry, but are you sure this is the right time for you to think about a relationship? Especially with a woman who’s proven to be a little fickle?”

“No, I’m not sure of anything right now to be honest. That’s why I’m trying to take it slow with her. She claims she’s changed, that she’s ready to settle down. I really want to believe her, but I can’t be too careful. I have the girls to think about, and after what went down with Cat the last time…” I shook my head. “I just don’t wanna get burned again.”

“You didn’t come right out and say it, but I knew she was the reason you went through that period of depression last year. I’d never seen you like that,” she said, touching my shoulder. “Not even after you found out Karen cheated on you.”

“I guess Catia meant a lot more to me than I realized at the time.”

“You were in love with her?”

I washed down the lump in my throat with a sip of water. “Yeah, I was.”

“And now?”

“I’m not sure.” I knew how I felt when I was with her—like nothing and no one else mattered—but I wasn’t ready to label that love again.

“Well, take your time. There’s no rush to decide anything right now, is there?”

“No, I guess not.” According to Cat, she wasn’t going anywhere. “So you’ll work with her?” I asked, remembering the reason for my visit.

“Of course, it would be my pleasure,” my mother said, her eyes lighting up with enthusiasm. “Can you give me her number? I’ll call later today to set up the appointment.”

“Sounds good.” My mother had had very strong opinions about Karen the first time she met her. She’d labelled her a troublemaker and told me I’d be wise to steer clear of her. Of course, I was a rebellious teenager who had no intention of doing anything his parents told him to.

But I was a grown man now with a lot more respect for my parents’ opinions than I’d had then. I just hoped my mother wouldn’t see the same characteristics in Catia that made her dislike Karen so intensely.

***

I was stunned when shortly after bringing the girls home from my parents’, Catia showed up on my doorstep with a plate of cookies.

“Hey,” she said, looking uncertain. Her attire was casual—black leggings and a tunic with ballerina flats—but she had a way of making even that look sexy.

“Hey, yourself,” I said, partially closing the door when the sound of the girls’ cartoon filtered outside. “What are you doing here?”

In spite of her olive complexion, a blush rose in her cheeks. “Um, I’m sorry for just showing up like this. I know I should have called first, but I decided to bake some cookies and thought you and the girls might like some.” She thrust the plate at me as though she had to prove her intent. “I also wanted to thank you for talking to your mother about the piano lessons. She’s coming over later for my first one.”

“Wow, she doesn’t waste any time, does she?” I suspected she was anxious to meet the woman she’d heard so much about so she could evaluate her character for herself without hearing it second-hand from her son. “I hope she wasn’t too pushy?”

“No, she seems lovely,” Catia said, smiling. “I’m anxious to meet her. I just hope I don’t embarrass myself. It occurred to me, a little too late, that I should have practiced on my own before bringing in someone experienced to watch me make a fool of myself.”