Counseling Through Your Bible Handbook (40 page)

If this is so, you need to know…

Truth:
You have God-given value because you have a new residence in God’s kingdom and the
new clothing
of Christ.

— You are clothed with Christ (Galatians 3:27).

— You are baptized into Christ (Romans 6:4).

— You are hidden in Christ (Colossians 3:3).

— You are sealed with the Spirit of Christ (Ephesians 1:13-14).

— You are given the full armor of God (Ephesians 6:13-17).

Lie:
“My life has no value since I’ve done so many things wrong—my life is ruined.”

At times, do you feel like the “sorriest of sinners”? You think no one’s stack of wrongs could tower as high as yours.

God forgives…but you’re sure His grace has run out where you’re concerned. His arms are always open, but surely this time He’s turned His back. After all, you’ve confessed these same sins time and time and time again.

If this is so, you need to know…

Truth
: You have God-given value, for you’ve been given a
new life
in Jesus Christ.

— You are redeemed (Ephesians 1:7).

— You are washed (1 Corinthians 6:11).

— You are purified (1 John 1:7).

— You are justified (Romans 5:1).

— You are sanctified (1 Corinthians 6:11).

Lie:
“My life has value as long as I can look good to others.”

At times, do you hope and pray that no one finds “this” out? Even if it happened long ago, if people knew what you did, any respect would be erased.

Do you have “pockets of perfectionism” because of the pressure? People mustn’t find out about your struggles, faults, or shame. What other people think means everything to you.

If this is so, you need to know…

Truth:
You have God-given value even though you have fallen in the past and may stumble in the future. He has given you a
new image
.

— You are totally accepted by Christ (Romans 15:7).

— You are totally blameless before Christ (Colossians 1:22).

— You are totally righteous in Christ (2 Corinthians 5:21).

— You are totally complete in Christ (Colossians 2:9-10).

— You are totally perfect (meaning “mature” in the original Greek text—not flawless) because of Christ (Hebrews 10:14).

Lie:
“My life has no value because I have failed and deserve to be punished.”

At times, do you feel you don’t deserve forgiveness? Mercy is for other people, not for you. You’ve failed so many times…
you are a failure
.

Punishment, a penalized life, and a painful future all await you. God can bring good out of a lot of things, but not this miserable mess. Furthermore, why would He care? Surely His love has been lost.

If this is so, you need to know…

Truth:
You have God-given value based not on your past performance but on Christ, who lives in you and who gives you
freedom
from condemnation.

— You are free from accusation (Colossians 1:22).

— You are free from condemnation (Romans 8:1).

— You are free from the law (Romans 7:4).

— You are free from sin (Romans 6:11).

— You are free from God’s wrath (Romans 5:9).

Lie:
“My life has no value if I do not succeed financially and leave a comfortable inheritance.”

At times, do you feel that success is measured only in dollars and cents? When the bank account heads south, does your self-image trail behind? You work…work…work…seven days a week, providing what is needed, but needing to protect your self-image.

You’re driven to provide, driven to bear all the burdens alone.

If this is so, you need to know…

Truth:
You have God-given value because you’ve been given a
new inheritance
that provides the only true and lasting significance and security possible.

— You have been made an heir of God (Galatians 4:7).

— You have inherited everything needed to be godly (1 Peter 1:3).

— You are a partner of the divine nature (2 Peter 1:4).

— You have inherited every spiritual blessing (Ephesians 1:3).

— You have inherited eternal life (John 3:16).

What is your true identity?
If the
real you
has “
Christ in you
,” the
visible you
reflects Christ
through
you.

—JH

1 John 3:1

Ephesians 1:5

Psalm 27:10

1 Peter 1:3

1 Corinthians 6:11

2 Corinthians 5:17

Colossians 1:22

1 Corinthians 6:19-20

2 Corinthians 5:20

Matthew 5:14-16

For additional guidance on this topic, see also
Alcohol and Drug Abuse, Childhood Sexual Abuse, Codependency, Critical Spirit, Cults, Depression, Dysfunctional Family, Evil and Suffering…Why?, Fear, Forgiveness, Guilt, Homosexuality, Hope, Prejudice, Rejection, Salvation, Self-worth, Stress Management, Suicide Prevention, Victimization, Worry
.

C
hronic
and
terminal
are two words no one wants to hear in association with illness. A person with chronic illness suffers physically and can face a lifetime of persistent pain. Terminal illness is a physical sickness with the prognosis that life expectancy will be less than a year, although patients can live longer. Both can be debilitating ditches physically and emotionally, with constrained activities and strained relationships. Spiritual vitality too can diminish, with plaintive cries of “Why me?” In the midst of suffering God longs to bring peace, with the promise of His presence now,
and for eternity
.

“All men are like grass, and all their glory is like the flowers of the field; the grass withers and the flowers fall”

(1 P
ETER
1:24).

“My soul is weary with sorrow; strengthen me according to your word”

(P
SALM
119:28).

Troubles are temporary, glory is eternal.

“Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal”

(2 C
ORINTHIANS
4:16-18).

Your physical body is designed to decay.

“Dust you are and to dust you will return”

(G
ENESIS
3:19).

Afflictions are allowed by God to teach you.

“It was good for me to be afflicted so that I might learn your decrees”

(P
SALM
119:71).

Suffering opens your eyes to see God.

“My ears had heard of you but now my eyes have seen you”

(J
OB
42:5)

Lives are conformed to the image of Christ through suffering.

“We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him…those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the likeness of his Son”

(R
OMANS
8:28-29).

Denial—avoiding painful reality

— “The test results are clearly wrong.”

— “I’m feeling much better…I’m sure I am improving.”

Anger—opening up honest emotions

— “Why has this happened to me?”

— “God is not fair!”

Bargaining
²
—attempting to change reality

— “I have not been a good person. I’ll change, and God will forgive me.”

— “If I have enough faith, God will miraculously heal me.”

Depression—feeling despair over the situation

— “I hate being so dependent on others.”

— “My life is over. I am useless to everyone.”

Acceptance—gaining a positive outlook

— “Lord, I choose to embrace Your grace on a daily basis, and to move from being a ‘victim’ of illness to being a victorious, shining testimony to Your sufficiency.”

— “I accept this circumstance as allowed by You for my good and Your glory” (see Ephesians 3:20-21).

God placed medicinal qualities within nature. You can certainly exercise faith in God and at the same time take medicine as prescribed. Ezekiel 47:12 states that God made “leaves for healing.”

Q:
I prayed with faith expecting God to heal me, but nothing happened.
What went wrong?

A:
God can heal anyone at any time in any way. However, many godly people of genuine faith do not receive physical healing. Pray for God’s will for your life as you seek emotional, psychological, and spiritual healing.
³
Honestly and openly experience each stage of sorrow, and know that in His time, God
will
heal your
heart
.
⁴

“He [God] heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds”

(P
SALM
147:3).

Typically it is best to tell the truth. While medical science is never the last word, and miracles
do
happen at times, most terminally ill patients instinctively know they are not getting well. Dishonesty and deception robs them of dignity and the motivation to get relationships and affairs in order before they die.