Grace Lost (28 page)

“I’ve always hated storms,” I
admitted as I sat.  “They freak me out.”

As I spoke, thunder sounded in the
distance, amplified by the echo effect of the mountains and valleys surrounding
us.  I must have jumped slightly because Boggs wrapped an arm around me
reassuringly.

“Sorry I wasn’t there when you
woke up,” said Boggs as he kissed the side of my head.  “When I came up
you were sound asleep.”

“We were just talking about
tomorrow,” said Emilie, changing the topic.  “We still have the bones from
the fire to deal with.”

I drew my feet up onto the couch
and nestled in against Boggs even harder.

“What can we do for Louisa?” I
asked quietly. 

I felt Boggs sigh and he tightened
his arm around me.  I laid my head on his chest.

“Just be there for her,” said Gus.

“Susan seems to really care about
her.  Maybe she’s ok after all,” I said, directly followed by a yawn.

Thunder sounded again, this time
sounding closer.  The wind continued to scream and rain beat against the
front of the cabin.  I was glad to be surrounded by friends and the warmth
from the fire.  I was glad to be home.

“
Winter
will be here before you know it,” said Gus.  “We need to prepare. 
The fireplace will help, but not enough.  We should be watching for a wood
stove to install, get wood cut, split, and curing, stock up on food.  Snow
will get deep here in the mountains.  I’m hoping most of what
we’ll need we
can scrounge up from abandoned homes. 
Gear for canning, warmer clothes and blankets.
”

I tried to focus on Gus’ voice
instead of the storm.

“Canning gear?” asked
Emilie.  “Great for next summer, but why get it now?”

Gus looked at her.  “We
’ll can
fish and any meat we hunt this winter,” he
answered.  “And who knows if we’ll be able to drive the roads next
summer.  We always need to think ahead, and get what we can now.”

“Makes sense,” she said.

Boggs picked up the
conversation.  I could feel his chest moving as he spoke.  “The step
van is going to use more gas than the Explorer.  It might be wise to do
scouting trips in the SUV, even though it’ll haul less per trip.”

My thoughts briefly wandered to
the man I had killed.  I didn’t want to think about what I had done, so
forced myself to listen to the conversation around me. 

“Agreed,” said Gus.  “I know
even talking about going back out is fucking tough.”

“It’s getting cold out,” said
Emilie.  “I don’t think we have a choice.  We have to.”

“I should go with,” I said with a lack
of enthusiasm.

“Are you sure you’re up to it?”
asked Boggs.

“I can help.”  I looked up at
Boggs.  “You know I can help warn you. 
At least
about the dead.
  Not so much the living.”  My vision got
blurry from welling tears.

“It wasn’t your fault, Zoe,” said
Emilie in a serious tone.

I wiped at my eyes with the back
of my arm.

“When will we go?” I asked.

“After the sun’s up,” answered
Gus.  “I want to leave the other girls behind, though.  Louisa needs
to stay put, and try to keep calm.”

“I should stay with her and
Susan,” said Emilie.  “They both seem like they’re pretty freaked.  I
honestly don’t want to separate from the three of you but I know it’s for the
best.”

I nodded, took a deep breath, and
sat upright.  “Ok.”

The sound of the rain intensified
as it turned to hail. 

“Boggs?”
I asked as quietly as I could.

“Ya, Zo?”

“How many days has it been now?”

He sighed heavily.  “I’ve
lost count. 
A couple weeks?”

“Tomorrow’s day eighteen,”
answered Gus.  “I’ve been keeping track.”

Emilie whistled softly. 
“Over two weeks? 
Already?”
  She snuggled up
against Gus.

“Yup,” he mumbled with a hint of
sadness. 
“That long.
  I’d like to have
enough supplies stocked up for winter within a week,” he continued. 
“We’ll drive the step van to the Explorer and start by getting it back
here.  We’ll take the gas in the bucket to the Explorer, add it, and
siphon the next car we come across once we’re on the road.”

“Are we going all the way back to
the wreck?” I asked.  “It seems so far.”

“We’ll head the other way,” said Boggs. 
“But if we go more than ten miles without seeing a source for gas we’ll need to
turn around.”

“How about siphoning from the step
van from the get-go?” asked
Emilie.

“Good idea, Red,” said Gus. 
“I just don’t want to waste any by transferring back and forth.  And I
want the step van drivable in case you girls need it while we’re gone.”

“Sounds good,” she said.

“Em, I’m hoping we’re back before
dark.  If we’re not, just stay inside and keep the door shut and
locked.  I had hoped to build a safe room before we leave, but we need to
get underway.  I want to leave you with my shotgun and Susan with
Julio’s.  I’ll go over both with you girls before we leave,” added Gus.

“What about you guys?” she asked.

I sat listening while Gus
continued.  “Boggs will keep the Kahr.  I’ll take the sawed-off
shotgun from the old guy with me.  I don’t want to leave it here with
Louisa.  It seems like bad karma.”  He looked over at me.  “Zoe,
I want you to bring the revolver you found.”

The thought of touching the small
gun again made my stomach turn, but good sense made me rise to the
occasion.  “No problem,” I said, being as strong as I could
..

“Good girl,” whispered Boggs as he
took my hand in his.

“Once the weather clears we need
to venture to Lake Arrow, see about catching some fish,” said Gus.

Em moaned gently.  “Fresh
food would be
so
good
.”

I turned toward the stairs when I
heard the subtle squeaking of someone walking down from the second story.

“Susan.  How’s Louisa?” asked
Gus.

“She’s still sleeping.  She’s
been tossing and turning a lot, crying out.  I’m not sure what else to do
for her.”

Susan looked tired.  She sat
on the arm of the couch where Boggs and I were situated and the men filled her
in on plans.  None of us were thrilled with the prospect of separating. 
The day promised to be emotionally trying.

I woke alone on the
loveseat.  My back was stiff from not being able to stretch on the cramped
sofa.  I could hear the others talking in the kitchen, and to my delight I
smelled coffee.  I stood and stretched, and followed the aroma to the
group at the table.

“Morning, Zo,” said Boggs.

“Morning,” I said back to
him.  “Where’d the coffee come from?”

“They brought it back with us last
night,” answered Susan.  “Grab a cup and come sit down.  I was just
headed up to check on Louisa.”

“Thanks,” I said. 

I took her seat and let Boggs
serve me a cup of coffee from a French press we had found a few days back in
our cabin’s own kitchen.

“There’s no creamer but we have a
can of condensed milk.  Want some?” asked Em.

I nodded my head. 
“Ya, sure.”

She scooped a spoonful of the
thick creamy substance into my mug and stirred it for me.  I gratefully
took the cup from her and sipped.  It was wonderfully warm, strong, sweet,
and soothing.

“I never knew you had to spoon
condensed milk,” I said absently.  The milk was thick like caramel.

Gus pushed his chair back and
stood.  “I’m heading up to check on Louisa and Susan.  I’ll probably
give her another of Wanda’s sedatives, and then we should head out.  Em,
I’ll want to go over the guns with you and Susan.”

“Ok,” she said between sips of her
own coffee.

Gus and Boggs spent time with both
Susan and Emilie showing them the basics of the firearms that were being left
with them.  The girls both took the instructions seriously, making the
lessons go more quickly than they might have otherwise.  Louisa had woken
for a brief period, but cried herself back to sleep.  Gus left the
sedatives with Susan with specific instructions should Louisa need any while we
were gone.  He encouraged both girls to work at getting fluids into
Louisa, and mentioned that food would be a bonus if they could get her to
eat.   Gus said his good-bye to Emilie, and I could tell by their
long embrace that they both knew it might be the last time they touched. 
It made me suddenly glad to be going with the men, knowing that if Boggs or I
were to die today, at least we’d be together.

I quickly hugged Emilie once she
and Gus had finished, and could tell she was fighting hard to hold in
tears.  Boggs hugged Susan briefly using just one arm, and I noticed him
whisper something to her.  Under the circumstances, I chose to not read
into it. 

“Ok, let’s get going,” said Gus.
“Susan, Emilie, we’ll drive the step van to the Explorer and get it up and
running.  We’ll drive both back here and position the van for you
girls.  It’ll be a mode of escape incase anything happens.”

“Where would we go?” asked Susan.

Gus sighed.  “Honestly, I’m
not sure.  Just get to safety.  You’ll have about a third of a tank
of gas.  We’d find you. 
Somehow.
  If
you have to leave, build a fire just before dusk every night.  We’ll watch
for smoke.  And if it comes down to it, try not to run the tank dry
because you might have to move again.”

“We’ll put a bundle of kindling
and a lighter in the back of the van. 
Supplies for a
few days, too.
  I doubt you’ll need them but I’d rather have you
prepared,” added Boggs.  “We’ll leave the keys in the glove box.”

It took another ten minutes to
ready the van.  Susan went back upstairs when she heard Louisa crying
again.  Emilie shut the door behind us, and we heard the intricate lock
system Gus had created with Julio’s help engage.  Boggs, Gus, and I
climbed into the cab and the men encouraged me to take the driver’s seat. 
They explained that they both wanted me to be more familiar with the rig. 
I drove us down the rugged driveway to where the Explorer waited.  I
focused on my own mind, and didn’t sense anything amiss.  Boggs fetched
the bucket that held about two gallons or so of gasoline and he and Gus walked
with it to the SUV.  They used a medium sized funnel they had found inside
the shed to pour the fuel into the gas tank, preventing spillage.  I
stayed in the cab of the van, my revolver sitting beside me on the wide
dashboard.  I was glad to be inside, since the storm from the night before
had left everything wet.  I watched as they put the bucket, a hose, and
the funnel into the back of the car for our trip.  Boggs got into the SUV
and cranked the ignition a few times before it started up.    He
pulled the SUV back to the middle of the road, and inched forward.  Gus
opened the driver’s door to the van and instructed me to scoot over to the
passenger side so he could back the rig up toward the cabin.  There wasn’t
an area large enough to turn the van around.

“Gus?” I asked as he drove
backward.

“Ya, darlin’?” he answered.

“We should leave the girls with
siphoning supplies.”

“That we should.
  Think you can scrounge the glove box for a pen and
paper and write down instructions?”

“Ya, sure.”

“There’s a hose in the shed I’ll
cut down and I’ll find a container and some sort of funnel for them.”

I looked through the glove box and
found a receipt from a hardware store, and an old ball point pen.  It took
a few tries until the ink would flow.  I wrote out a brief note and simple
instructions that Gus relayed to me.  He had me asterisk the last step,
which was to not siphon from large trucks because they might contain diesel,
which would ruin the engine.

Now back at the cabin, Gus backed
the van up so it ran alongside the front porch.  He explained that it
would put the driver’s door in easy reach should the girls need to flee in a
hurry. 

“Go ahead and switch over to the
Explorer, Zoe,” Gus instructed me.  “I’ll grab a couple things from the
shed for the girls and be right over.

“Ok,” I said as I climbed down
from the van. 

“Don’t forget your pistol, Zoe,”
he reminded me.

I reached my hand out and he
handed it to me.  “Thanks.  I’m pretty foggy from whatever you gave
me last night.”

I walked to the Explorer, revolver
in hand, and opened the door behind Boggs.  I climbed into the vehicle,
glad to be out of the damp and cold.

“What’s Gus doing?” asked Boggs.

“He’s grabbing siphoning gear for
the van, for the girls,” I answered.

“Good idea,” he said.