He Loves Me Not: Lily’s Story, Book 1 (13 page)

A
lyssa
and I flipped through the racks at the bridal store, searching for the perfect bridal gown. Shopping wasn't one of my favorite activities and I was already getting discouraged, but Alyssa showed no signs of slowing down. She had several gowns draped over one arm.

“Can I put those in a dressing room for you?” the saleslady asked Alyssa, reaching for the gowns.

“Thank you. That would be great.” Alyssa handed the dresses over.

“When is your wedding?” the saleslady asked.

“Oh, it's not me that's getting married. It's Lily.” Alyssa pointed to me as I looked for a chair to sit in.

“When is your wedding, dear?” the woman asked me.

I told her the date Trevor and I had chosen.

“That doesn't leave us much time now, does it?”

I tried to smile, knowing most weddings were planned many months in advance.

“I don't see anything else, Lily,” Alyssa said. “Why don't you try on what we've gotten so far?”

“Sure, why not?” I followed the two women to a dressing room and allowed Alyssa to help me try on the first gown, then I walked out of the dressing room and stepped onto a raised platform to admire myself in a three-way mirror.

“Well?” Alyssa asked.

“It's okay I guess. Let me try on the others.”

The third one I tried on was my favorite—the bodice hugged my curves, lacy sleeves reached halfway between my shoulder and elbow, and the skirt gathered in at the waist then flowed outward from there. It was simple but beautiful.

“This is it,” I announced. “This is my wedding dress.”

The saleslady brought over several different veils, and after choosing one, I slipped it onto my long hair. “That looks gorgeous,” the saleslady assured me. “And the dress should only need minor adjustments.” She looked at the dress from different angles. “Yes, I do believe we can have it done on time.”

As I wrote the check for my wedding dress, it occurred to me that my funds were diminishing a lot more quickly than I'd anticipated. The concern was fleeting as the woman handed me the appointment card for my fitting.

I dropped Alyssa off at her apartment and drove home, then decided to check my student e-mail account. As of that morning I hadn’t gotten a response to my reply, but I couldn't help myself—I was becoming obsessive about checking my e-mail.

I dropped my purse on the kitchen counter then went directly to my laptop and booted it up. I signed into my e-mail account and held my breath while I waited for it to open.

There was a message. I tried to control the shaking of my hands as I clicked on it, and my heart pounded as I waited for it to open. My breath came out in a whoosh when I saw it was junk mail.

It's not even the right address.

I signed off, upset that I hadn't gotten a response.

Two days later it was New Year's Eve. Trevor picked me up for a party one of his friends was throwing. Though I wasn't looking forward to the party—I was more of a homebody—the thought of spending the evening with Trevor would make it worthwhile.

By the time we arrived at the party it was in full swing. The crowd looked a little rougher than I was used to, but I tried not to make judgments about Trevor’s friends. Music blared from a pair of speakers as Trevor pulled me onto the small dance floor. When a slow song started I clung to him, hardly believing he would be my husband in just a matter of weeks.

After we’d been dancing for a while, Trevor asked me if I was thirsty, then led me to a chair to wait while he got me a soda.

A few moments later Trevor handed me a Sprite, then sat on the ottoman next to my chair. “Are you having a good time?” he asked, then he took a large swallow of his drink.

I couldn’t tell what he was drinking since the glass was opaque, but I hoped he was keeping his word that his partying days were behind him.

I sipped at my soda. “It's okay. I don't really know anybody though.”

“It's getting close to midnight. Do you want to get out of here?”

Relieved he’d made the suggestion, I smiled. “Yes, please.”

He took my hand as we walked out to his car.

“Where should we go?” I asked as I put on my seatbelt.

“I know just the place.” He grinned as he started the engine.

We drove for a while, and when we stopped we were overlooking the valley. Even though it was cold outside, the view was spectacular.

Trevor left the car running so we could stay warm. Even so, I cuddled up to him.

He gazed at me, the black of his pupils enlarged in his blue eyes. “It's midnight, Lily.” His voice was husky as he cradled my face in his hands. I closed my eyes, ready to accept his kiss, and a moment later he pressed his lips against mine—gently at first, then more urgently.

“I don't think I can wait four more weeks,” he groaned. “We're practically married now. Do we really need to wait?”

I pulled back. “But we’re not
actually
married.”

He stared at me in the dim moonlight. “You’re one stubborn girl.”

Wanting to change the subject, I searched for something else to talk about. The messages I'd received popped into my head and they wouldn't leave. “Trevor, I got a weird e-mail the other day.”

“Oh, yeah?” He said without much enthusiasm.

“Yes. They were about you.”

That got his attention, and he sat up straighter. “Who sent them?”

“I don't know.”

“Okay. What did they say?”

“Basically, they told me not to marry you.”

“What?” He shifted in his seat to face me more squarely.

“That's right. This time I sent an e-mail back, though.” I smiled, proud I'd taken some sort of action.

“And did you get a response?”

“Not yet.”

His hand shot out and he grabbed me by the arm. “Tell me if you do. Will you promise me?”

Startled by his response, I said, “Okay, if that's what you want.” He let go of my arm and I rubbed it where he’d squeezed.

“It's getting late. I'd better get you home.” He put the car in gear and we drove toward my apartment.

His sudden change in attitude concerned me.

What does he know that he’s not telling me?

W
hen the spring
semester started a few days later, I was excited to begin my new classes. My first one was a course required of everyone—Humanities. When I walked into the classroom I was surprised to find Justin sitting at a desk. There was an empty seat beside him, so I sat next to him.

“What are you doing in this class?” I said.

“Oh, hey, Lily. How's it going?” His smile was warm and friendly.

“Great. How about you? I hear you and Pamela are getting serious.”

“Yeah, but not as serious as you, I hear.”

He seemed genuinely pleased to hear about my engagement, which surprised me.

I guess he's over me. That's good, I suppose.

“Yes,” I said. “Three and a half more weeks.” I paused. “Why are you in this class? I would've thought you'd be down to just a few last classes by now.”

“That's just it. After I talked to my counselor I realized I'd never taken this class. It's required for graduation, you know.”

“Yeah, I know. I thought I'd get it over with early.” I grimaced.

“Good idea. I wish I'd done the same.”

We chatted about our classes until the professor arrived, and as I walked to my next class I realized that I hadn't been uncomfortable around Justin like I'd been in the past.

Maybe it's because we both have other people we're interested in. I don't have to worry about hurting his feelings because I love Trevor.

I went to my other classes and got home shortly after lunch. Trevor was going to come over later so I wanted to get any reading done right away. First I checked my e-mail. Nothing.

Why hasn't he or she responded to my e-mail?

Frustrated at the silence, I sighed.

Maybe I've scared the person off.

My spirits surged at the thought.

One less thing to worry about, I guess.

Trevor showed up late that afternoon.

“Are you sure your parents don't mind hosting our reception?” I asked as we stood in the kitchen making dinner.

“They seemed fine with it.” He hesitated. “There's only one catch.”

I stopped stirring the meat and looked at Trevor. “What?”

He smiled self-consciously. “We'll have to have it there.”

“There?”

“Yeah, in Vegas.”

I began mixing the meat. “Oh. Well, I guess that’s okay. I did tell you I don’t really know many people here. And I suppose it makes sense for us to go to your family.”

He laughed in apparent relief. “Yeah, it might be kind of a hardship for my brothers and their families to all come up here.”

“This is all so complicated. Maybe we should just elope.” I laughed as I looked up at Trevor’s face.

He wasn't laughing. “That's it! We'll elope. Today!” His lips turned up into a broad smile. “You're a genius, Lily.”

I backed up a bit. “I was just joking, Trevor. I mean, I already paid for my dress and everything.”

“So? We'll go pick it up and take it with us. We can drive to Vegas.” He lifted my chin with a finger. “How about it? We can be married by tomorrow.” His face seemed to glow with the idea.

“I don't know, Trevor. I don't know. This is kind of sudden.”

“Sudden? It's not like we weren't going to get married. We're just speeding things up.”

The meat was starting to burn, so I turned away from him to stir it. “What's your hurry? It's only three more weeks.”

Trevor threw his hands up and stormed into the living room. “Lily, why do you have to be so stubborn?”

Stung by his remark, my chest tightened, and I took a deep breath to keep the tears from starting, then I sprinkled salt and pepper into the pan and mixed it in. “I'm not stubborn,” I said under my breath. I grabbed a glass and filled it from the faucet before gulping down the water. After another deep breath, I went into the living room where Trevor was flipping through channels on my miniscule television.

“Why don't you get a better TV?” He grumbled.

“This one works just fine for me.” I stood next to the couch.

Trevor looked up at me. “See what I mean? You're even stubborn about the stupid TV.”

Insulted and embarrassed, I said, “I think you'd better leave now, Trevor.”

He stood and came to me. “I'm sorry, Lily. I didn't mean it. I'm just frustrated you won't see things my way.” He tried to put his arms around me but I pushed him away. “Fine, I'm outta here.”

I watched as he opened the door.

He turned before leaving. “I'm not sure when I'll be back.” Then he slammed the door.

I watched him walk past my window, then I ran into my bedroom and flung myself onto my bed. “Why does he have to be so difficult?” I cried out.

O
ver the next
two days I had trouble concentrating at school, and when I had my second class with Justin, he must have sensed something was bothering me.

“Is something wrong, Lily?” he asked as class ended.

“No.” I had no intention of sharing my problems with him. “Why do you ask?” I gathered up my books and put them in my backpack.

He stared at me for a moment. “No reason. Never mind. Have a good weekend.”

“Thanks. You, too.” I watched him leave and thought about what was bothering me. I hadn't heard from Trevor since our fight two days before, and when I recalled his parting words—
I'm not sure when I'll be back
—worry pressed on my mind.

Maybe he meant something more permanent
.

Anxious to see if there was a message from Trevor, I checked my phone for messages. There was a message, but it wasn’t from Trevor.

“This is Rory's Bridal Shop for Lily,” the message began. “I’m calling to remind you about your fitting appointment this afternoon.”

“Oh, shoot,” I said out loud. “I forgot all about that.” I knew I'd have to hurry to make the appointment.

Forty-five minutes later I stood in front of a three-way mirror while a woman pinned the hem and waist of my wedding gown. I gazed at my reflection, thinking about Trevor and our fight.

Is this wedding even going to happen?

Blinking back tears, I had to look away from the mirror until I could get myself under control.

When the fitting was done, I changed back into my clothes.

“Your gown should be ready by next Friday,” the sales lady said. “We'll have you try it on one last time, but I'm sure it will be a perfect fit.”

“Thank you,” I said as I took the appointment card.

I waited until I got home to call Trevor, but when I tried his cell, I got his voice mail. Wanting to speak to him face to face, I drove to his apartment, hopeful I’d find him there.

Bronson answered the door. “Hi, Lily.” His voice was slurred. “How's it goin', sweetheart?”

“Fine. Is Trevor home?”

“No, but I'm here. Why don't you come in and spend time with me?”

“Do you know where he is?”

“Nope. Can't help you there.”

“Okay. Well, thanks anyway.” I turned and hurried away.

I guess he’s getting an early start on his weekend partying. At least Trevor isn’t there with him. Maybe he’s at work.

A few minutes later I pulled up to
Rob’s Auto Body
, and when I entered the shop, no one was in sight. I stood at the counter for several minutes before getting up the nerve to go through the door I’d seen Trevor come through the last time I’d been there.

Carefully stepping around the counter, I tried not to touch anything that looked greasy, then opened the door and peeked into the adjoining room. Two cars had their hoods open, and a number of car parts were strewn about.

No one seemed to be in the room and I wondered if they'd all left for a dinner break. But the main garage doors were open.

Someone must be here
.

I walked toward the other side of the garage, careful to avoid the tools and parts on the floor.

“Hey!”

I spun around at the sharp voice.

“What are you doing in here?” It was Rob, the owner of the shop. He strode toward me. “You're not supposed to be back here.”

“I'm sorry. I was looking for Trevor. Is he working today?”

His voice softened when he recognized me. “Oh, you're Trevor’s fiancé, aren't you?”

I smiled tentatively. “Yes, Lily.” I would have held out my hand if his weren't so dirty.

“Yeah. I remember you. Trevor isn’t here right now. He’s . . . uh . . . he’s running an errand for me.”

“Okay. Do you know how long he might be?”

Rob glanced to the side then back to me. “It could be a while. Sorry.”

“Would you tell him I came by?”

“Yeah, sure.”

I backed toward the open garage doors and out into the sunlight. “Thanks.” When he nodded, I turned and hurried to my car.

Once home, I fixed myself dinner before flipping on the television to watch the news. I squinted at the TV.

Trevor’s right. This set is too small. Maybe I should get a decent one for us before the wedding.

As I thought about Trevor and our engagement, I hoped he would come by so we could straighten everything out. I hated it when we were angry at each other.

At nine o'clock that night Trevor knocked on my door.

“Rob said you came by,” he said, his expression serious.

I stood at the door. “I did. I wanted to talk to you.” His stern look frightened me.

Maybe he’s still angry from two days ago.

“Do you want to come in?” I asked.

“Yeah.” He stepped into my apartment and I closed the door behind him.

“Come sit down, Trevor.” He did, and I sat near him without touching him. I tried smiling but he didn't return the favor.

“What did you want to talk about, Lily?”

“Are you still mad at me?” A blush rose on my face. “I'm sorry, Trevor.”

His expression softened and he gathered me into his arms. “I'm not mad anymore.”

I pulled back. “Then what's wrong? You seem upset.”

He frowned. “Rob really let me have it when I got back. He said I needed to make sure you knew never to go into the shop like you did.” He looked at his hands. “He said he'd fire me if you did it again.”

I was horrified. “That's not fair! It's not your fault I went in there. He shouldn't treat you like that. Why do you put up with that? Maybe you should find another job.”

Trevor laughed at my outrage. “He won't fire me. That's just him letting off steam. Besides, I know things about his business that he wouldn't want getting out. Don't worry, my job's secure.”

“Good. And what do you mean? What do you know about his business?”

He frowned. “Nothing you need to worry about.” He stroked my hair and guided my head back against his chest.

Happy he wasn't angry with me, I decided not to press him for more information.

“Now, about our wedding,” he said.

I sat up, smiling. “What about it?”

He grinned. “We never finished working out the details the other day.”

“Oh. Well, if it's easier for your family I don't care if we're married there.” An idea occurred to me. “What about blood tests?”

“I don't know. I didn't think of that. I guess we'll have to find out.”

“We could go online right now and see if we can get any information.”

“Okay. You're the expert.”

He watched over my shoulder as I searched for the information, and in only a few minutes we had our answer. I turned to Trevor. “Looks like no blood test.” I smiled. “Which is good since I hate needles.”

He smiled. “And there’s no waiting period to get the marriage license.”

“That makes it easier.” As we continued searching the web, we found a site that listed different places in Las Vegas to have the ceremony. “We could have it here,” I said, pointing to an image of a botanical garden. “It looks really pretty.”

“I’m fine with that,” he said.

“And look at this. We can even have the reception there right after the ceremony. These prices are actually really reasonable.”

“Yeah. And look, they’ll provide the cake.”

I turned to him with a bright smile, excited to discover planning our wedding wouldn’t be so challenging. “Do you think it will be available on the date we need it?”

“I guess there’s only one way to find out,” he said. “Let’s see if we can book it.”

We pressed the button to book the wedding and were thrilled to see that our date was available. A moment later we’d booked the location.

“I guess we won’t need your parents to host the wedding after all,” I said. “Do you think your mom will be disappointed?”

“She’ll get over it.”

I hoped so. I didn’t want to start off on the wrong foot with my future mother-in-law. “Maybe you’d better call her right now and let her know the change in plans.” He agreed, and a moment later he had his mom on the phone. I listened to his side of the conversation and it sounded like his mom wasn’t mad. He hung up a few moments later. “So?” I asked.

He grinned. “She’s fine with it. You heard me tell her we’re keeping it really small. She said she’d get us her guest list ASAP.”

I smiled, pleased that everything was coming together so nicely.

“What else do we need to do?” Trevor asked.

“We should get our plane tickets.”

“We can do it online.”

I went to the airline website and we soon had the reservations made. “You know,” I said, “we need to figure out the invitations right away.”

“What do you mean by figure them out?”

“Well, I know a lot of people do online invitations. Since time is so short, that would probably be a good option for us.”

“Can you take care of that?”

“Don't you want to choose them together?”

He shrugged. “I don't care what they look like, as long as they say you're going to marry me.” He lifted my chin with two fingers and pressed his lips to mine.

His touch made me slightly dazed and I tried to collect myself. “Okay.” I gazed at him for a moment.

“What?” he asked.

“I just can't believe you'll be my husband three weeks from tomorrow.”

He grinned. “Pretty cool, huh? Hey, what about a honeymoon?”

My smile faded. “We'll have to wait until the semester's over. I don’t want to miss any classes.”

He nodded. “I thought you might say something like that. That's fine. I understand.”

My smile returned, relieved he understood how important my education was to me. “When your mom gives you her guest list, let me know and I'll get the invitations out as soon as I can.”

“I'm sorry to put all this on you when you have classes,” he said.

“It's okay. School only started the other day. Things aren't too bad yet.” I paused. “What about you? How do you think your classes are going to be?”

He looked away. “Fine.” Then he smiled at me. “You know, the usual.”

I nodded. “Great.”

T
he following Friday
I had the final fitting for my wedding gown, and just as the saleslady had promised, it fit perfectly. “Would it be possible for you to ship it to Vegas? That's where I'll be getting married,” I said.

“Certainly. Just give me the address and I'll take care of it.”

I gave her the information, then drove home, secure in the knowledge that my gown would be waiting for me when I arrived at the Caldwell’s home in two weeks. And I'd received the list of guests from Marcy and had sent out the eVites, so there really wasn’t anything left for me to do.

The next two weeks flew by as I went to school. I usually came home to eat so I hadn't met Trevor for lunch.

In fact, I haven't seen Trevor around campus at all.

That thought was quickly replaced with the mental list of things I needed to pack before we caught our flight first thing the next morning. Alyssa would fly in after Trevor and I had arrived.

T
he next morning
as we settled into our seats on the airplane, I thought about how much my life was about to change.

I think I’m ready for it.

“Do you have the rings?” Trevor asked as he fastened his seatbelt.

“Yes, yours and mine both.” I smiled a secret smile. “And you don't get to see yours until Saturday.”

He reached for my hand. “That's fine with me, although it doesn't seem quite fair.”

“What's not fair about it?” I squeezed his hand.

“Well, you got to see the wedding band that goes with your engagement ring.”

I smiled in response. “Your mom said my gown arrived and is hanging in one of the closets. I have to admit, I was a little worried it wouldn't get there on time, but it did.”

The plane started moving down the runway.

“I called the hotel we'll be staying in tomorrow night to make sure they didn't screw up our reservations or anything,” he said. “By the way, my brother Chris will get us checked in and put our luggage in our room so we can bypass that when we get to the hotel.”