Holy Socks And Dirtier Demons (33 page)

focused on her pale face, watching for a sign. A show of weakness.

Something. Anything to erase the flavor of betrayal inside me.

Vapor obscured her for a second or two. Giving me enough time to

charge the ledge and grab the kid, but something held me back. Instead, I

crept closer to Lilith. Close enough to feel the heat from the vent, and smell

the tangy scent of sage.

“Before we die, I have something to tell you,” Lilith’s voice rose

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from the steam cloud.

“Yeah, what’s that?”

The cloud surrounding her shimmered, slowly disappearing in a gust

of icy wind. She cleared her throat. “I love you.”

I swallowed hard. “Son of a bitch.”

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Sixty Four

With a prayer, I lunged into the darkness, throwing myself at Lilith.

My arms wrapped around her swollen middle, cradling the child against me

as we hit the rooftop. From behind us, a burst of gunfire cracked in the air. A

bullet whizzed by the spot Lilith had occupied moments before. The acidic

scent of gunpowder tickled my nostrils.

Lilith squirmed in my grip, her hands clutching her stomach. “I

didn’t mean a word of it,” she whispered in my ear before letting out an ear-

shattering scream. “I don’t love you, damn it. And you better not get yourself

killed.”

“Ditto.” I shoved her behind the metal vent, and scanned the rooftop

for the shooter. “Now stay down.”

She nodded, pushing my gun into my hand. “No bullets, but if you

get close enough, you can club one of them with it.”

I kissed her. “Thanks.”

“You’re wel—” a scream of pain ripped through her, cutting off her

words. Her stomach knotted, the baby straining against its confinement.

Oh God, not now. We had an assassin shooting at us, Armageddon

upon us, and the Messiah hanging perilously from a cage a few feet from us.

Now, Lilith was about to give birth one hundred and two floors up.

During a pause in gunfire, I rolled from my hiding space, and vaulted

into the darkness. At first, I saw nothing, the night providing ample cover for

the shooter. A bullet slammed into the brick above my head stripping it like

string cheese. With a duck and weave move straight out of a Buggy’s Bunny

cartoon, I danced my way across the rooftop. The pounding of the four

horsemen in synch with the thundering beat of my heart.

The kid’s mewing grew louder, as did the rate of falling hamsters. So

there I was, dodging bullets and hamster parts, while keeping one eye on the

kid cage, and the other eye on my laboring lover. All in all, I’d had better

days.

A flash on my left told me what I needed to know. The shooter hid in

the elevator alcove. A perfect ambush spot, except Lilith had forced me up

the stairs. Again, I owed her my life.

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Taking a steadying breath, I charged the alcove, yelling like a

madman. The element of insanity, or maybe surprise gave me the time I

needed. I launched myself at the shooter. My momentum pushed us from the

alcove and against the protective railing. Rattling my teeth, but my grip on

the killer stayed strong. The metal barrier released a squawk of protest and

gave way. The assassin screeched once before plummeting over the edge.

Lucky for me, the surgical gown I’d pilfered from the hospital

snagged the busted railing, and stopped me from falling to my death.

Lucky for her, as she toppled from the ledge, Mary had grabbed a

hold of my boot, and now hung one hundred and two stories from certain

death.

“Stop struggling. You’re going to get yourself—” I glanced at her

swollen belly, “—and the baby killed.”

“I don’t want to die.” Mary hugged my foot tighter. “Oh God, please

don’t let me fall.”

“Jace.”

“What?”

“‘Oh, Jace, please don’t let me fall.’ Not God.” With every ounce of

strength left in my body, I struggled to pull Mary and myself to safety.

“God’s a little busy at the moment with the apocalypse you started.”

“I didn’t start anything. Samuel did.”

“Samuel?” Damn, I’d thought after the God’s Ball incident I’d seen

the last of him. The devil, embarrassed by his son’s defeat, had banished

Samuel to hell, for not limited to one hundred years.

“He hates it,” she whispered the words, “down there.”

“I’ll bet.” Hence the apocalypse.

She sniffed once, her eyes clearing. “I never wanted any of this to

happen.” Her voice hitched. A sure sign of the crocodile tears to come. “I

never wanted to hurt you.”

“You shot me.”

She tilted her head. “When?”

“In the alley.” The muscles in my arms quivered, and for a second, I

considered kicking Mary in the head, and being done with it. “With my own

gun. Remember?”

“It was only a flesh wound.”

Yep, a kick in the head seemed like a perfect solution. Too bad, I’d

already crawled back over the ledge, dragging Mary in my wake. Once safe,

I lay on the concrete, sucking in mouthfuls of smoky air.

The kid’s mewing had grown louder, but I didn’t have the strength to

move yet. My arms felt like rubber, and my heart slammed wildly in my

chest. Mary appeared unaffected, continuing her tirade, “I’m everything a

man could want, but no, you went and chose a demon as fucked up as you

are. Then Sid dies, and I’m left with no choice.”

Choice, a funny word with little meaning. I struggled to sit up, to

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finish my job, rescue the kid, sacrifice myself, and save the world.

“Heaven belongs to me. Can’t you see that? I’ve sacrificed

everything
.” Mary pounded on the cement. “It’s my turn. I’m the prettiest.”

The kid’s shrieks reached ear-splitting level. “Jesus, shut him up

already.” She covered her ears with her hands. “That kid is driving me nuts.”

Yeah, Mary took unfit parenting to a new level. Tomorrow morning,

if there was a tomorrow, I’d call a lawyer. Find out about custody. I doubted

any court would deny God’s bastard son custody of his own bastard child.

“Don’t move,” I ordered as I stumbled to my feet. “I mean it. If I

come back and you’re gone, there will be hell to pay.” An empty threat at

this point, but what the hell.

I limped to the ledge where the kid’s cage rattled in the wind. “I’m

right here, kid.” As I pulled the cage from the ledge, his mewing ceased, and

the hamsters raining from the sky vanished.

The kid crawled from the cage, his eyes wide. Other than a few

scratches, probably from the pissed off Bodhi cat in his arms, the kid seemed

all right.

“Mine find me.” He smiled up at me, drool slipping down his heart

shaped chin.

“Yeah kid, I found you.” I patted his head. “Now can you do

something about the end of the world?”

He smiled up at me, his hair standing on end. “Okay, Mine. I make

horsies go bye-bye.” And like a flick of a God’s favored son switch, the roar

of horse hoofs and approaching doom winked out.

Damn, I had to learn that trick.

The city returned to normal, or as normal as a city packed with eight

million people who’d just witnessed the end of times could be.

I nodded, feeling both foolish and proud. I’d found the kid and saved

the world, all without any grand sacrifice. Of course, I’d almost destroyed the

world too. Hell, I still might. It was early yet. Give me a week.

A pain-laced scream drew my attention. Oh God, Lilith. She needed

a hospital and fast. The baby, much like his father, Samuel, was about to

come premature. The kid lifted Bodhi cat, and waddled to Lilith. His

incessant chatter blocked my growing terror.

Before I helped Lilith though I had to deal with Mary. Clearly

demented, Mary was a danger to the kid, not to mention Lilith. It was time to

end it. One way or another.

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Sixty Five

“So it’s a deal?” I glanced from the contract, written on the side of a

Starbucks cup, and back to Mary. She wiped a tear from her eye and nodded.

Behind me, Lilith argued between labor pains. The kid did his best to soothe

her, but every time I opened my mouth, Lilith exploded.

“Moron, why not sign over Easter too?” Lilith slapped me in the

back of the head before clutching her belly. “Ahhhhhh.” Her body shook

with the force of a contraction.

“Breathe sweetheart.” I winced as her nails dug into my skin.

“Breathe? Are you fucking kidding me? I’m passing a basketball

here, and your advice is breathe?” She blew out a long breath, followed by

three sharp indrawn ones. The tightness in her face eased. “I hate you.”

I winked, and returned my focus to Mary, who had turned pale under

her fake-n-bake tan. “I’ve changed my mind,” Mary said, stumbling to her

feet.

“You can’t.” I jumped up. “We had a deal. You rule Heaven on the

fourth Tuesday of the New Year, and in return, leave the kid, Lilith, me, and

our yet-to-be-named kid alone.” God could use the time off. Besides, what

harm could she do in one day...?

Mary was shaking her head. “Yes, we had a deal, but that...” She

pointed at Lilith. “I refuse to give birth.”

I shrugged, peering at the growing pool at Mary’s feet. “Might be a

little late to complain.” Her eyes followed my gaze, and she let out a scream

rivaled by the eternally dammed. Mary dropped to the pavement writhing in

pain.

Lilith rolled her eyes. “Drama queen.”

“Slut,” Mary answered back.

“Why you—”

I grabbed Lilith as she lunged at Mary. “Kick her ass later. Right

now, I want you to do something for me.”

“Haven’t I done enough already?” She bit her lip, signaling another

contraction, but she didn’t cry out. When it passed, she signed. “Okay, what

do you want?”

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Kissing her softly, I patted her belly and listened for the telltale

whoop of an ambulance siren. “Give me a son.”

~ * ~

Pacing the hospital room, I swallowed another cup of bitter coffee

waiting for the birth of my children. Five hours had past since our arrival at

the hospital. And one hour ago, I’d been kicked out of Lilith’s room. A minor

complication, the doctor had told me. Nothing to worry about. But a whisper

of terror crawled up my spine burrowing into my brain as minutes clicked off

the clock.

The kid sat on the worn waiting room floor, coloring, almost like a

normal child. Almost, because he’d drawn a damn good forgery of the Mona

Lisa except with yellow eyes. His presence comforted me, as did a carton of

milk-turned-whiskey.

A nurse smiled at me, and knocked on the delivery ward door where

both Lilith and Mary labored. The door opened, and I could hear Mary

bitching about me.

Nothing from Lilith though. No screams, shouts, or bitter outbursts. I

gulped another mouthful of whiskey. Mary continued to yell, comparing me

to the son of a dog. The dog-man came out on top.

My mind wandered. Soon the next ruler of Heaven, a child born of

my loins, would arrive. What did that mean for the kid, for the world? Ruling

heaven was a hell of a responsibility. I hoped God knew what He was doing

because that mysterious ways crap wouldn’t fly.

A scream cut through my musing. “I guess we’re about to find out if

the world’s ready for my seed,” I said to the kid. He glanced up, grinned, and

returned to his coloring.

The yelp of a baby burst from the delivery ward. A lusty cry, manly

cry. A minute later, a doctor stepped through the doors. Blood soaked his lab

coat turning it a dark pink. The tingling of terror inside me exploded into full

on horror. Something was wrong.

“Mr. Miller?”

I nodded my head, sickness pooling in my intestines. My mind

pictured a smiling Lilith, our child tucked in her arms. The vision vanished as

the doctor’s words hit me.

“There was a complication during delivery.”

I closed my eyes. “The baby?”

“A health boy.” The doctor smiled slightly. “A
big
healthy boy.”

“And...” I couldn’t force Lilith’s name past the lump in my throat.

Tears burned the back of my eyes, but I stonily stood in the chaos swirling

inside me.

“I’m sorry.” He cleared his throat. “Your wife...”

I closed my eyes, waiting.

“She died giving birth.”

The final sacrifice.

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Sixty Six

The Kid’s Third Birthday, the Year of Our Lord...

“Hey kid.” I shoved Jesus with my foot, careful not to spill the tray

of peppermint laced hot chocolate in my hands. “Pick up your toys, and go

find somewhere else to smite Bodhi.”

The kid’s bottom lip quivered, tears sparkling in his blue eyes.

“Forget it,” I said. “Water works ain’t going to work. Now grab your fleabag