Just Between Us (27 page)

I took a shower, pulled out the dress I had bought for that night, and hurriedly applied make up and coiffed my hair. The girls were arriving at seven, and this afternoon we had arranged to have drinks in the party room with Kyle, Vinnie, and David. My dress was peach and strapless, tight at the top and pinched at the waist but with a more forgiving skirt. I teamed it with some cream stilettos and applied natural looking make up. It was almost seven when I added my new earrings with a smile.

             
“Soph.” Kyle knocked on my door. “You ready?”

             
“Yes, come in!” I shouted and he pushed the door open.

             
He nodded. “Looking good.”

             
“You too,” I said, taking in his dark jeans and black shirt combo that made him look irresistible.

             
“Let’s go.” He walked to me and put his hand out for me, I slipped mine in his and he pulled me to him.

             
“Kyle,” I hissed, “someone …”

             
He cut me off with a kiss, and I melted into him.

             
“Just getting a kiss in before I have to stay away from you all night.”

             
“Fine.” I smiled up at him and ran my hand over his chest.

             
“No flirting with anyone other than me tonight,” he said wide-eyed.

             
“You too.” He took my hand again and pulled me to the door, letting me squeeze past him and grazing my bum with his hand as I did.

             
“Top floor,” he said, patting my bum and pushing me to the party room stairs.

Twenty-One
– Just out

Now

Kyle and I fell into an easy routine, and it was hard to think about going home, but it was looming. I had to be back in Lytham for the end of August to plan my lessons for the next term, and school began early September. My mum constantly asked about my plans when she called, and I think, although she didn’t mention it, she thought I was putting off facing my life at home by staying with Kyle. She was partly right. Being with Kyle was perfect; it was magical and seemed like a different life. It was the life I could have had, but I chose a different path, and I had that to deal with as well. I hadn’t heard from Simon, but the estate agent called me a couple of times a week to say that they were showing people around our property, and during the last phone call they said that one couple was having a second viewing, which was promising. Ashley also kept me updated with her pregnancy woes and the size of her feet and fingers, which was putting me off pregnancy for life.

             
Kyle would go to work on weekdays, and I would find things to occupy myself. Sometimes we would go to the gym after he finished work, other afternoons we would go out for dinner or just for a drink. It was just nice spending time together in his apartment, where we were just Sophie and Kyle who had just started dating. I loved hiding here with him and enjoying whatever we were, but the summer was drawing to a close, and I wondered what he thought we would do and where this was really going.

Kyle

I have watched a fair few films over the years, lots of television series’, and read the odd book, and so I knew a bit about romance. I knew what women wrote about and how it was dramatised. I would see someone reconnect with their first love, watch couples separated by time and space reunited, or see some bloke make a sweeping gesture to keep his girl. I saw those things and they were make-believe, and I never thought enough to draw any comparisons to my own life. Love just never seemed to apply to me. I was unloved, the boy that no one wanted, and my father got landed with. Looking back, I was an angry fucking teenager with a lot of issues, but somehow with Sophie I was always someone different. Back then I just wanted her, any way I could get her. I wanted her body and then I was patient after she pushed me away. I had to have her again, I was addicted, and so I played the long game and we became friends.

             
I never had to try with other girls, they threw themselves at me from primary school onwards, and it made me arrogant. Sophie wasn’t like that, she made me try, I initiated everything, and I coaxed her using every skill I could summon so she would want me more. I see her now laying next to me, I watch her face twitch when she’s asleep, see her blonde hair swept over my pillows, and I know. I know I loved her then. She hated me throughout our childhood years, and I wanted her because of that, but the man I became that summer with her was happy, she made me feel happy. Here again that has returned to me. I haven’t pined after her for years or any shit like that. I haven’t spent ten years wishing things could be different, but I’ve never felt truly satisfied. I couldn’t be arsed with the other women, hated when they whined or demanded, hated that they might want more. I gave them as much as I could, but that was indifference. I didn’t want to commit and still wanted to keep my own routine, but for Sophie I’d do anything to keep this feeling.

             
So I’ve seen the films, I’ve read the books, but now I understand what they’ve all been talking about. She’s the person I would move heaven and earth for. I was too young to see it then, I wanted her, and I was pissed off when she pushed me away. I wasn’t finished with her, and I wanted more. These past few weeks I realise that she was the only person that ever let me feel settled, and I want that so much. I want to be settled but only with her.

Sophie

“So do you think you could handle dinner at Mike and Tanya’s on Friday?” Kyle asked one evening as we sat on the sofa watching television.

             
“Like a dinner party?” I asked, cringing at the thought.

             
“No just us … informal. Mike just asked and said they’d love to have us.”

             
“What do they know about us?” I asked tentatively.

             
“What do they need to know?” Kyle turned to me and narrowed his eyes slightly defensively.

             
“You know, that I’m your step-sister, and our history and …” I sighed.

             
“No.” He shook his head. “I’m not a sharer; all they need to know is that we’re together and we’re old friends. Who cares about the rest?”

             
“People care, Kyle, people always have to know every detail. It’s human nature.”

             
“So we say we went to school together, we’ve known each other forever, had a fling ten years ago, and now we’ve reconnected.”

             
I shook my head. “But we’re hiding again.” I sighed.

             
“What do you want to say then?”

             
“I don’t know,” I groaned in frustration, “but if this is going to be anything between us,” I laid my hand on his leg gently, “we need to start as we mean to go on. Not being honest about who we are to each other, it’s like we’re ashamed.”

             
“Well, what do you want to do? March in there and announce that you’re my step-sister and just get on with the evening?”

             
“No, just not lie if asked.”

             
He smiled at me. “You’ll hate that though, that was the one thing you never wanted to do.”

             
“I know.” I smiled back. “Maybe this time we should … be open from the beginning.”             

             
“Soph.” He took my hand and kissed it, “We’re not doing anything wrong you know, we never were.”

             
“I know, but people will judge us.”

             
“Let them judge.” He put his arm around me and pulled me into an embrace. “We don’t have to tell anyone anything,” he soothed. “I don’t care if only you and I ever know.” He laughed.

             
“No,” I said firmly. “If they ask how we met and when we got together, we’ll say.”

             
“Okay.” He nodded.

             
“Okay,” I said, taking a deep breath.

The following Friday night Kyle came home from work and we busied ourselves getting ready for dinner at Mike and Tanya’s house. They didn’t want us until seven thirty, it was very casual, and so there wasn’t much preparation involved, and so we were both ready by six. We decided to have a drink on the balcony before we got a taxi there and sit in the late afternoon warmth. Kyle told me about his day, and I loved to watch him speak so animatedly about his clients and the idiosyncrasies of Geraldine.              

             
“Let’s go!” he said an hour later. A few glasses of wine had left me a little tipsy, but it was Dutch courage.

             
“Okay.” I sighed. He pulled me to him as we walked out of the door.

             
“They love you, they’re just curious about me having a girlfriend.” He laughed.

             
“Rather than a string of one night stands.” I smiled as we made our way down in the lift to the waiting taxi.

             
“More like rather than no one.”

We arrived at an impressive red brick townhouse half an hour later, Kyle paid for the taxi, and then we made our way to the front door. It was a beautiful old Victorian property with three stories, and light was shining up from the basement window, which had obviously been renovated. There were steps up to the large red front door with wrought iron railings.

             
“Wow, nice house,” I said as Kyle came to stand next to me.

             
“It’s even better inside.” He laughed.             

             
We rang the doorbell and Tanya appeared moments later. She was dressed down in a pair of faded jeans, bare feet, and a white tank top. Her blonde hair fell around her shoulders but despite the casual clothes she still wore full make up.

             
“Come in!” she said with a huge grin, pulling me into a hug as I stepped inside.

             
“Hi,” I said, hugging her back, “your home is lovely.”

             
“Oh thanks,” she said swatting my arm.

             
“Here you go,” Kyle said, handing over a bottle of wine that we had brought.

             
“Oh thanks, but you shouldn’t have.”

             
“Nonsense,” Kyle said, hugging her, too.

             
“Now go downstairs, Mike’s in the back in the office. Go through. You can chat to me, Sophie,” she said.

             
I followed Kyle past the wide wooden staircase into the hallway that was made of beautiful dark polished wood. At the back of the hallway we turned right into a brightly lit stair well that was beckoning us down and we followed the light into a huge open plan kitchen. The kitchen was black gloss with wooden counter tops. It spanned the whole of the back of the house and in the front was a large formal dining table, set for dinner.

             
“Right.” Tanya jumped behind the island in the centre of the kitchen and stirred something on the hob. Leaning against the counter stood a teenage girl with long, sandy blonde hair tousled to her waist, looking intently at her mobile phone. “I’ll pour some wine, white or red?”

             
“Red for me,” Kyle said, “Soph?” he looked to me.

             
“White please,” I said, perhaps more relaxed than I felt.

             
“Okay,” she said excitedly, rubbing her hands together and turning to grab glasses. “Come on Leonora, out of the way.” She shooed the young girl who didn’t look up but just side-stepped as Tanya reached behind her. Tanya turned to us and rolled her eyes with a small smile.

             
“This is Leonora,” Kyle said, stepping to the girl and grabbing her phone playfully.

             
“Hey,” she squeaked, “Give it back. Mum!” she yelped petulantly.

             
“Come on Nora, you can fight better than that,” Kyle teased, as she jumped to get the phone from where he held it high above her head.

             
“Don’t tease the lions Kyle, they might bite.” Tanya said, just as two young boys tumbled into the kitchen fighting and bustled into their mother who struggled to hold on to the wine glasses.

             
“Out of my kitchen, you two!” she barked, regained herself, and smiled at me. “These two.” She grabbed them to her side after putting the glasses down, “Are Rupert and Hugo.”

             
“Twins?” I asked.

             
“No,” she shook her head, “one strategically planned second child and then … the surprise third.”

             
“Oh.” I nodded my head. She let them go and they ran upstairs. “How old are you?” I asked Leonora who had now recovered her phone and the leaning, surly position against the counter top.

             
“She’s thirteen,” Tanya said pouring the wine and sliding our glasses across the island. She took her glass and a large gulp. “She can’t hear you when you speak unless that phone is confiscated or smashed to smithereens.”

             
“I see.” I nodded.

             
“Kids.” Tanya shrugged. “They ruin your body and then they ruin your life.” She chuckled.

             
“Ah I’m sure you love them really,” Kyle said with a wry smile.

             
“I’m counting the years until uni or incarceration.” We all laughed, and I wondered if Tanya was actually joking.

             
Kyle slipped away a few minutes later to find Mike. His study was situated behind the kitchen area, and it seemed to be his man lair where he spent most of his time, according to Tanya. She seemed very different tonight, in her own environment, from the night we had met. Although I knew she had a phenomenal gym body, it wasn’t on display tonight. I saw that the meal she was preparing had taken a lot of work, and as she tried to get the kids to move upstairs, I just saw an ordinary wife and mother with ordinary issues with whom I could relate.

             
I learnt that she didn’t work but did volunteer at Leonora’s school on the “Friends” committee. Also that she used to be in PR before she met Mike and gave up her career to be a mum. She was dedicated to the children but still found them hard work, especially the boys who she was unaccustomed to as an only child herself. “I had no idea that boys were so boisterous.” She wrinkled her nose and laughed lightly. “Do you have siblings?” she asked.