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Authors: Joan Elizabeth Lloyd

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A thirty-nine-year-old bisexual woman wrote:

My fantasy sex begins with my refusal to undress or dress as per the wishes and instructions of my master or mistress. He/she
strips me of my clothing and chains me between two trees, giving him or her complete access to my whole body. My master/mistress
then blindfolds me so that I cannot see when and how my punishment is coming. He/she kisses and caresses me only to then use
a slapper on the underside of my breasts. He/she whips my thighs and buttocks, then alternates between caressing gestures
and using the slapper. He/she attaches nipple clamps, pinches, and whips on me, making me beg for release.

A sixty-two-year-old man wrote:

About as close as we come on this one is that my wife likes to have her hair pulled firmly during foreplay and more harshly
just before climax. A tweak on the nipples pleasures her, too, first a lick, a suck, and then a quick jolt, building up toward
climax. Even a gentle bite on her labia or harsh quick suck on her clit is pleasurable at times. Gentle pulls on pussy hair,
just to the point of discomfort, are also good for her. None of this is required every time, just when we’re in the mood!

A thirty-one-year-old man wrote:

I like moderate pain—deep scratching, slapping, hair pulling, etc. As for acting out a real pain scene I think the outfits
are so silly that I can’t see getting into B&D.

A forty-seven-year-old man wrote:

I have been tied up on a couple of occasions. The best happened years ago in Phoenix at a resort. My girlfriend and I were
playing and she wanted to tie me up. I was game, so she placed me facedown on the bed, then tied my arms and legs—snugly,
but not tight. Then she left the room!!!!

She had been gone for about half an hour when I heard the key in the door. It
wasn’t
her. It was the maid, and she got an eyeful of my bare ass. I could swear I heard the whoosh of breath from her mouth in
surprise. Seconds later my girlfriend came in and we both told the woman all was well, so she left. My girlfriend stood over
the bed and acted ticked off at me for showing my ass to another woman. Slowly, making sure I knew exactly what she was going
to do, she took the belt from my pants and began spanking me, hard. When she decided to make it a bit more personal, she spanked
me with her hand.

I was getting immensely turned on, and she was well aware of it. She couldn’t see my huge erection, of course, because I was
facedown, but from my movements, bucking my hips so my cock rubbed against the bedspread with each smack, she knew it. The
spanking continued, and I kept moving, rubbing against the satin. I ended up coming, spurting all over the covers.

It wasn’t the end of it. She spanked me some more, then untied my hands and made me lick up some of my sperm. It was so degrading,
yet so hot. I don’t think anything like this could have happened with a casual lover, but we were very close and it worked
out well.

She and I incorporated spanking into our lovemaking from that point on. It was me being spanked at first, generally over her
knees. Later she agreed to be spanked and I warmed her bottom. She learned to enjoy it as much as I did.

A twenty-seven-year-old woman wrote:

Sometimes I like being spanked or having my nipples pinched or bitten a little. I haven’t been really into a lot of pain,
though.

My fantasy is a scenario in which I’ve been spanked or taken roughly. Kind of a mock-rape thing, where I don’t have any say,
and he spanks me and fucks me any way he wants. He also makes me pleasure and suck him.

A forty-three-year-old woman wrote:

We’ve played hard enough that my husband has put bruises on my ass because I kept on telling him harder, harder, and harder.
I just love to have my ass spanked good and hard. I love being the bad girl who deserves to be spanked and fucked up the ass
as only a bad girl deserves.

A twenty-seven-year-old man wrote:

We have bitten, choked, and scratched each other. She loves to twist my nipples until I scream in agony. It makes my cock
harder and longer, too.

A forty-year-old man wrote:

I enjoy enough pain to be uncomfortable, but not excruciating. I like it when she bites my abdomen, pokes my navel, or squeezes
my balls when she is excited. I like to hear her wince or whimper whenever I thrust my well-lubricated cock into her anus.
Quickly her whimpers of pain turn to moans of pleasure.

A forty-eight-year-old man wrote:

My nipples are always the surest way to excite me, and I love having them played with—the rougher the better—before and during
sex. Before sex it’s the surest way to get me erect, and during sex it is the fastest way to bring me off. If she does it
right I’ll be tender for a week, which is fantastic.

A twenty-five-year-old man wrote:

I enjoy pain during sex. I love to be bitten on the neck hard enough to slightly break the skin. And I like my nipples to
be bitten also—hard but not too hard. My wife and I have learned exactly what works best.

A forty-five-year-old man wrote:

My wife and I have played games like this enough that I introduced the concept of a safe word to her. We don’t do control
that often in a way that I think a safe word would be needed, but we are both more comfortable knowing it’s there. I gave
her an erotic spanking hard enough one time that I thought she might use a safe word but she didn’t. She later described that
as a memorable encounter. And it was great knowing that I could do what I wanted and that she would stop me if it got too
bad.

She doesn’t ask to be controlled or spanked, but when I take the initiative and dominate her, her responses tell me she gets
pleasure from this. Interesting part is, she has never openly admitted this. One of my goals is to encourage her to discuss
it.

A “safe word” is an uncommon word—say,
marshmallow
—that, when used by either player in a pain or control situation, means
stop now
, no questions asked. It frees both partners. The one who is controlling the situation, the dominant or top, can do whatever
he or she wants, knowing the partner will use the safe word whenever things stop being pleasurable. The one who is controlled,
the submissive or bottom, can scream, “No, don’t!” knowing that nothing will stop unless the safe word is used. It’s a wonderfully
freeing feeling just submitting to the wishes of a partner.

As with everything else, it’s wonderful for some and a turnoff for others. It’s fabulous to have so many choices, isn’t it?

 

HAVE YOU EVER HAD HOMOSEXUAL FANTASIES?

I
asked folks to tell me whether, if they were straight, they’d ever had homosexual fantasies and, if gay, if they’d ever had
straight ones. Of those who responded, 46% of the men and 33% of the women said, often in capital letters, that
No,
they hadn’t had any such. Straight women were more apt to have homosexual fantasies, maybe because men find them so scary.
Here’s what some of your neighbors had to say.

A twenty-one-year-old woman wrote:

I am straight and I have thoughts about sex with my best girlfriend, but don’t know that I would ever act upon that fantasy.
I would like to see what it would be like to pleasure her and have her do the same to me. I’m really curious to know whether
it is different—better—with a woman since, presumably, she knows pretty much what another woman wants.

A forty-seven-year-old man wrote:

I don’t think I have homosexual tendencies, although I have a little secret, the one thing I never told anyone about. I engaged
in a foursome once and I have mentioned to people how it was boy–girl. I will admit to you that the girls did convince us
guys to give each other head. I licked his cock and he licked mine. I couldn’t come, but he came in my mouth and I swallowed
it. I was never so embarrassed, and later literally shook at the behavior. We never talked about it again.

A thirty-two-year-old man wrote:

I have had homosexual fantasies, but they always seem better as fantasies. So when I actually see guys naked, it does absolutely
nothing for me.

A thirty-six-year-old woman wrote:

I wonder what it would be like to touch another woman’s body— her breasts, her hair, her butt, her pussy. I also wonder what
it would be like to have my face between her legs or sixty-nine with her. I wonder how different, if at all, receiving oral
sex would be for a woman versus a man. Please understand that I can’t imagine ever actually doing this.

A nineteen-year-old woman wrote:

I do dream about being with another woman, but I believe if I were ever to act it out it would ruin the fantasy. Besides,
I am too old to be experimenting with stuff like that now. And of course it would require cheating on my husband, which I
would never do.

A twenty-two-year-old man wrote:

I do have homosexual fantasies, although I don’t think I could ever carry one out, partly because I’ve not met a man I fancied
at all yet. My most vivid fantasy is being forced to have a man fuck my mouth.

A sixty-year-old man wrote:

No fantasies about being gay but I like to fantasize about watching homosexual women doing it to each other, especially performing
oral sex. That must be a joy! So many juices for pleasure. If I were a woman, I think I would prefer to be homosexual!

A fifty-nine-year-old straight man wrote:

If I were the second male with a woman, I could put his member inside her with my hands if needed. Doing a double penetration
would be on the agenda, too.

A thirty-three-year-old woman wrote:

I am straight but I have fantasized about being with another woman just to know what it would be like and to pleasure my partner
who, I know, would want to watch.

A fifty-one-year-old woman wrote:

I would like to know how it feels to have a woman make love to me. I hear there is much gentleness and that it’s very special.

A twenty-six-year-old woman wrote:

Yes, I do, and they’ve been increasing in frequency since moving to a city where bisexuality’s more accepted. I think one
of the reasons I fantasize so much is because I’ve never done it; who knows, maybe I’ll kiss a woman and won’t like it at
all.

I think women’s bodies are beautiful, in a different way from men’s bodies—which I also love. I’m fascinated by the idea of
touching a woman’s breasts and belly, the softness of it as compared to the hardness of a man’s body. I’m a little nervous
about it, since it’s an entirely new thing for me, and I haven’t really had any opportunities to act out on it. I’m working
on it, though. I think I’d want it to be someone I don’t know well, but someone who’s inherently sexy—someone who’s attractive
and just has sex appeal, male or female.

A twenty-three-year-old woman wrote:

A few times I’ve dreamed that someone was giving me oral sex and I open my eyes to find out it’s a woman whom I don’t know.
My husband is watching from a chair across the room. I wake up really turned on.

A twenty-five-year-old woman wrote:

Several of my girlfriends and I were joking around with some guys at a party and told them we were going to so-and-so’s hot
tub to play with each other. All the guys went wild. I had a friend once who would have done something like that but I don’t
know where she is now. We used to dance together at parties and the guys would go crazy. We are both straight, but are also
extremely open-minded and daring.

A thirty-five-year-old woman wrote:

I have had fantasies about being with another woman. It starts with passionate kissing and soft teasing rubs then moves on
to oral sex play and fingering. We use vibrators and double dongs on each other. Finally I got so curious that I tried it.
It was better than my fantasy. Yum!

A forty-one-year-old woman wrote:

Occasionally I fantasize about being forced to have sex with another woman while being watched by one or more men. In real
life, however, I have no desire to experiment with another woman. I would probably be repelled by it.

A twenty-seven-year-old man wrote:

I have had homosexual fantasies. Mostly they involve a woman and a confirmed homosexual. The hot and lovely woman gently breaks
down my defenses, getting me to let the guy touch me, then I touch him, he sucks me, I suck him, finally he takes my ass.

A thirty-one-year-old man wrote:

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