Never to Keep (Accepting Fate #1) (5 page)

The man snoring softly beside me was engaged to be married. The man who’d been deep inside me for hours had promised his never-ending love and fidelity to someone else. His loving fiancée probably thought he was jerking off to the picture of her itty bitty titties when, in reality, he was lying in a hotel bed with me after having been fucked into a coma.

My thoughts returned to Ethan. The thought of him in someone else’s bed hurt like a bitch, but at least he’d ended things with me before he acted. What my stranger had done was exponentially worse. The notion that I had unknowingly contributed to the future Mrs. Stranger’s devastation was the last thought I had as the glaring red numbers on the digital clock flipped over to midnight, ending the worst day of my life. It was way past time to leave.

It didn’t take long to get dressed, because the few clothes I had were still in a pile near the door. I took one more look at the asshole spread out on the disheveled bed. I didn’t understand how he could sleep like a baby after committing the ultimate betrayal. I shut the door quietly behind me and fled to the elevator that would carry me two floors up to my room.

Madison

The scorching rain from the showerhead beat down as I washed every inch of my body. No matter how hard I scrubbed, I couldn’t rid myself of his smell. My skin was almost as red as my car when I stepped out of the shower nearly an hour later, feeling just as dirty as I had when I’d stepped in.

Both my faith and dignity had evaporated in less than twenty-four hours. I could hear my
abuela
chiding me from beyond the grave,
“Chicas buenas no deben comportarse como putas.”

“Yes, I know good girls shouldn’t behave like harlots,” I said as if my dead grandmother could hear me. “Maybe I’m not a good girl after all.” How could I be upset that he turned out to be a rat bastard when I had practically begged him to fuck me? I lay down on the hotel bed and closed my eyes, welcoming the darkness that enveloped my mind.

*

“I, Ethan, take you, Madison, as my wedded wife, to have and to hold from this day forward. I promise to love, honor, and cherish you, forsaking all others, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, as long as we both shall live.”

Ryan winked at me over Ethan’s shoulder, his smile overflowing with love.

“With this ring, I thee wed and pledge my love and faithfulness to only you forever.” A simple gold band slid onto my waiting finger.

“I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride.”

The familiar dream pulled me abruptly from my slumber. Coming to terms with my new reality would be next to impossible. I wasn’t sure how I could accept the fact that Ryan wouldn’t be there on my special day—and neither would Ethan.

My head was pounding as I climbed out of the unfamiliar bed and walked to the bathroom. I didn’t think I’d drunk enough to justify a hangover, but at least I hadn’t spent the night on the cold tile floor with my arms wrapped around the toilet.

After my biological needs had been met, I grabbed my overnight bag from the closet and dug through it for something to wear. I dressed quickly in a pair of worn-out jeans and an oversized football jersey, and then gave myself a once-over in the mirrored closet doors. Although I was verging on homely, I didn’t look nearly as bad as I felt.

“Shit,” I muttered to myself when I pulled my hair up in a sloppy ponytail and discovered that one of my earlobes was bare. My mother had given me the earrings I’d worn the night before for my sixteenth birthday, and they were the only pair I owned that didn’t turn my ears green.

For over an hour, I tore the room apart in search of the small sapphire that dangled from a golden hook. Although all I wanted to do was leave, I decided to retrace my steps through the hotel in a last-ditch attempt to find it. I would not, however, be knocking on the asshole’s door. Nothing was worth seeing him again.

Steeling my stomach, I pressed the call button for the elevator. Thankfully the car was empty, so I thoroughly inspected the marble floor for any sign of gold or blue during the short trip to my first stop two floors down. I was glad no one was waiting to get on when the doors opened, since I was still on my hands and knees.

Staggering to my feet, I stepped out of the elevator car before the doors began to close. As I turned the corner toward the asshole’s room, my eye caught a glint of light bouncing off of a blue stone a few feet away. Pushing aside memories of being carried over his shoulder, I picked my earring up and turned to head back to the elevator alcove.

A door slammed shut behind me, and I looked over my shoulder reflexively. My stomach twisted. I ran the remaining distance to the elevator and pressed the arrow. Fortunately, the doors opened at once—the car that had dropped me off was still there.

I stabbed the button to close the doors what felt like a thousand times before the damn thing obeyed. It was too late. With mere inches to go, a hand sporting thick acrylic nails darted between the shiny doors.

The woman stepped in and hit the button for the floor above mine. Her long red hair was matted in the back, and her pale green eyes were cloudy. No one looked good when taking the walk of shame, especially not when wearing a dress that reminded me of a giant Dreamsicle.

Her lips curled into a smirk when she caught me cataloging her disheveled appearance. “Best man,” she gloated. “He’s an absolute beast between the sheets.”

If there was any trace of a good girl left inside of me, it vanished when the doors opened on my floor. “Did his sheets still smell like me? I warmed them up for you.” A spark of satisfaction surged through me when the smugness on her face morphed to indignation. I walked away with my head held high before she could form a comeback.

Abuela
would have been very disappointed with me.

Sawyer

My phone rang as soon as I landed at LAX. “Ramsay,” I snapped into my Bluetooth headset without looking at the screen. I didn’t care that my bad mood was on full display; anyone who didn’t like it could kiss my ass. I grabbed my carry-on bags and headed toward the front of the plane.

“Hi, my name is Marina, and I’m trying to reach Sawyer Adam Ramsay. Is that you?” For a moment, I’d hoped it was the girl from the hotel, but the voice on the phone didn’t speak with the same rhythm. I stepped around a slow-as-fuck old lady on the stupidly long and narrow jetway.

“That’s my name.” It was probably a scam. I would have hung up if I’d had a free hand. I’d likely be trampled by the sea of bodies racing to the terminal if I stopped long enough to disconnect the call. It was easier to listen for another minute until I made it to the building.

“Believe it or not, you’re the third Sawyer Ramsay I’ve spoken to, and I want to make sure I have the right person.” I could feel the nervous energy in her voice. I was concentrating on maneuvering in front of a family with six small children when she said the words that stopped me dead in my tracks. “Were you adopted as a newborn about twenty-five years ago?”

I nearly toppled over when several people ran into me. “Y-yes,” I cleared my throat and tried again. “Yes.” The loud curses of the other passengers made it hard to hear the phone. I wanted to tell them all to shut the fuck up instead of moving to a quieter place. In the end, I chose the option that wouldn’t result in my arrest.

“I think I’m your sister—well, half-sister. I would like to talk to you in person, to see if the information I have matches up with what you know. I’m off for a couple of weeks, and I’m able to fly to wherever you are.” She sounded as excited as the little girls in my class at Christmas time.

“How do I know you’re legit?”

“I’ll meet you anywhere you want. I can text you a picture of my mother—our mother—so you can look for a family resemblance.”

“Where are you now?” I walked past the security guard on the way to baggage claim.

“I actually just got back to Los Angeles. I’m still at the airport.”

Small fucking world.

“Meet me by baggage claim carousel A-three as soon as you can.”

“I’ll be there in ten,” she replied.

I dropped one of my carry-on bags on a chair and ended the call.

Almost everyone from my flight was gone by the time she arrived. My jaw hit the floor. Marina fucking Alexander surveyed the area before her eyes found me. Tate Parker and a man the size of a school bus followed closely behind her.

“Sawyer?” she asked. I stared at her for a long moment as she came my way.

“Yeah.” I closed the short distance between us, my bags completely forgotten. “This has to be a mistake; we can’t be related. I mean, you’re Marina Alexander, and I’m nobody.”

“I don’t think it’s a mistake, and you are somebody. You’re my big brother, among other things.” Her smile lit the entire room. She was often referred to as one of the most beautiful women in the world. Thank God I’d never been attracted to her like that.

“Ma’am, we need to move. This area isn’t secure.”

The rumbling bass voice drew Marina’s attention to the men who flanked her. “How rude of me. Sawyer, this is my friend, Tate Parker.” It was common knowledge that they had been dating for years. “And, this is our bodyguard, Sam.” The enormous dude to her left gave me a curt nod.

“Do you want to go somewhere more secure and talk?” I asked. Sam was right; the baggage claim area would fill up again soon, which would compromise her safety and privacy. I was surprised by the surge of protectiveness I felt toward her. Before now, I’d never met anyone I shared blood with, so maybe it was a normal reaction. “I work at an elementary school about thirty minutes from here. The kids are still on summer break, so there won’t be many people there.”

“Sounds perfect. Our driver is waiting outside. We’ll give you a lift to your car and then follow you to the school.” She lifted my duffle bag from the chair behind me.

“I can get that,” I protested and unsuccessfully tried to take it from her. The woman was incredibly strong.

“Why do men always equate boobs with helplessness?” I’m not too proud to admit that the determined look on her face scared me a little bit.

“You know, Del,” Tate interjected, “you don’t always have to be in charge.”

She sighed. “I know.” She placed the bag in his outstretched hand. He seemed good for her.

*

I held open the classroom door for my guests and let it close once everyone was inside.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you this happy before.” Tate smiled at my sister with unadulterated love in his eyes.

“Can you blame me? I thought I was all alone in this world, and now I have a brother!” She bounced on her toes and turned her attention back to me.

“It’s so cool that you’re a teacher.” Marina looked around the room with the wonder of a child.

“It’s fun. This will be my third year teaching fourth grade. The kids are great at this age, so full of energy and curiosity.”

“It’s admirable that you teach in an underprivileged neighborhood,” Tate said as he looked through the barred window.

“Please, back up, Mr. Parker. There may be bars on the windows, but I bet the glass isn’t bullet proof.” The huge bald man made a move toward the slender actor. Almost all of the drive-by shootings in the neighborhood happened after dark, but I couldn’t fault his thoroughness.

The actor took a seat at the small table I used for reading groups, and his bodyguard seemed to approve of his new location. Marina and I joined Tate at the round table while Sam moved to the opposite corner of the room to keep watch.

“These kids don’t have much, and neither does the school. I try to do as much as I can for them, but it’s hardly enough.” I looked around the room that was far too small for the number of students on my roster. “I tutor kids with learning disabilities after school. We usually crowd around this little table.” I tapped the yellow melamine surface. “This community really needs a rec center, so the kids have a safe place to go. I’m working on a grant proposal to get the project funded.”