Reflection (3 page)

Chapter 5

After what seems a really long day at the office, I drop my bags inside my doorway and make my way to the bedroom. I take twenty minutes to decide what to wear, then I shower, dry my hair and put my make-up on. I’m ready with half an hour to spare. I pour myself a small glass of wine, knock it back and order a taxi and think about Bernard whilst I wait.

I arrive at the restaurant and step out of the taxi, that’s when I see him, stood outside waiting for me, ok so he looks cute… in his jeans and blazer but he’s absolutely not Adam, nowhere near.

“Hi Tom” I say as I walk towards him, I watch as he checks me out

“Wow Olivia, even better in the flesh than the photos”

“Thank you” he raises his elbow for me to take and escorts me into the restaurant

As we are shown to our table I quickly glance around the restaurant, it’s beautiful, with dim lighting and red booths. Tom stands aside and lets me sit first “Thank you” I say as I sit and watch as he takes a seat opposite me.

“So Olivia, tell me about your life, what have you been doing since leaving college?”

I watch as he leans forward, he has the cutest little dimples when he smiles, it’s funny how dimples look cute on Tom but on Adam they’re sexy as hell “Well, I got a job with a recruitment agency, stayed there for a few years before a friend and I decided to start our own company, he now runs another company, so I run ours, we have five people working for us and we are doing really well, what about you, what have you been up to?”

He smiles at me again “I design software then sell it on”

“Oh” that was a bit short “Do you work for yourself and what kind of software do you design?”

I sit and listen all the time not having a clue what he is on about. I just don’t get computer talk at all

“So are you married?” he asks

“No, I wouldn’t be here if I was” what the hell does he think of me

“Any serious boyfriends?”

“A couple, none that I want to talk about” I look up as the waiter brings us the menu’s I’m glad for the change of subject

We look at the menus and order, as I watch the waiter leave my eyes turn towards Tom again “What about you married any serious girlfriends?”

“Well remember Snooky from college? We had a bit of thing for a couple of years but she went off with somebody else, there has been nobody serious since”

“Oh that’s a shame” I say but I don’t remember her, I watch the waiter approach with our food and places it in front of us, thank goodness for that, the conversation was getting awkward I’m not sure this is going to work out.

After finishing our meal Tom orders another drink for us and starts talking about other things, he’s actually really funny and I laugh a lot. When he pays the bill, he helps me on with my coat and we walk outside

“Thank you Olivia for tonight, I hope we can meet again” he says as he flags a taxi down for me

“Yes that would be great, I’ve had a really nice time, thank you” he kisses my cheek and opens the door for me

“I will message you” he says

I nod and get in; I watch as he closes the door I give the driver my address and wave as we pull away.

I arrive back at my apartment to find Adam stood in my doorway, I can’t say I’m surprised… he approaches me as I reach my door

“Adam”

“Liv, I’ve been waiting ages, you’ve changed the locks, where have you been?”

“Adam that is none of your business, we are over remember?”

“No Liv we are NOT”

“What do you want Adam?” I say stepping closer to him, he just stops and looks at me “Adam what do you want?” I say again, his hand moves up to my face as his thumb strokes my cheek “Adam” I say stepping back

“Liv please, I have done nothing wrong”

“Then tell me” my voice getting a little louder

“Liv I can’t, I’m sorry I want to but I can’t”

I turn to open my door “Goodnight Adam” I stop as he grabs my arm and turns me back to face him “Fuck I love you Liv” he says as his lips meet mine, I hold out for about three seconds before I kiss him back, oh my God his kiss is better than I remember, my hands reach up and hold the back of his neck pulling him to me. Then I remember, I pull my mouth from his and slap his face, while he is stunned from the slap I quickly turn and open my door, I’m through and the lock on before the banging starts, I walk to the kitchen and pour myself a glass of wine, I quickly drink it down and pour myself another. I walk back to the hallway as the banging stops and then I hear shouting I presume its Gary from next door telling Adam to go. I walk to the door and look through the spy hole, I watch as Adam holds his hands up and then turns and leaves. I walk back to the kitchen and sit at the table and sigh, my phone rings, I reach and pull it from my bag, its Adam, I let it ring and place it on the table, I watch as it rings non-stop for a full three minutes before I answer it

“What?”

“Liv, please”

“Adam, unless you are going to talk leave me alone” I end the call and leave my phone in the kitchen and go to bed it takes ages to get to sleep thinking about Adam then Tom.

Chapter 6

The next couple of days pass without much happening. I can’t seem to concentrate at work, Adam’s PA drops of my coffee as usual but there is no word from him. Tom messaged me and asked to take me to the cinema I agreed although I really don’t think I’m ready for another relationship yet, perhaps I will tell him that tonight.

Tom is again waiting for me when my taxi pulls up, he steps up to the car and opens the door

“Olivia, you look lovely”

“Thank you Tom” I pay the driver and step out taking the hand that Tom offered

“Which film would you like to see?”

“Oh I don’t mind you choose” I reply wondering why I agreed to come, there isn’t even anything I want to see

He starts talking about various films as we make our way into the cinema when suddenly Tom stops, I lift my head up and see Adam stood in front of Tom, I meet his eyes and see his blue eyes blazing straight into mine

“Liv, who is this?” Oh ok he’s definitely angry, very angry.

I stutter when I start to answer but eventually answer “Adam, this is Tom. Tom this is Adam, he’s an old friend” I look between the two men, what the hell am I thinking. Adam can take my breath away with just a look from those blue eyes and Tom has no effect on me what so ever.

Adam holds his hand out to shake Tom’s, which he does then says “Nice to meet you, Adam” my eyes dart to Tom, I get the feeling that he knows Adam and the look on his face tells me that he doesn’t like him, Tom then turns to me “Come on Olivia, we don’t want to miss the start” he grabs my hand and pulls me away, I look over my shoulder at Adam and I’m not sure if it’s disappointment or what on his face.

I am more or less pulled in and shoved into my seat by Tom, he hasn’t spoken to me since we saw Adam outside, which is fine because now I know that this is a mistake and I won’t be going out with him again. I try to concentrate on the film but my head just won’t follow it. After a very long two hours the film finishes and my hand is taken and I’m again pulled outside.

“Let’s go for a drink” it’s the first thing he has said since meeting Adam and all I want to do is go home

“Tom I had a nice evening but I’ve got a headache so if it’s ok with you I will just make my way home now” I say as I look at him hoping he’ll buy my excuse and not question it. The look in his eyes is dark, very dark and it scares me a bit and before I know what’s happening I’m being shoved into a bar across the street, he orders me a wine and hands it to me and pulls me to a table in the corner.

“Tom speak to me, you are making me very nervous” he just looks at me, the same dark look still laced in his eyes “Please Tom either talk to me or let me go home”

“Why did you string me along if you still have feelings for that Adam guy?”

“Tom, Adam and I are over, it’s been that way for a little while”

“Hmm, well perhaps you need to tell HIM that” he almost spits at me

“I need the toilet I’ll be back in a tick” I say grabbing my bag and making my way to the bathroom, once inside I grab my phone and quickly dial Charlie’s number, luckily she answers on the second ring.

“Thank fuck for that Charlie. I need you to come and get me, I’m in a sticky situation and I need you to pick me up, now… like this second”

“What the fuck has happened Olivia?”

“Just come get me I will explain later, I’m at The Owl, come now”

“On my way, hold tight”

I quickly put my phone away and walk back to the table, Tom is still sat there just staring into space.

“Tom”

“What? I can’t believe you lead me on?”

“I didn’t lead you on, I was really enjoying your company until you turned on me tonight”

“I don’t believe you Olivia”

“Well Tom, believe it or not it’s true”

We sit in silence for another ten minutes before the bar door opens and in bursts Charlie, I watch as she looks around the bar, spots me then almost runs over

“Olivia thank Christ you’re here, I need your help… it’s my Dad, he’s in hospital”

I quickly stand “Of course, sorry Tom I will call you” I move around the table and hug Charlie, we are about to move when Tom grabs my arm and stands in front of me

“I will call you and you WILL answer, Olivia” he either doesn’t recognise Charlie or he just ignores her

I pull my arm away from him and walk around him and follow Charlie outside. She stops outside the door and turns to me

“What the fuck is going on?”

“Shit I don’t even know, just get me away from him”

We quickly walk to her car and jump in, making sure to lock the doors behind us. She starts the engine and pulls away, as we go back past The Owl Tom is stood outside watching us.

“Shit Charlie he really scares me, you know”

“What the hell happened? Anyway I told you he was weird, sort of handsome, but weird”

I tell her about meeting Adam and how he behaved after, she comes back to mine and has a drink, we sit on the sofa chatting when her phone rings, she picks it up and ends the call

“Oh no, another one bites the dust?” I say

“Yeah he was a prat, it was one of those where the sex was good but the conversation was completely dead”

“Shit Charlie what are we like?”

“I know I don’t think we will ever find men worthy of us Olivia” she says laughing

“I think I already found mine, everything was perfect until his secret thing”

“What are you going to do?”

“Nothing, there is nothing I can do but carry on with my life and hope that a second, just as worthy man comes along, one that can make my pulse race with one look and my skin heat with just one touch, the mad, unexplainable, utterly brilliant kind of love… Oh God, Charlie will I ever find that again?”

Chapter 7

The next week goes by really uneventful, my coffee is delivered, as it always has been by Adam’s assistant, each with a handwritten note.

Monday’s was
–
You never know what you have until you have lost it

Tuesday’s
–
My heart longs for yo
u
.

Wednesday’s
–
I just can’t be without you

Thursday’s
–
I love you, Li
v
.

Friday’s
–
Please forgive me, my life is worthless without you in it

Friday’s did get to me, I did have a tear in my eye as I read it and whilst I fully agree with that statement it doesn’t change anything, not a single thing. I file the cards in my bag. I’m meeting Charlie for a drink tonight so that’s something I guess I can look forward to. I lock up at work after everyone else has left and walk to my car, I’m glad it’s still light outside… I notice Adam’s car is not there, I’ve been having a slight feeling like I’m being watched all day. I open my car, slide into my seat and quickly lock the doors behind me. Charlie is meeting me at my place for some food before we go out. I park my car, the same feeling of being watched is still present, I look around and see Gary and Izzy from next door just about to go inside, I quickly get out of the car and sprint across the road saying hello to them before I reach them. I walk into the building chatting to them and soon forget my feelings. I arrive at my apartment and there is Charlie, sat by the door waiting for me.

“Bloody hell Boo, about time”

“Sorry, got caught up at work” I say walking around her and opening the door, she follows me in. After arguing for about twenty minutes about what food to have, we place an order for Indian, and we both go to shower.

We eat, finish getting ready and make our way to the local pub and I tell Charlie about how I keep thinking that I’m being watched.

She laughs “Boo you were always a bit jumpy, remember why I call you Boo?”

“Yeah but I still say that jumping out on people isn’t and never will be funny”

“I know but most people don’t wet themselves, do they?”

“Fuck off Charlie I was five”

“Nineteen, more like”

“I was five and you know it” I say, knowing she is right

We walk into the pub laughing and order a couple of glasses of wine and sit at the bar, we are having a good chat about everything when I see Charlie’s shoulders drop

“What’s wrong?”

“It’s Adam and his friends… they’ve just come in”

“Oh” I say looking over my shoulder, my eyes immediately spot Adam, he is wearing black jeans and a black t shirt, he has stubble I feel my eyes water as I look at him, I quickly turn back to Charlie

“Fuck…that man is hot” she says

“I know if you think he looks hot with his clothes on you should see him with them off… no actually scratch that, I don’t want you to see him naked”

“I would love to see him naked, shit Boo he’s coming over here…”

I turn as he stands next to me

I watch as he nods at Charlie then turns to me “Liv”

“Hi Adam”

“It’s good to see you”

“And you”

“I’ve been a bit caught up with work, do you have a minute to talk?”

I turn to Charlie she nods and I stand from the bar stool and follow him across to a quiet corner

“What do you want, Adam?” it’s easier on me if I’m horrible to him

“I just want you to know that I haven’t given up on us, I’ve had this deal going through at work and we have just finalised it, that’s why we are out”

“That’s great for you, well done” I reply

“Yeah just sold some software, got an amazing deal”

“That’s great and what about the other thing?”

“I’m trying to sort it Liv, I just need a month or two”

“A month… or two”

“Yes it will be sorted and I will be able to explain everything, will you wait for me?”

“We will see, contact me when you are ready to talk” I turn to walk away, he grabs my hand

“Liv please, wait for me?”

“What kind of girl do you think I am Adam? After all I’m still in love with you”

“What about that Tom?”

“That was a mistake and only the cinema Adam we weren’t planning a wedding”

“Good stay away from him Liv?”

I nod my head and walk back toward Charlie, I see one of Adam’s friends chatting to her, I watch as she throws her hair over her shoulders, a sure sign she is flirting I slide back onto my stool

She leans around him to ask me “Everything alright Boo?”

“Yeah, you want another drink?

“Oh we have champagne from Richard here, he works for Adam”

“Hi and thank you very much”

He nods his head and tells Charlie he will speak to her later, I know exactly what she is going to say as soon as he leaves

“Christ Boo did you see him?”

“Yes I did”

“I think I may be lucky tonight if I play my cards right”

“No doubt and in love again by the morning”

“Fuck off Boo” she says laughing

We drink another bottle sent over from Adam and his friends, Richard has popped over and spoken to Charlie several times, when the barman shouts time, everybody starts to leave. We grab our bags and get up from our seats

“Shit Charlie, I feel pissed”

“Yeah, me too”

I start to giggle and can’t stop, when I look back at Charlie she is whispering to Richard again

“Boo?”

It’s the same old routine “Yeah I know, I can get a taxi by myself…call me tomorrow” she leans over and kisses my cheek “Be careful” I whisper, I turn and walk as straight as I can to the door and step outside, wow when the fresh air hits me I’m even more drunk than I thought, I walk to the curb and raise my hand for a taxi, luckily almost immediately one pulls up, I shout my address to the driver and open the door

“Liv”

“Adam” I say, turning towards him

“I will make sure you get home”

“Ok” I watch as he gets in the taxi, he looks like he hasn’t been drinking, as the taxi pulls away I feel him reach for my hand.