Royally Screwed: British Monarchy Revealed (6 page)

The UK investigation discovered that Diana’s seatbelt was jammed in the retracted position.  Didn’t that happen to Diana all the time? I’m sure it did, because she never bothered to drive with her seatbelt. Just because there are hundreds of pictures of her wearing her seatbelt as she got out of her car, doesn’t mean that she always used her seatbelt every time she got in the car.

If anyone bothered to ask the question, why did the ambulance take so long to get from the tunnel to the hospital, i.e. why did it take nearly 2 hours to drive 3.25 miles, or why wasn’t the most famous woman in the world helicoptered out to London within minutes?  Again we are asking the wrong questions.

We know that Paris is a very beautiful city and Diana probably wanted to see parts of Paris that she had never really seen before at 4.00 a.m. in the morning, And who says there was a time factor with her arrival at the hospital and just because nothing was ready at the hospital for her, no blood type ready for infusions, doesn’t mean anything untoward happened.

Just because, the ambulance stopped for ten minutes outside the gates, they are exceptional Gates, or that the ambulance drove past hospitals that were closer, I think we are all just being picky and small minded and probably nothing evil or dastardly happened in the ambulance.

So let’s disregard the ambulance, because… well just because it doesn’t make sense to anyone who has actually bothered to look. And let’s focus on the other vehicles that were there that night, Lets investigate the white Fiat Uno, the black Fiat Uno, the white Mercedes, the black Mercedes, the motorbikes, well actually let’s not because it’s too confusing.  And who’s to say that they were actually there, because nobody but passers-by actually saw them and there was no real evidence that they were actually there anyway on any cameras, oh yes, they were turned off, I completely forgot.

There was some broken glass belonging to the Fiat that ended up at the Inquest, so we know it was actually there, but why it was there and what it was doing leaving remnants of glass inside the Mercedes is anybody’s guess.  Probably not worth bothering about.

And just because the owner of this car was a part-time MI6 agent and this man, James Andanson was found burned to death with a bullethole in his head and the car was locked from the outside.  Good trick but it doesn’t mean anything,

So forget the cars, let’s investigate the blood belonging to the 3 x’s over the limit driver, Henri Paul.  What was weird was that this blood had an amount of carbon dioxide in it that was enough to collapse a moose, which was truly weird because if he died on impact, he would have been unable to take a breath. How spooky is that? Even more spooky, when you remember that during the summing up of the Inquest by Lord Scott Baker, the French sent an urgent message ‘DON’T TRUST THE BLOOD!!!’  But Lord Scott Baker instructed the jury to ignore it, because it meant nothing, obviously.

Another thing that meant nothing was that two senior MI6 officers plus the queen’s private secretary where allegedly in Paris on the night of the crash… but that was probably just a coincidence.

So, if we can just accept that Diana was a paranoid, flighty, unstable female.  Accusing people of spying and bugging her rooms, just because she found bugs doesn’t mean she was being bugged. That’s just silly.

And all those crazy letters and notes she wrote to family, friends and lawyers, saying she was sure people were trying to kill her and leave the path clear for her ex-husband to remarry. Well, that was just complete paranoid nonsense.

http://www.observer.com/files/full/dianafuneral.jpg

Spin Cycle

(A history of how we get screwed on a daily basis)

Many years before there were factories and sweat shops, people made clothes by weaving cloth and spinning flax, hemp and wool.

Selective breeding of sheep creates wool; wool is then placed on something called a spindle – long, pointy, thin stick – which is then twisted to create something called a thread or yarn.

A yarn is of course another word for a tale or story, and when this yarn gets twisted by the spindle, (like the truth in a story) it gets spun.  We all get pulled in and follow it like a bunch of sheep, thus completing the full circle or ‘spin’.

As a note of historical interest, the inventor of this spindle, was a Mr. James Hargreaves, of Lancashire, England, who noted that even when the spindle was turned on its head, it still continued to spin…wow!  This all took place in 1770, when at the same time; a Walter Allcock invented the TOILET PAPER ROLL!  Spooky, that the spindle and the toilet roll were invented at the same time! There’s a connection there – and I will let you make it.

So, long before we were born, the Palace had begun spinning yarns, telling stories and twisting the truth.  In 1714 George I and the very Germanic House of Hannover, replaced the House of Stewart and moved into Buckingham Palace.  This extremely Teutonic family barely spoke a word of English.

They were surrounded by German servants and advisors; and they had no real need to become involved with the English!  Just picture a mini Deutschland at the top of Pall Mall.

Then at the turn of the century, the House of Hannover was replaced by the house of Saxe-Coburg-Gotha. 
How terribly British!

This whole situation was made even more bizarre when in 1914 England went to war with Germany!!  King George V was even an Honorary Field Marshall in the German army!  This situation and the name were never changed until 1917!! THREE YEARS LATER!!  What caused this devastating change? What inspired them to change their name from Saxe-Coburg-Gotha (very un- British) to Windsor (terribly British!)?  Yesterday we were a bunch of Germans and now we‘re English – what?

What was it that finally convinced the first family that it was probably a good idea to change their name?

In March 1917, the Kings first cousin, Nicholas II, the Russian Tsar, was lined up against a wall with his wife and children and shot by the Bolsheviks.  Oh!  If the powerful Romanovs could get knocked-off by the Russians, how safe would a family calling itself Saxe-Coburg-Gotha, in anti-German England, be?  At the time, it wasn’t even safe to walk down the street with your pet Dachshund munching a bratwurst.  Hey Presto, Chango!  ‘We’re British!’, ‘We’re Windsors!’, ‘How Marvelous!’, ‘Tootle Pip’, and all that.  Windsor sounded infinitely safer and the German Kaiser had the last laugh when he mentioned how eager he was to see the new Shakespearian drama of the “Merry Wives of
Saxe-Coburg-Gotha”.

After many meetings with Royal and Political advisors, a ‘Palace Spin Machine’ was created to manage and maintain the Royal image.  The Royal family were presented as England’s first family; one that the ‘Great British Public’ should emulate and admire.  A first family, with REAL family values, that were committed Christians and defenders of the Church and the Faith.  Somewhat humorous in itself as it was Henry VIII who was first proclaimed Defender of the Faith, by, none other than the Pope!  Because Henry wrote a book, defending MARRIAGE, which is risible, after he was called 'Defender of the faith'; He divorced his first wife; robbed the church; rid himself of wife number two and died a devout catholic in a protestant country!

Henry was a King infamous for placing his ‘needs’ above the needs of his country.  Now to be fair to Henry, in his heart he
WAS
England.  So if he needed a son, then England needed a son.  If he felt it necessary to get rid of his first wife, then England felt it necessary.  For him there was no distinction.  He was his own personal spin doctor.  No one could argue with him.  At the end of his life, when he went mad (symptoms of syphilis) England also went mad.

The first rule of Royalty is “duty to its country”!  If you want the diamonds, the money and the servants, that’s the deal.

Queen Elizabeth II has been unfailing in her duties to her country.  She presents herself to her country and the world as a leader of morality, manners and Godliness.  She’s the Queen – that’s her job!

Seventy years ago allegiances within the Palace were extremely divided when it came to the subject of Germany.  That’s why they ditched the name.  NOW they were the perfect Royal family!  This is where we come back to the spindle, the wool and the sheep.

You spin a story, you provide England with its first British Family, and then the country looks to you for an example of morality, manners and Godliness.  The wool is pulled over your eyes, you follow the story like a bunch of sheep and… voila… the spin is complete.  But the truth was stretched so thin at times, that the Saxe-Coburg-Gotha could have been the Hans Christian Andersons, there was more fantasy embroiled in this history you could almost consider it a ‘fairytale’.

The Queen’s great grandfather Edward VII and his brother, Albert could have alternatively been called the Brothers Grimm!  The truth is such grim reading.  The ‘happily’ married Edward was estimated to have slept with 1,500 women and was known as ‘a wastrel, a gambler and a whoremonger’ – Ya think?!   Dear uncle Albert was caught in a homosexual brothel during a raid, was known to be quite mad and eventually died of syphilis. The Palace would have you believe that this was the only time he set foot in such an establishment.  But I might point out, that if one was not of that particular persuasion then what on earth would persuade you to go there.

And it was one of the sons of Edward VII, the Duke of Clarence, who was alleged to be the infamous Jack the Ripper, although this was never proven.  Is this yet another colossal cover-up?

The Queen’s uncle, Edward VIII, (whose real name was David) was moody and spoiled with a ‘diminished intellectual capacity‘, possibly caused by a case of childhood mumps which had allegedly made him hairless and sterile.  Her father, George VI, (whose real name was Albert!) had a crippling stammer and throughout his childhood was forced to sleep with metal calipers on his legs as a cure for his severe knock-knees. 

He had three younger brothers, George, Harry and John.

John, the youngest, was born with epilepsy.  He was removed from the family at a young age and sent away to live on his own with a nurse.  He died at 13, alone and isolated.  Charming!  What a family!  They could call themselves “Munsters”, not “Windsors”!

George, (real name George) was handsome, talented and very bright, but a raging bisexual sex maniac.  It was rumored that he would jump a stranger in a taxi, and had a passionate two year affair with the playwright, Noel Coward and Lord Mountbatten. 

After his brother Edward abdicated in 1936, his social debonair skills made him the brother far more suitable to take the throne than the painfully shy, stammering Bertie.  But Baldwin - the Prime minister of the day - could not countenance dealing with his lifestyle and his close ties to Germany.  Bertie/George was thought to be the brother who was the most mutable and he also had another great advantage that his brother George didn’t - a stable family life, and his daughter Elizabeth.