Shadows Amongst Light (The Spy Who Loves Me) (12 page)

             
“All right, listen up because whether or not we get anyone to replace Noah physically we all need to be extra careful.”              

             
At the first sign of authority in Matt’s, voice everyone in the room shut up. More out of surprise, I think than anything else.

             
“I talked to one of my informants and I’ve found out some very disturbing things. Apparently, there’s some sort of meeting taking place outside the city this week. There’s a new player in the mix--someone we’ve never even heard of before. My informant told me that this guy seems to have an awful lot of power for someone new.”

             
Matt turned to me at that point. “Cameron, anything further on the document? Anything that might tell us what this meeting is all about. Because I’m hearing some very disturbing facts. Guys, if what my informants are telling me is true, it looks like the five top terrorist cells operating in our country are on the verge of working together. Someone apparently has managed to convince them to put aside all of their differences and egos and work together for one common goal.”

             
I knew in light of this new turn of events that it was time for me to tell Matt everything that I knew. However, I decided I couldn’t do it in front of the team. I would make it a point to call Matt later tonight. I needed one last chance to reach Judah. If that failed, I had to come clean.

             
“Matt, I’m close. I should know something more tonight.”   

             
“Wait--you’re saying you think the different factions cells are uniting?” Shane interrupted incredulously. “That’s insane Matt and you know it. It would never work. These people are all about being in charge. They’d never concede that to another leader.” Shane dismissed without a second thought.

             
“That may be Shane, but something is happening. Not all of what I told you just now came from informants. And even if a portion of it is true, I’m thinking anyone with enough persuasion to get these tough guys to agree on anything is dangerous. Anyone able to accomplish that can pretty much have complete control. There will be no stopping him folks. This could be the worst possible thing that could happen. We’re talking cataclysmic here folks so we need to get busy. Get your ear to the ground and find out what’s being said about this meeting about this new person. We need information and we need it yesterday.”

             
“Oh come on Matt. Surely, your snitches are exaggerating this whole thing. It’s ridiculous that we’re even considering this as real. They won’t listen to their own leaders half the time, what makes you think they’re going to listen to an outsider?” This was Shane attempt to assert his opinion. Had I not seen the proof that this was real, I would have never believed it myself.

             
“Shane, just shut up and let Matt finish,” I told him before turning back to Matt. “Is this as serious as it sounds? Who do you think this guy is?” I asked but I already knew. I’d met him several times already. I knew him to be Davis.

             
“Either my informant isn’t saying or he really doesn’t know. I’ll find out one way or another. If he’s keeping secrets, I’ll get them out of him. In the meantime, we need to pull out all the stops. I need you all working on this. Call in whatever favors are due you from whatever contacts you have. Until we know one way or another, plan to work on this alone. We’ll need to get back together tomorrow night and I will be expecting progress from everyone.”

             
“Tomorrow? You actual think we’re going to have time to find out anything by then? Matt, this is crazy. I want it on the record that I’m opposed to the way this is being handled,” Shane said angrily. Shane was determined to dismiss or challenge anything Matt had to say.

             
“Yes, well I don’t and since I’m in charge we’re doing it my way. So get used to it, Shane. If you don’t like the way I’m handling things then you’re certainly free to talk with Adam about it. However, I expect you and everyone else to be here tomorrow night with someone to contribute. Might as well get comfortable being here folks. Because if what I think is about to happen really is then you can expect to be meeting every single night for as long as it takes to figure this out. Cameron, I need something from you. Whatever you can get me as soon as possible.”

*****

              Once I was certain I was in the clear and no one from the team had followed me, I started in the direction of the last place I’d seen my brother. I knew that if I didn’t find Judah tonight there was absolutely nothing I could do to help him.

             
I waited there for hours and was almost ready to give up when he appeared.

             
Cameron,” The sound of my name could have been only a whisper but in the stillness around us, it sounded like a shout.

             
“Judah?”

             
“You shouldn’t have come here, Cameron. I told you it was dangerous.” Even as he said the words, my brother moved closer to me.

             
Then I stood before him looking at the man that was nothing like the boy of seventeen that I remembered. It was all there in his eyes. A coldness that depicted a killer. I knew that then everything I’d read about my brother was true.

             
However, he was still my brother. Some of that kid had to be left somewhere. We were family after all.

             
“Can I touch you?” I asked tentative for once. Now that I was face to face with my brother, I wasn’t sure how to react to him. I’d never been in this situation. I was on the opposite end from Judah. I didn’t know how to respond to my own brother.

             
“Yes,” I went into his arms after a moment’s hesitation. It felt awkward somehow. Accepting Judah as my brother especially after realizing who he was. We were both trying so hard. Judah was being very careful not to get too close to me, which surprised me. After all, this reunion had been a long time coming. I could almost see mom and dad smiling at me know.

             
I felt my brother’s hand came in contact with my weapon and he froze.

             
“It’s okay Judah. It’s only there as a precaution. I wasn’t sure...” I left of that sentence unsaid. Judah knew what I was. There was no need for explanation.

             
He pulled a little aback from me his fingers touching my face. I hadn’t realized until that moment that I was crying. My tears took us both by surprise.

             
“Cameron, don’t cry. Please--don’t cry.” My brother awkwardly tried to brush aside my tears. I could tell that it had been a long time since he’d touched another human the way he was with me.

             
“Can you stay with me for a little while Judah? Please, please don’t leave just yet.”

             
He slowly nodded before releasing me as if the very contact with me hurt. But then, maybe it was the just the reminders of what he’d once had. The family he’d once been a part of.

             
“We should find someplace safer than this. It’s too public. There are those from both sides watching us you know.”

             
I followed him inside an abandoned storefront where we found a couple of old chairs strewn around.

             
For a long time neither of us knew what to say to each other. We sat quietly listening to the sounds of the city outside the crumbling walls of the store.

             
“You know about mom and dad?”

             
He nodded. I knew that I had to ask the question I didn’t want to ask.

             
“Did you have anything to do with their deaths, Judah?”

             
The expression on my brother’s face was what hurt most of all. “No. No, of course not. How could you think that Cameron?”

             
“I don’t really know you anymore do I Judah. What happened to you? How did you become a part of it? How can you do those horrible? How could you do that to them, to their memory. Especially knowing everything that dad stood.” I had to ask at last.

             
“I can’t tell you details Cameron. I can’t. They’d kill me if they knew I was talking to you right now. All I can say is you don’t understand everything Cameron.”

             
“No? What don’t I understand Elijah.” I saw my brother’s expression shift only slightly at the mention of that name but it was enough to know I’d been right. He was Elijah Jacobs.

             
“So you know about that?” he said cautiously.

             
“I know everything. All about you, about the Red Jihad. Trust me Judah it’s been well documented. We’ve had you under surveillance for a long time now.”

             
“And you think you know everything, is that it, Cameron. You’ve read some information given to you by the Bureau and you think you know all about me.”

             
“Are you saying it’s not true?” When he merely watched me with those dead eyes, I lost it. “Tell me the fucking truth, Judah? Tell me that you aren’t the monster I’ve read about. Tell me how my brother, the boy that was so loving as a kid could turn into the emotionless killer that you are right now?” When he still didn’t answer, I went only wearily. “Or tell me that you didn’t do any of those things and I’ll try and help you Judah, but you have to be honest with me. Tell me the truth.”

             
He was silent for so long that I believed he wouldn’t answer me at all. “I told you, I can’t tell you anything Cameron.”

             
“You know they never stopped looking for you? They never gave up hope of finding you and bringing you back home again. It was all they lived for, for so long. They gave up so much of their life for you Judah I think you owe them something. So I want to know how you could do that to them.” Judah was silent...unyielding. Those empty eyes giving nothing away.