Through The Lens (32 page)

He dipped his head. 
“How could I not see it?” Reaching up, I drew him closer.  He pressed his lips
to mine quickly before pulling away. “I wouldn’t have been able to live with
myself if you didn’t make it.”

“So they got him?” I
asked. When he only stared, I said, “Mr. Miller.”

Nodding to me, I
gripped his hand.  How would anyone have guessed?  He seemed so sincere.  Then
the dots connected.  He’d taken photos of Allie and Carly.

“Did they find Lucy or
Allie?” I asked hopefully. 

He nodded. “It’s messed
up.  Lucy’s in the hospital here.  They are releasing Allie where she is.  It’s
bad, Jess.”  The guy had us all fooled.  Had he followed me to Ethan’s?  What
if Ethan hadn’t come?

Then I added, “Carly.” 
He shook his head and I left that subject alone for now. “Why would he do
this?” I asked.  I remembered the article that said a teacher was quoted as
saying Ethan had been doing drugs.  Had that been Mr. Miller?  Had he intended
to point the finger at Ethan all along or was he just convenient?  I didn’t ask
Ethan all of this because his expression was already haunted.  I didn’t want to
burden him more with maybe about Mr. Miller’s intentions. 

“So far he isn’t
talking,” he said.  My father cleared his throat. “They know,” he whispered
before fully pulling away from me.  I took that to mean, they knew I stayed
with Ethan and not Madison this weekend.

“You should go home. 
You’ve been here the last couple of days.  Now that you know she’s safe, you
should go get some rest,” my father said in a firm but not too stern voice.

“I’ll be back,”
declared Ethan much to my father’s chagrin.  He kissed my cheek and winked at
me before he left.

My Dad had many words
after he departed. “You lady, you are in a world of trouble.”

“Tom,” my mother
protested. “Can’t this wait until after she gets released from the hospital?”

Those however were my
famous last words.  To say I was grounded for life was an understatement.

Eventually, I was given parole by my
parents for a night to go to homecoming.  My father chaperoned us, it was
infuriating.  I’d messed up, but I hadn’t done have the things my sibs did. 
Gratefully, my father didn’t ride with us to the dance.  Instead, he
volunteered to help at the dance and opted to drive behind us there and back. 
Ethan couldn’t get closer than two inches to me all night.  I thought he might
get pissed, but he’d seemed more amused than anything else.

My sibs weren’t happy
with me either.  My getting caught had hampered their activities.  My Mom with
the flexibility of owning her own restaurant was home when we left for school
and there when we came home after school.  One of my parents was always home
now, which cut out some of the partying for my sibs because my parents checked
with other parents to verify where we were going.  Or rather where my sibs were
going, because I wasn’t allowed to leave the house.  My sentence was
indefinite.

After a month of
solitude, Madison and Bradley were allowed to visit me at my house. Ethan
however still didn’t have very many privileges to see me expect for the
occasional dinner he was invited to.  Until my parents’ house arrest lifted, I
couldn’t do anything else.  Ethan and I did a lot of hand-holding and kissing
in at school between classes and at lunch.  He even met me for running after my
Dad stopped following me in his car.  But even with that, they knew how long I
took.  So stolen kisses behind trees were all we got.

By Christmas, Ethan was
allowed over for supervised visits.  No, I was still on house arrest. 

“Is this anything like
your house arrest?” I’d teasingly asked him.

“I think I got off
better,” he’d said. 

Despite that all
suspicion was removed from Ethan in regards to Carly’s disappearance, his
record remained.  That was because the charges he had were for underage
drinking, driving and endangerment or something like that.

Carly had yet to be
found.  The prosecution was working on getting Mr. Miller to admit that he’d
taken her.  They’d found a ring she was known for wearing in his apartment. 
Still, he hadn’t spoken and had gotten a good lawyer, so I was told.

My feelings for Ethan grew
like a budding flower in spring.  As the weeks flew by, the layers of my heart
bloomed open until I couldn’t deny that I was full out in love with him.  Here
was a boy who could have any girl he wanted.  Yet he chose to stay with me even
through my parentally induced imprisonment.  I could not go to parties or even
a date out alone with him.

Once he could, Ethan
spent a fair amount of time at my house.  He ate dinner with us often.  My
parents were now well aware of his mother’s antics.  She’d mostly moved back
home.  A little thing about child protective services scared her straight. 
Still she spent her weekends in California, which was fine by Ethan.  They were
attending therapy to get over the grief they both felt from his father’s death
which was a good thing.

 By spring, I’d been
somewhat released.  Ethan and I were sprung to go out, alone.  I was sure it
was a result of good behavior and an awesome report card.  We didn’t test the
limits though.  Ethan was determined to play by the rules and remain in my
father’s favor.  Actually he and my Dad got pretty close.  Something changed between
the two when my Dad had a heart-to-heart with him about his little girl.  Ethan
seemed swayed by my Dad, but he wouldn’t tell me everything they talked about.

~~~

Prom night, Ethan
showed up in a convertible Bentley.  At least that is what he called it.  It
looked almost like a classic car but more fairytale like.  The top was down,
and we had a driver too.  It was more than romantic. It was magical.

“You are the most
beautiful girl I’ve ever seen,” he’d said at my door.

“Thank you,” I said,
standing in my silver floor-length dress.  It was a strapless gown that was
trimmed in metallic beading at the bodice and at the empire waist.  It was
backless except for the swath of silver that crossed over my waist, leaving
everything else exposed down to the small of my back.  The material floated and
flowed silk-like.  I felt beautiful when I heard Ethan say it and saw it in my
eyes. “You are very handsome yourself,” I said, adding to his ego I was sure. 
Ethan, although not vain, didn’t lack for confidence in that department.

Grinning, he took my
hand and led me to the car after my parents took a ton of pictures. 

“Are you ready?” he
asked, when we pulled up to the hotel that hosted the prom.

“Yes,” I said.  And I
was ready for a lot of things.

When we walked in, eyes
turned in our direction along with the flashing of cameras.  For a moment, I
had a flashback to when I’d left the hospital.  I was big news.  That along
with Allie and Ethan making headlines, I had a string of reporters waiting for
me.  Later, I’d been told that the hospital had donated the private room for me
in light of the events.  Normally, with our insurance my father had explained,
I wouldn’t have had a private room. 

But time had healed
some wounds.  When I tensed with each flash of the camera, Ethan held my hand steady
reminding me I was safe.  I, too, was talking to a therapist about my ordeal. 

It was when we were on
the dance floor, that I caught sight of Lucy.  She’d changed and become
withdrawn.  After the first week of her return at school, people stopped
hounding her.  It may have had a lot to do with Ethan’s protectiveness.  And
even I couldn’t get jealous of that.  He’s held people off and told them to
leave her alone.  Still, I felt sorry for her.    

Seeing her only brought
up thoughts about Allie.  She’d disappeared from life by her own choosing.  Her
family and she moved to an undisclosed location.  For now, her career was on
hold.  We were told she was getting help to overcome the what all she went
through and she hadn’t wanted to talk to anyone including Ethan and I. 

The case against Mr.
Miller hadn’t happened yet.  Thankfully, caught in the act of trying to kill
me, he was denied bail.  However, at some point, I may be put on the stand.  I
didn’t relish that idea.  Lucy, Allie, and I would forever be bonded in a sick
club of his victims.  Carly too.  It was said for her, it might have been just
a case of wrong place, wrong time.  It was speculated that she stumbled upon
him in the woods when he’d buried another girl.  He made his first mistake the
papers reported that night.  He had been preying on runaway girls and homeless
girls according to information leaked by someone in the know.  The girls he’d
taken were reportedly ones that wouldn’t be missed. 

It was further
speculated that Mr. Miller was hoping for Ethan to be caught to take any
possible suspicion away from himself.  So me and my big mouth went and gave him
motive and opportunity.  If he’d succeeded, it would have put the suspicion
further on Ethan and possibly put the final nail in his coffin. 

I must have stopped
dancing.  “Do you want something to drink?” Ethan asked, being ever patient
with me.  I nodded, feeling nervous.  It felt like my throat was closing all
over again. 

Looking away from Lucy,
I spotted Madison and Bradley, who waved madly.  They’d finally gotten past
their problems and were moving forward with their relationship. 

Earlier that day, Madison
said to me, “Tonight’s the night.”

She’d squealed in
delight.  I couldn’t help but be happy for her.  She had Bradley had gotten a
room in the hotel like many of the couples.

“Just be sure,” I’d
said among other things, giving her the friend speech but still telling her I
supported her decision.  I given Bradley the evil eye but not because I didn’t
trust he do right by her. “Promise me you’ll never hurt her,” I’d said. 

“Never,” he’d answered. 
And I believed him.

One of the other
updates was that Bradley and Ethan had become friends along the way.  I saw
them fist bump at the punch bowl while I chatted with Madison.  And it made me
smile.

Jenna was there.  Her
date, I didn’t know.  She and I had formed a somewhat of a truce.  We may never
be close like we used to be, but she would always be my sister. And somehow,
I’d have to find away to totally forgive her. She and I knew as much about each
other’s private life as we shared at the dinner table these days.  That would
have to do for now.  Also in the crowd was my brother.  Yes, Kyle had managed
to snag a cute senior who asked him to be her date tonight.  I just shook my
head wondering how many hearts he would break while I was off a college.

And Josh, he was there
with a red-haired girl who was a junior at our school.  Out of the corner of my
eye, I caught him looking at me from time to time.  He was headed to California
for college from what I heard. I had to wonder if I’d ever see him again once
he left.   In my head, I wished him the best.

Ethan and I could have
left like some couples and gotten a room in the hotel to mark the last big
night in high school, but we didn’t.  Ethan hadn’t pressed for our relationship
to go any further.  Not as though we had a lot of opportunity, still, I
appreciated his waiting for me to be ready. 

Feelings of anxiety
crept over me.

“Are you okay?” he
asked, handing me a drink.

He was drinking from
his cup when I sprang it on him. “I’m ready to have sex.”

Okay, my words were
blunt and I’d meant to say it another way.  But my nerves got the best of me. 
Ethan spit and coughed, angling his head so it didn’t get on my dress.”

His voice was horse,
like liquid had gone down wrong, his eyes squinty like he was still recovering
when he said, “You what?”

“I want it to be you
and tonight,” I said, patting him on his back.

Putting his drink down,
he pulled me out of the ballroom and found a dark corner and kissed me
thoroughly.

“Why tonight?” he asked
when he pried himself off me.  His arms were folded over his chest.  He didn’t
look like what I assume most boyfriends would after hearing that they might get
lucky.

“Because I’m ready,” I
said softly.

He searched my eye
bending to keep contact when I tried to duck my eyes away from his.  “I’m not
ready,” he said.

Confused and a little
put out that he was turning me down, I said, “Why?”

Taking my chin, he
lifted my head so that I had to stare in directly in the eye. “Because with
you, it will be everything it has never been with anyone else.”

Stunned, I let him lead
me back to the dance.  The last song of the night ended up being dedicated to
me by Ethan.  “Every road leads home to you,” he said along with the chorus of
the song. I couldn’t help the tears that formed in my eyes as we danced.  He clutched
onto me like I was his lifeline.  I clung to him and wondered when this dream
would end.

Instead of a hotel
room, Ethan proudly took me to the school-sponsored after-party, which wasn’t
as bad as it sounded.  There was laser tag, bull riding, poker, midnight mini
golf, and go-carts.  We’d changed and had a blast. As lame as it sounded, I had
an amazing time.