Desire Disguised (26 page)

“You were there when I needed you. You always have been.” He heard her sob, and he held her as tight as he dared. She’d faced so much, and it seemed he only added to her troubles, despite what she claimed. His love for her warmed and frightened him in equal measure.

“Cara, I know you’re grieving and your future is uncertain. What I told you earlier is still true and even stronger now. Whatever you want to give me, for however long, I’ll be happy to have.”

She sniffed and shifted her weight from foot to foot, glancing up at him as she did. The silence between them stretched.

“Would you stay tonight?”

“Yes.” Ben’s reply gusted out with relief. At least they would have tonight.

“Good. I’ll get you something to eat while you shower.”

* * * *

Ben had eaten like a machine after his shower, and in the time it had taken her to put things away in the kitchen, he’d fallen asleep in his chair; his dark head slumped to one side. Cara dimmed the lights, pulled back the covers on the bed, and after rousing him, led him to the bedroom where he fell down on the mattress as if his battery had run out. She stripped out of her robe and pajamas, crawled in next to him, and thought about what she wanted her future to be while she struggled to fall asleep.

He was sleeping soundly when she woke, still bleary from emotional upheaval and witnessing murder the evening before. Slipping away from the confines of his heavy, warm arm, Cara activated her datpad and found a message from Gina Healy confirming when she’d drop Mat off. The appointed time was over an hour away, which meant Ben could sleep longer.

Taking a deep breath and contemplating all the scenarios she’d run through in the night, she called up the shuttle flight reservations. She and Mat were scheduled to leave tomorrow. Her current alias and her brother’s glowed there on the passenger list alongside Soren’s. What she’d always thought of as her true identity was as much a lie as Cara Belasco was.

She wanted to doubt Soren’s last confession, but some uncomfortable part of herself had always known there was something more to her and Mat’s story. The something more included more siblings it seemed, the thought of which had nagged at her ever since Soren had uttered the words. Where were they? What had their lives been like? Would she ever see them? Had they even survived the assassination?

Cara considered her new-found heritage for a few moments. She wasn’t a La Torre if she didn’t want to be. Her slate was now clean. Soren’s death meant she didn’t have to play the old game any longer. An incredible lightness of spirit filled her as she realized she wanted to let it all go; all the expectations, fears, guilt. If she left or if they stayed, she was going to be Cara Belasco forever. She’d find her sisters and introduce herself as Cara. Once Mat was old enough, he could decide his own fate, go to the academy, and return to Tellus, whatever he liked. No, not Tellus. Never there.

With a sigh, Cara reviewed the instructions for using their remote account. There might be some clues hidden in those old files. She’d been too shaken the night before to even contemplate it. She read the headers and sub files, and nothing caught her eye. It never had and perhaps it never would. Accessing the information would take time; pings out, waits for data drops in the future.

Since they’d already been hidden from her for over a decade, she’d start searching for her sisters later. Tomorrow. After she made one adjustment. Just as she hit delete, she felt a broad hand slide up the back of her thigh and cup around her bare bottom. She heard Ben shift and then felt the warm weight of his body as he settled along her side. His head appeared over her shoulder as he glanced at the display in her hands before he nuzzled his stubbled chin into her neck. Her skin prickled at the welcome stimulation.

“Good morning.”

“And to you.”

“What are you doing?”

“Checking on Mat’s and my reservations.” His previously roaming hands went still on her back and breast.

Cara turned her head to look at his sleep-softened face. Other than his growth of whiskers she never would have guessed he had been through the previous evening’s stress. Ben was beautiful, and she loved his fine nose and intelligent eyes and gentle mouth. She only hoped she looked half as good. He blinked at her, dark eyelashes fanning against caramel skin.

“Still shipping tomorrow?”

Nerves tightened in her gut as she shrugged. “There’s something funny about that.”

He frowned and turned to focus on the data. “Is that the passenger manifest? Where are you and Mat? Are you using a new alias now? How will I find you if you use a different name?”

“No. I’m Cara, he’s Mat. We aren’t going to be anything else.” Ben’s ready assertion that he would track her down made her glow. She’d made the right choice with this man.

“But you’re not—” His voice trailed off, and he stopped scowling at the glimmering list of names on the display to peer at her.

“I canceled it.” Cara tightened her lips and waited for his response. Even if he didn’t want to celebrate it, she was glad she and her brother would have some more time here. They could always leave later if things with Ben didn’t…Cara stopped that line of thought and waited on the man she loved, the man who loved her, to say something.

His eyes searched hers, and she tried to smile. In a startling rush, Ben rolled over her, pinning her down and staring at her as if he was afraid she was going to take it back.

“You’re staying?”

She nodded weakly, too overwhelmed by his physical proximity and her own impetuous actions to say anything coherent. He gave her one light kiss and returned to staring at her.

“Why?”

“I don’t want to go anywhere. Mat wants to stay.”

“Simple enough.” Instead of kissing her as she’d anticipated, he stroked one fingertip down her cheek. “Whatever you need, I’ll do.”

“I know.” He shifted his position and nestled himself between her legs, his thighs brushing against hers, little hairs tickling against her skin. Now, she had to find out what else he knew.

“Ben, did you hear what Soren said to me at the end?”

He nodded and kissed her neck.

“About how we aren’t Ignar’s?”

She felt his head move in another nod as he brushed his lips along her shoulder.

“About how Mat and I are actually—oh it feels strange to say it—the lost La Torre heirs? And we might have sisters somewhere out there in the millions of square light years of the galaxy?”

He
mm-hmmed
against the skin of her breast, and she involuntarily shivered and rocked her hips to his.

“Does that change the way you feel about…” What he did to her nipple now made her throw her head back and writhe against the mattress.

“I love
you
, Cara Belasco, the person you’ve always been. Since I’m never going to meet your parents, it doesn’t really matter to me who they were. We can find your sisters.”

She let out a pent up sigh, either of relief or building arousal. It was hard to say, but both were excellent ways to feel. Trust Ben to confidently state her lost relatives would be found and move on to more pressing matters. “Thank you. I love you too. Oh goodness, what are you doing now?”

“Trying to seduce you before your brother arrives. We missed a lot of time last night.” He’d been running his thumbs across her sorely tight nipples and bolts of excitement ran through her.

“I know.” Cara recalled how frightened she’d been, how panicked at the thought they had been found out. “Ben, I want to stay, but if someone comes here after Mat and I, we’ll have to go.”

That had suddenly become her biggest fear. Now that she had decided to stay, all she could think was that they’d soon be forced to flee by another accuser. She’d be leaving Ben, and it ached even more now than it had before.

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll watch out for you.” Ben stopped touching her and caught her gaze with his own. “If you have to leave, I’ll go with you.”

Another wave of relief and gratitude rushed over her, and she wriggled against him and caught his mouth with hers. She had no idea what the future held, but she was secure with the knowledge that Bendix Zashi would discover it with her.

* * * *

Ben had returned to his rooms while Cara told Mat what had happened to Soren. It had given him the opportunity to put on fresh clothing, deal with some immediate messages from the station, and stare aimlessly at his piano, wondering when he’d ever get to play it for Cara.

His datpad buzzed with Cara’s signal, and he took a breath. She wanted him to come over and answer any questions Mat might have about his side of last night’s situation. He left his suite and stood at the Belasco’s door after signaling his arrival. Cara’s face appeared on the display, and she frowned at him.

“Why are you waiting out there?”

“Because it’s polite.”

She huffed out a sigh, but her quirked lips made her aggrieved tone unbelievable. “It’s also inefficient. You know the door code, start using it.”

Ben bit back the smile he felt growing inside. It had to have been stressful for her to discuss the death of their old companion with her brother, but all he could think was she wanted him to come and go as he pleased.

When the door didn’t open, he narrowed his eyes at her, and she smiled. “Unless you don’t remember the door code.”

With a shake of his head he keyed it in and entered the suite. Cara rushed up to him and gave him a quick soft kiss and then turned and headed back toward the living area.

Ben entered to find Mat sitting on the sofa, his eyes red and shoulders slumped. Ben edged closer and took a seat on the edge of a chair cushion. The boy glanced over and wrapped his arms around his belly.

“Mat, I’m really sorry about Soren.” Ben bit back his urge to offer more words of comfort since they would surely sound false coming from the man who’d been indirectly responsible for his death.

Mat sniffed and nodded his head once. Ben glanced at Cara who’d taken a seat next to her brother. She tilted her chin down, so he guessed he was proceeding correctly.

“Do you have any questions for me?”

“Yes. Why was that man so angry at Cara and me?”

Another glance at Cara and she gave him a nod. “His name was Myltin Tarl, and he was very curious about the people who lived here. He started to ask questions about you three and made some assumptions. I think Soren was following Cara last night, and when he saw Citizen Tarl take some images of Cara, he attacked to protect her.”

Mat swallowed. “That’s right. We never have digimas done, do we, Cara?”

His sister shook her head and rubbed her hand on his back. She sent him a worried look, her mouth downturned. She was probably thinking about what they’d discussed earlier.

She hadn’t wanted to tell him about Soren’s claim of their true parentage. Ben felt the boy deserved to know, but Cara decided she’d wait to tell him when he was older and better able to come to terms with their changed heritage. They both agreed there was nothing to be gained by making any sort of suspicious requests for additional information about the La Torre monarchy for a measureable time. Myltin’s attempts to access files might have alerted sinister forces, and the more time that elapsed, the safer they’d be. Searching for her sisters would have to commence with finding whatever encrypted file might exist in their secret account.

Cara had wanted to tell her brother about their relationship, but Ben had counseled some patience in that regard too. The boy had to adjust to the loss of a man he’d known and depended on his whole life, and it was hardly time to introduce someone new into it. Cara had frowned with displeasure, but Ben looked forward to some more sneaking around from terrace to terrace.

“Any other questions for me?”

Mat straightened his shoulders and stared him square in the eye. “Yes. Are you moving in here or are we going to live with you?”

Cara burst out an inarticulate puff of shocked air, and Ben blinked.

“Mat, what are you talking about?”

“I know you two are doing grown-up stuff at night. And you have these softie eyes at each other all the time. I like my room here, but as long as I got a big display, I wouldn’t mind moving to your place. Ben, will you show me how you climb from one terrace to another?”

The End

Publisher’s Note

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Lynn Rae makes her home in land-locked central Ohio after time spent in the former Great Black Swamp, beside the Ohio River, and along the Miami and Erie Canal. With professional experience in fields ranging from contract archaeology to librarianship along with making donuts and teaching museum studies, Lynn enjoys incorporating her quirky sense of humor and real-life adventures into her writing (except the naughty bits). She writes sci-fi, contemporary, and historical romances. You can find her posting frequently on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/lynnraewrites or at her webpage http://www.lynnraewrites.com/