If Ever I Fall (10 page)

“I didn’t know, I hoped.” Leaning down I take the chance and kiss the top of her head. I don’t miss her little sigh and I can’t help but think that she’s hiding more from me than I know.

“Let’s try this out.” Sean passes out the music and we all take our places. Laney looks nervous as she sits on the small stool in front of the piano.

“Don’t worry. We will work it all out.” I lean in whispering in her ear before grabbing my guitar and strumming a few chords.

“Ready? Let’s try it from the beginning. Jessie count us down.” I focus on the music in front of me as Jessie hits the drums.

When the music starts and Laney doesn’t I glance over at her. She looks sick, like she may throw up. Her eyes are full of tears but I can see there is something more wrong.

“Hold up.” I yell as the music stops. No one bats an eye but I see her, that look. Before I can say anything, Laney jumps up and runs.

“Laney!” I yell as I set my guitar down before I run after her. She is gone out of the studio so damn fast that I’m not sure how far she’s gotten.

Shoving the front door open I see her a little ways down bent over with her hands on her knees. I jog down to her but she turns away.

“Laney!” When she sees me she tries to walk away again but I am not letting that happen again.

Grabbing her arm, I spin her to face me, tears leaking down her cheeks.

“What happened?” Laney cries as she shakes her head. My heart can’t handle these tears, she’s killing me!

“I can’t do it, I’m sorry.” She pulls her arm away from me again but I just grip the other one pulling her against me.

Her head drops into my chest as her tears seep through my shirt wetting my chest. I grip the back of her head in my hand to hold her in place while she gets it all out. She seems to really need this.

“You don’t have to do anything.” I drop my head and bury my face in the top of her hair as she continues to sob. I hate that something is hurting her the way it is right now.

Laney pulls her head back and looks up at me with such a hurt expression that it rips at me.

“I can’t read music Gavin. I never learned how, I just… I just played.”  That’s what has her so worked up? As hard as that is to believe that is a minor problem.

“Laney, sweetheart, that is nothing. I can teach you how to read music. That isn’t something you should run from or cry over. You have an amazing talent.” Grabbing her face in my hands I wipe the tears with my thumbs.

“You would help me?” Was that even a question?

“Of course I will.” Planting a soft kiss on her forehead I pull her back into me.

“You have no idea how special you are.”

                                   
 
Laney

“I want to go home Gavin.” I smile up at Gavin who just smiles back.

“Are you leaving?” Sean smiles over at the two of us before Gavin moves to grab his bags.

“Yep. Going home man. I’ll call you later.” Gavin throws his bags over his shoulder before walking back towards me.

“I’m sorry Sean.” Sean waves his hand at me dismissing me.

“Don’t worry about it. We’ll talk later.” Nodding my head, Gavin jogs back over to me grabbing my hand.

“Let’s go home.” He drags me out of the studio overly excited to go home it seems.

“You hungry?” I look up at him with a huge smile, my Gavin’s back. The one I’ve missed for the last few weeks.

“Very!”

I follow Gavin over to his truck where he holds the door open for me. Climbing in a sense of peace engulfs me, a peace I’ve never felt before. I don’t understand why Gavin calms me but there is something about him that stills my wandering thoughts.

“Are you ok?” As Gavin climbs in, I glance over at him.

“Yeah, I’m just glad you’re coming home. It was really weird without you there.” Gavin gives me a small smile before starting the truck and pulling out.

We don’t speak as he pulls up at a restaurant. My mind is reeling with things to say to him but for whatever reason, I can’t get them to come out of my mouth.  Gavin does that to me. I want to talk to him but I’m afraid of opening up to him.

I climb out of the truck and follow Gavin inside to a corner booth. I’m surprised at his actions as I slide in; he waits and slides in next to me.

We look at the menu for a few minutes before we order. When the waitress walks off Gavin shifts so he’s looking at me.

“Why didn’t you tell me that you couldn’t read the music? Better yet, how the hell did you learn so much without knowing it?” His eyes are full of interest and it intrigues me.

“I don’t know. It all just came to me. I would listen to music on the radio, especially Christmas music. I would listen to it, close my eyes and envision it. I would sit in front of the piano and just let it flow.” Gavin’s eyes light up. I love seeing his eyes look like that.

“Why are you staring at me like that?” Gavin shakes his head as his eyes burn into me.

“You amaze me Laney. I have never met anyone like you.” The waitress drops off our food breaking our moment. I don’t know if I’m happy about it or not, but it was getting intense.

“What are you doing for Thanksgiving?” I take a bite of my chicken before looking over at him.

“I don’t know. Steph said I could hang out with them but I might stay home. There’s a musical that weekend that I want to see.” I shrug as I chew my food. I don’t do family time or gatherings seeing how I don’t have any family anymore.

“Go with me to my mom’s.” Gavin takes me by surprise. I can’t go with him to his moms! That is completely crazy.

“I don’t think so. I appreciate the offer though.” Gavin nods but he doesn’t say anything else. I can see that he’s upset but I can’t go to his families gathering.

                                
 
Gavin

I’ve been happy as hell being back at home with Laney. She seems so much more comfortable when I’m around. She’s back to her old goofy self that I lost for a while.

“Movie night!” I scream down the hallway as I turn the microwave on. Laney and I have been hanging out around the house and I’ve been teaching her how to read music. It didn’t surprise me that it came so easily to her either. She practically picked it up in a day.

“I’m coming! I want to watch Christmas movies!” Laney screams as she rushes down the hallway in her fuzzy pajama pants with matching fuzzy slippers. I can’t stop the laughter.

“What are you laughing at?” She stands there with her hands on her hips watching me for a reaction.

“What in the hell are on your feet?” The laughter keeps flowing out of me as she stalks closer to me.

“These are called slippers. You don’t like them?” Laney lifts her foot up shaking it around. How can I stop laughing when the little fuzzy shit is shaking around like that!

“They are furry, Laney. I don’t know what to even say about that shit.” Pointing at it I laugh harder.

“You are completely crazy! These are the best slippers. You’re jealous.” She pokes me in the chest as she walks around me to the freezer.

“I am. I’m jealous of those. I want to get me a pair. Oh! My Christmas present from you!” I love messing with this girl, she’s so playful.

“I will get you some purple ones with matching pants.” She walks around me and pops me on the nose with a spoon. I watch her shake her little ass as she makes her way towards the living room.

When the microwave turns off, I grab our popcorn and follow her out there. Dropping on the couch next to her, I prop my feet on the table.

I turn a movie on as we munch on popcorn and ice cream.

“Are you dipping that in the damn ice cream?” I snatch the popcorn bowl away from Laney when I see her dipping it in her chocolate ice cream.

With a mouth full she looks over at me.

“Hey! It’s good.” I think that’s what she said, I wouldn’t know her mouth is full and when she talks pieces spray out. I laugh harder than I ever have.

“That’s nasty!” Throwing some popcorn at her, she laughs. She picks some up and throws it back before I jump off the couch.

“Be nice, Laney! I’m bigger than you are.” Throwing a handful at her, she laughs and jumps up standing on the couch.

“We’ll see.”

“Get that fur off our couch!” Another handful flies her way. Laney laughs before jumping off the couch and hanging on my back. I spin her around causing her to laugh harder.

“Eat it! EAT IT!” She tries to shove popcorn in my mouth but I hold it shut. I spin her around a few more times before she slides off and falls to the floor laughing.

“You dropped me!” She giggles as her face turns red. I can’t stop staring at her, she’s magnificent.

I extend my hand to help her up, which she takes. I pull her up and her giggles keep coming.

My eyes lock with hers and I want so much to kiss those lips of hers again but I hold back. Her hands are on my chest and burning through me. I just want to taste her, to hold her.

Before I make a move Laney pushes up on her toes and brushes her lips across mine. I’m still as a fucking statue letting her do what she wants to me.

My body hums and I feel like a school boy again.

“What are you doing?” When she pulls back her eyes are closed but her lips are still partially parted. My breathing is rapid and my mind is a fiery mess.

“I want to try something.” Her lips are back on mine; just barely touching but sending jolts of electricity through me. I want to reach out and grab her, hold her to me but I know I can’t.

“I want to know if what I feel is real.” A tear slides down her cheek and I can’t stop myself now, I reach up and wipe it away before she opens her eyes.

“It’s real Laney. I feel it too.”

“I don’t know if I can let myself go again.” I can sense the fear inside of her. She’s so lost and broken. Whoever hurt her hurt her bad.

“Try, Laney. Try for me.”

                              
 
Laney

We lay curled together on the couch after the movies over. It’s nice to be in his arms like this.

“Have you changed your mind about Thanksgiving? It is tomorrow you know.” Gavin’s groggy voice is so damn sexy I can’t handle it.

“I don’t know. I’m not much of the family person. I never had that.” His arms tighten around me and my heart picks up a beat.

“You should have it. You should have so much more.” His lips brush against my forehead before he pulls me in tighter.