Quitting (previously published as Mastering the Art of Quitting) (31 page)

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In
dex

Above-average effect,
20–21
,
65–66
,
67

Abramson, Lyn Y.,
71

Abstract goals,
46
.
See also
Goals

Abstract thinking,
199–200

Achievement

and failure, fear of,
92–93

See also
Achievement goals

Achievement goals,
46
,
153

and attachment theory,
88–89

See also
Goals

Action-oriented coping,
97–104

and regret,
183–184

Actional stage, of goal pursuit,
202

Adaptation,
207

Adolescent construction competencies, and preschool delay behavior,
114–115

Affective disengagement,
117

and emotions, management and regulation of,
58–61

Affective forecasting,
66

Ainsworth, Mary,
86–87

Alloy, Lauren B.,
71

Ambivalent attachment,
87
,
89–91
.
See also
Attachment theory

Anxious attachment,
89–91
.
See also
Attachment theory

Approach-avoidance theory,
85–92
,
97

Approach goals,
46–48
,
91
,
194

and goal framing,
94

and goal mapping,
158

See also
Goals

Artful quitting,
1
,
37
,
76–78
,
83–85

and coping, action-vs. state-oriented,
97–104

definition of,
11

and emotions, management and regulation of,
11

and flexibility,
33–34

and life stage,
82–83

and personality systems interaction theory,
97

strategies,
190–192

talent for,
81–83
,
85–92

talent for, characteristics of,
107

and thought and emotion, regulation of,
90
,
104
(
see also
Emotions, management and regulation of
)

and timing,
82
,
83

See also
Goal disengagement
;
Quitting

Attachment theory,
86–92

and stress,
87
,
88

and visual cliff,
87–88

See also
Insecure attachment
;
Secure attachment

Attention to detail,
127–131

and change blindness,
129–130

and door-switch experiment,
129–130

and intentional blindness,
128–129
,
130

and invisible gorilla experiment,
127–129
,
130

and single-mindedness,
130

Automaticity,
145–147

and brain scans,
29

and goal pursuit,
27–30

and goals,
145

and goals, achievement of,
205

and implementation intention,
206

and intrusive thoughts,
146–147

and persistence,
27–30

and priming,
28–30

and white bears,
29–30

See also
the Brain

Autotelic experience,
161–162

Availability heuristic,
15–17

Aversive emotion,
183

Avoidance

cost of,
94–97

strategies,
94–96

See also
Approach-avoidance theory

Avoidance goals,
46–48
,
91
,
92
,
194

and goal framing,
94

and goal mapping,
158

and parent-child relationship, and failure, fear of,
93

and well-being,
95
,
96

See also
Approach-avoidance theory
;
Goals

Avoidant attachment,
87
,
89–90
.
See also
Approach-avoidance theory
;
Attachment theory

Awareness, conscious,
174

 

“Bad Is Stronger than Good” (Baumeister),
173

Bargh, John A.,
28
,
47
,
205

Barrett, Lisa Feldman,
111–112

Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother
(Chua),
212

Baumeister, Roy,
55–56
,
57–58
,
60
,
167
,
173

Behavioral activity,
207

Behavioral disengagement,
61–64

Behavioral intelligence,
167

Bias blind spot,
65

Biases

blind spot,
65–66

impact bias,
69–70

optimistic,
3
,
21
,
70–71

Big bang (“enough is enough” moment),
41–42
.
See also
Quitting, unsuccessful styles of

Blame,
180

“The Blind Spot” (Pronin, Lin, and Ross),
65

Blocked path,
199

the Brain,
57
,
60
,
108
,
188

and brain scans,
29

and gambling, and near win,
14

and mental contrasting,
167–168

and persistence,
12–14

See also
Automaticity

Bridges, William,
144

 

Carver, Charles S.,
193
,
199

Causality, and single-mindedness,
137

Chabris, Christopher F.,
127–128
,
129–130

Change blindness,
129–130

Chartrand, Tanya L.,
28
,
148–149

Cheating,
132
,
134

Children

and emotional regulation, development of,
108–109

and impulsivity vs. self-control experiment,
113–115

See also
Parent-child relationship

Chua, Amy,
212

Church, Marcy A.,
94

Clinical depression,
59–60
,
71

Clutch player,
99

Cognition,
12

Cognitive activity,
207

Cognitive disengagement,
53–58
,
117

and ego depletion,
55–57

and intrusive thoughts,
53–55
,
57–58

and white bears,
53–54

and Zeigarnik effect,
57–58

Coherence, search for,
194–196
.
See also
Flow

Comfort patterns,
176–177
.
See also
Behavior patterns

Comfort zone,
30–31

and attachment theory,
86

Commitment, escalation of.
See
Escalation of commitment

Competition,
28–29

Concrete goals,
46
.
See also
Goals

Conflicting goals,
48–51
,
131

and extrinsic or intrinsic goals,
157

and goal mapping,
156–158

and goal setting,
137–140

and happiness and stress,
156

and health,
49–51

and stress,
156

without goal disengagement, harmful effects of,
49–51

See also
Goals

Congruence, and goal mapping,
156–158

Connolly, Terry,
183

Conscious awareness,
174

Conscious goal setting,
124
.
See also
Goal setting
;
Goals

Conscious goals,
145
,
147

and implementation intention,
206

See also
Goals

Conscious self-awareness, and mystery moods,
149–150

Continental Illinois Bank,
133

Coping, action-vs. state-oriented,
97–104

and regret,
183–184

and stress,
99
,
102

Counterfactual thinking,
179
,
186
,
187–188

and downward counterfactual thinking,
187

and regret,
187
,
188

and upward counterfactual thinking,
187

Csikszentmihalyi, Mihaly,
160
,
161–162
,
195–196

 

Deci, Edward L.,
45
,
46

Decision justification theory,
183

Decision making

and conscious goals,
147

and ego depletion,
55–56

and emotional intelligence,
110–112

Deliberative mind-set,
202–203
,
205

Delusional optimism,
21
.
See also
Optimism

Depression,
59–60

and positive thinking,
71

Depressive realism,
71
.
See also
Realism

Diefendorff, James M.,
98

Digital communications,
41

Disappearing act,
41
.
See also
Quitting, unsuccessful styles of

Disengagement,
37
.
See also
Goal disengagement

Disidentification process,
144

Disorganized attachment,
87

Distractor,
54

“Don't Put All Your Eggs in One Cognitive Basket” (Linville),
197

Downward counterfactual thinking,
187

Dows, Keith,
183–184

Drach-Zahavy, Anat,
132–133

Dreaming,
73–74

Dwelling,
74–75
,
164–165
,
166–167
.
See also
Mental contrasting

 

Ego,
55

Ego depletion,
60

and cognitive disengagement,
55–57

and decision making,
55–56

and emotions, suppression of,
56

and self-control,
55–56

Eliot, T. S.,
75

Elliot, Andrew J.,
47
,
48
,
85
,
86
,
88
,
92–93
,
94

Emmons, Robert A.,
49–50
,
194

Emotional dishonesty,
39

Emotional intelligence,
107–113

and ability to use emotions to inform thought and action,
110

branches of,
109–113

and decision-making process,
110–112

definition of,
107–108

and emotional knowledge,
108
,
111

and emotional regulation, and intellectual growth,
112–113

and emotions, management and regulation of,
108

and metacognition,
113

and positive and negative emotions, ability to recognize,
109–110

Emotional knowledge,
108
,
111

Emotions

definition of,
148

and emotional dishonesty,
39

and gender,
119–120

to inform thought and action,
110

vs. moods,
148

negative, and coping, action-vs. state-oriented,
97–102
,
103
,
104

positive and negative,
108–109

positive and negative, ability to recognize,
109–110

suppression of, and ego depletion,
56

Emotions, management and regulation of,
57
,
107

and affective disengagement,
58–65

and artful quitting,
11

and attachment theory,
87

and children,
108–109

and emotional intelligence,
108

and intellectual growth,
112–113

and negative emotions,
97–102
,
103
,
104

See also
Self-regulation

Epstude, Kai,
187

Erez, Miriam,
132–133

Escalation of commitment,
19–22
,
26

and above-average effect,
20–21

and loss aversion,
24–25

Events, bad vs. good, impact of,
173

Exotelic experience,
161–162

Expectation,
71–76

and dreaming,
73–74

and dwelling,
74–75

and fantasy,
73

and indulging,
74–75

and lottery winners,
71–72

and mental contrasting,
74–76

and pipe dream,
72–73
,
75

and reverse contrasting,
74

See also
Happiness, predicting future

External cues,
102–103

Extrinsic goals,
194
,
213

and conflicting goals,
157

definition of,
45–46

and flow,
161–162

and goal mapping,
153–156

and happiness,
154–155

See also
Goals
;
Intrinsic goals