Real Vampires Hate Their Thighs (15 page)

Richard moved closer and sniffed each of them. “Nothing unusual, but vamps don’t ingest foreign substances at all. I certainly wouldn’t take either of them again.”

“I’m going to ask Ian if there’s a different supplement I can take.” I pointed to the one I’d just finished. “I couldn’t keep that one down.”

“Then it can’t have helped you,
cara
.” Flo patted my shoulder. “Do we fly out there?”

“No, Ian’s sending a limo.” I looked at my watch. “We should go down now. I’d better put on Valdez’s leash.”

“Gee, can’t wait.”
Valdez sat patiently while I clipped it on his collar.

“Is that what you’re going to wear, Glory? You know the paparazzi will be out front waiting to take your picture. You have something cuter, no? This is too plain.” Flo looked me over critically as she followed me into the bedroom where I was going to put on my shoes.

“I’m trying to wear clothes that weigh the same as the first night. For comparison.” I looked in my closet. I did have some different jeans that would work. And a purple V-neck sweater that probably compared to a T-shirt. “All right. I’ll change, but not into leather. That stuff probably weighs a ton.”

“True, but is cute, no?”

“On you? You bet. When I’m a size six, I’ll get some pants like that. Only red. I love red leather.” I headed into the bathroom to slip into the clothes and to add a bit more blush. Couldn’t use the mirror, no reflection. But I
felt
pale. All that throwing up. And I wasn’t sure I wasn’t going to do it again. I took a few shallow breaths until the nausea passed, then came out to sit on the side of the bed to slip on my heels.

“Much better.” Flo sat next to me. “You’re not losing this weight to please Israel, are you?”

“No, of course not. He’s sweet about my size, even though the tabloids are positively gruesome to me. You know the headlines: ‘Baby on Board? Caine Sings the Blues.’”

“
Bastardos!
I hope they have wives with elephant butts.” Flo put her arm around me and squeezed.

“I’m losing the weight for me, Flo. Because I’ve always wanted to and couldn’t. You know?”

“I know. I’ve heard you talk about it. Like me and my height. I am so short, people don’t take me seriously. I am a, how you say, shrimp.” She laughed. “But we are women who can take care of ourselves, no?”

“Yes, we can. And I’m going to do this. Even if I have to suffer a little bit.” I bit back a moan when my stomach cramped. “Thanks for coming with me. It means a lot.”

“No problem. Now, let’s head out. I want to see this Malibu. Is the Pacific Ocean beautiful?”

“Very. Especially if you like the water.” I walked behind her into the living room and grabbed my purse. “Ian’s home is gorgeous. He has a fantastic view from every window. That’s as close as I want to get to any ocean.”

“The Pacific is beautiful.” Richard handed Flo her tiny purse. “I’m surprised you’ve never seen it before, darling.”

“So am I. Guess I’m just an East Coast, Mediterranean type of woman, eh, Ricardo?” She kissed his cheek as he opened the door into the hall. “Do we have a plan, gentlemen?” She looked at Valdez, who trotted in front of me.

“Sure. We watch Ian like a hawk. One wrong move from the MacDonald and we take him apart. That’s my plan.”
Valdez looked back at me when I grabbed his tail.
“Ouch?”

“Cool it, tough guy. I’ll decide what a wrong move is. In your state of mind, Ian could scratch his chin and you’d take it as an offensive move.”

Valdez chuckled and looked at Richard.
“It is. That’s the old Prague maneuver. Am I right, Rich?”

“Sure, seen it done a thousand times. Let it go and you’re staring at the business end of a stake before you know it.”

I punched the elevator call button. “Right. Keep amusing yourselves. But this is my deal. Screw it up and I’ll never forgive you. Either of you. Florence, keep your man in line.”

Flo pressed herself against Richard. “Ricardo, stay calm, let Glory enjoy Ian’s magic. When she is a size six, you can tear him apart.
Sì
, Glory?” She grinned at me.

“Well, I wouldn’t put it like that.” The elevator arrived and Ray’s former bedmate happened to be inside. Well, if that wasn’t a kick in my size-twelve pants. I smiled and nodded and sent Flo a mental message. It had her narrowing her eyes and sending her own message that had the mortal female sweating and getting off at the first opportunity.

“Puttana!”
Flo hissed after her when we were alone in the elevator again.

“What?” Richard had been humming under his breath, obviously not included in our mental messaging. “You know, I’ve heard this name MacDonald before but can’t place it. I’ll have to ask Blade.”

“Uh, don’t do that. He’s got a thing about the MacDonalds. Ever since they stole some of his cattle about five hundred years ago. Ancient history, and I want to enjoy this trip.” I laughed while my stomach took a serious dive and I jabbed at the button for the lobby. “Trust me. Ian’s not interested in cattle. So don’t kill him, okay?”

“No promises. That scratching-the-chin thing is no joke. Especially if he’s got his own security crew.” Richard looked down at Valdez. “We need a signal. I say it’s a foot jiggle. Left foot. Left front for you, V. That clear?”

“Got it. Then we strike.”
Valdez looked up at me.
“And don’t get in our way if we do, Glory. It will be life or death or we wouldn’t start the war.”

I swallowed as the elevator doors opened on the lobby. My stomach was rolling again and I had the feeling that everything was spiraling out of control. A camera flashed as we neared the waiting stretch limo and I heard a shouted question.

“Hey, Glory, when’s the baby due?”

I kept my head down, but Valdez growled and apparently Flo shot the finger at the guy because there were more flashes and I could hear her shouting what sounded like dire threats in Italian. I grabbed Richard’s arm so he wouldn’t start something right there in front of the hotel. Yep, things were clearly going to hell in a handbasket. But I was going to lose this weight or die trying.

“
You
brought your friends with you, Glory.” Ian smiled and bowed over Flo’s hand. “But not Caine.”

“Ray’s really tied up with the Grammy promotional stuff, Ian.” I smiled and swallowed the urge to heave all over Ian’s leather loafers. “And would you believe Florence has never seen the Pacific Ocean? I knew you wouldn’t mind if they rode out here with us. You remember Richard Mainwaring, Florence’s husband. You met at the club.”

The men nodded, obviously taking each other’s measure again away from the excitement and noise of the vampire club. I shivered from the chill in the air. Or was it because I felt clammy and about to faint? I grabbed hold of Valdez’s fur to steady myself.

“Glory? What the hell?”
Valdez bumped me over to the leather couch and I fell onto it.
“MacDonald,
do
something. I think she’s about to pass out.”

I heard them all talking. Flo babbling in excited Italian, Richard’s calm voice in the same language and Ian’s cool hands on my face as he lifted my lids and looked into my eyes.

“Glory, how do you feel?”

“Like shit.” I tried to sit up, but couldn’t manage it. “That stuff you gave me to drink when I woke up”—I shuddered—“made me sick.” I closed my eyes but the world kept spinning.

“Trina! Get in here!” Ian or somebody arranged me so I was lying back on the cool leather. Then I smelled Trina’s warm wrist at my lips. My fangs came into play and that was all she wrote. I drank thirstily, as if I hadn’t had a feeding in weeks. Finally, someone pulled her off me, or I’m pretty sure I would have drained her dry.

“Gee, that was intense.” Trina sounded gleeful. “Master, did you see how I endured? I must have pleased you.”

“Yes, now leave us. I’ll reward you later.” Ian actually sounded concerned, but not about Trina. She was merely a donor. He sat beside me again, rubbing my hands. “Glory, how do you feel now? Open your eyes.”

I didn’t want to. Not yet. I was savoring the rush again. Trina must have just completed a run and her adrenaline pulsed through me. I wanted to fly around the room or maybe jump somebody’s bones. I inhaled Ian’s scent and thought about what a good-looking man he was. And a friggin’ genius. Hmm. If I didn’t have an audience, I could open my legs and . . . Was I nuts? I finally sat up, pushing my hair out of my eyes.

“Glory! How do you feel?” Flo shoved Ian off the couch and sat beside me. “
Mio Dio
, you scared me.”

“I feel great, Flo, seriously. Did you see her? Trina? She’s the runner I told you about. I am
so
pumped.” I grinned and slipped past Flo so I could jump up and stretch. Richard and Valdez watched me, waiting for me to collapse again.

“Hey, relax, guys. I’m fine. Just like last night, the feeding was fantastic.” I turned to Ian. “But, sorry, those supplements have got to go. I can’t handle them. Especially the one I drink when I wake up. Couldn’t keep it down. It made me puke my guts up.”

Ian frowned. “That’s strange.” He picked up a bottle from the coffee table. “What about the first one you drank? Before you slept?”

“Gave me hideous nightmares.” I shook my head. “Well, some of them were hideous. Parts were sexy.” I winked at Flo. “To dream at all was so completely bizarre, but cool now that I think about it.”

“Of course. Vampires don’t dream. Not during the death sleep.” Ian kept frowning. “Glory, you’re having a very unusual reaction to my supplements. This simply doesn’t happen.”

Richard stepped in. “Oh, come on, MacDonald. I don’t believe that for a minute. Did you hear what she said? Gloriana’s reaction sounds like she was poisoned.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. I’ve treated dozens of vampires with these formulas. None of them have complained of these symptoms.” Ian shook his head. “And I wouldn’t experiment on Glory, not after Mr. Caine paid for the deluxe package. She’s taking what all my top-drawer clients take when they want to lose weight. My reputation depends on getting excellent results.”

“Then why don’t you get some of those other special clients out here and let us interview them? I want to talk to vampires who have been through this. Check out your reputation.” Richard glanced at me. “Did you bother to do that, Gloriana?”

“Well, no. But Ray and I saw a video. A success story.” I gestured at the TV screen. “You should see the results Ian gets. And I didn’t want to wait. I want to look good for the red carpet.” I ignored Valdez’s muttering. Nice to know he liked me the way I was, but I’d started this and I wanted to finish it.

“You know how vampires are. It’s not like we publish a directory, Mainwaring. We fly under the radar. Change location, name, habits, constantly. As far as I know, and I told Glory this, none of the vampires have stayed close enough for her to meet them. But I could give you a few phone numbers that
might
still be good.” Ian smiled, obviously convinced Richard would drop this if he was charming enough. I knew better.

“And what would that prove?” Flo stayed close to my side. “Anyone can get on a phone and pretend to be a satisfied client. Am I right,
amante
?”

“Right, Florence.” Richard looked approvingly at his wife. “Give me a copy of some of these videos. And I want names and addresses of your ‘successes.’ I’ll check them out personally.”

“Of course. Give me a few days—” Ian was suddenly jerked up by his custom-made Egyptian cotton shirt.

“
Now
, MacDonald. Or we take Gloriana out of here and report you to the vampire council of Los Angeles. You’re obviously running a scam here. Unless you can prove us wrong.” Richard released Ian but it was clear the war had started.

“Richard, Ian. I’m okay now. Seriously. I just want to know what I can use besides this particular wake-up drink. I can deal with the nightmares if I have to.” I pushed between the two men. Valdez practically knocked me over, staying glued to my left hip.

“Richard, I appreciate what you’re trying to do, but this is important to me. Back off.” I sent Flo a mental message and she grabbed her husband’s arm.

“Ricardo, you can’t ‘take’ Glory anywhere.” Flo looked me over. “But I don’t like this sickness either, girlfriend. You’re pale, not flushed like you should be after feeding. At least let Ricardo investigate.”

“Sure, knock yourself out. But I’m going ahead with this.” I sat on the couch again, still a little woozy, though I wasn’t about to admit it. “What else have you got, Ian?”

“Are you sure you feel all right now, Glory?” Ian decided to ignore Richard for the moment and studied me.

“Yes, fine. Stomach’s completely settled.” I jumped up again and plastered on a smile. So what if the room tilted?

“Then come weigh in.” He gestured toward his office. “I’ve got something else you can try. And I’ll get copies of those records you want, Mainwaring.”