First Chances (14 page)

I had spent all this time trying to bring back a girl I didn’t want to lose without stopping to think that maybe there was nothing wrong with the girl Hadie was now. Maybe Hadie was fine being whoever she wanted to be.

I loved her, anyway.

Chapter Twenty-One

Hadie

I was a teenage whore.

That was what I felt like when I rolled over and found Eddie Cavallari In my bed.

I was as good as one. I’d gone and done the one thing I’d told myself I would wait a long time to do again. The one thing I had refused to do with Three on so many occasions had felt so right with Eddie.

Sex. Amazing sex with an amazing guy. Lost in moments I didn’t want to resurface from. Lost in Eddie. Lost in the way he touched me; the way his mouth teased my skin; the way a torrent of feelings rose up in my chest.

I hadn’t wanted another guy to touch me in the ways that Lincoln had. I had wanted the memory of being with Lincoln to stay with me for as long as possible.

Why did Eddie have to make it so easy to fall for him? He didn’t realize it, but this was part of the reason why I’d been so determined to put distance between us. Because I knew the very second I opened up to him, I would fall helplessly in love with him.

A part of me had always known that Eddie would be my happily ever after, but that part of me had also resisted because I didn’t think I deserved a happy ending if Lincoln didn’t get to have one either.

My eyes wandered over Eddie’s face as he slept. His expression was peaceful, untroubled; the opposite of what it had been when he’d spilled his darkest secret to me last night. And he didn’t have to. God knew how terribly I’d treated him.

At the same time, I was selfish; I wanted to be around his goodness and bask in it. He was the only one who made me feel like I could be a better person than the one I was now.

Eddie let out a soft groan, and his lids fluttered open. His green-brown eyes peered at me in confusion. He quickly sat up in an upright position, this time releasing an even louder groan.

“Shit. What time did we go to bed last night?”

I thought back to the hours we had spent lying in my bed, whispering to each other in the darkness; running our hands over each other’s bodies; eager mouths kissing uninhibited. “A long time,” I responded, sitting up beside him and putting a hand to my throbbing head. “Why did we do that?”

Eddie turned his head slightly so we were making eye contact. “I don’t know, Hadie. Why did we?”

From the look in his eyes, we both knew we were asking a question that we already knew the answer to.

“Uh, um.” Suddenly feeling shy, I broke away from his gaze and clumsily tried to find my clothes on the floor.

I felt Eddie’s hand on my elbow. “Was it a mistake?”

The power of his words made me look back at him. There was something in his face that relayed everything he felt for me, and I easily shook my head at him. “No, it wasn’t.” I paused. “But there is so much wrong with me, Eddie.” My voice broke, and I quickly swallowed down the lump in my throat.

“I don’t give a damn, Hadie.” He moved around on the bed until he was on the floor, kneeling in front of me. He grabbed my face with both hands, looking me right in the eyes. “I’ve been waiting for you for a long time. I’ve been waiting for you to open your eyes and see me. But I don’t want to wait anymore. I don’t want to waste any more time waiting.”

The lump in my throat refused to go away, and tears pricked at my eyes. “Someone like you can’t be real.”

“I am real, and I’m right here in front of you. You were never alone. I was always here. You just didn’t see me.”

His words broke my heart, reminding me how awful I’d been to him. I really wanted to lean forward and kiss him right on those soft lips of his, but I smelled terrible—like a gross combination of sex and sweat. He did not need to smell that.

“Thank you for not giving up on me,” I said, giving him a small smile instead.

He returned the smile and dropped his hands from my face. “Do you wanna grab something to eat?” he asked, reaching over the side of the bed for his clothes.

“Sure,” I agreed with a nod, “but first I need to sneak you out of my house before my parents realize you’re here. Let me see if the coast’s clear.”

“Alright,” he said as he began putting his clothes back on.

Last night, my parents had gotten home right around midnight. Eddie and I had been awake, and as soon as I’d heard their car pull into the driveway, I’d made Eddie hide in the closet. I’d pretended to sleep when my parents had opened the door to check in on me, so they had no idea Eddie had spent the night in my bed.

A flush of embarrassment hit me as I fumbled for my clothes and quickly put them on. I knew there was no point in being embarrassed since we’d had sex last night, but in the daylight I felt so vulnerable and naked—literally.

Once I was dressed, I walked over to my door and quietly opened it, peering outside like a burglar in my own home. In the air, I could smell the delicious scent of bacon frying. Damn. My parents were up-

My eyes grew wide as I stared at the piece of paper taped to the wall directly opposite my door.

Hadie,

When you and Eddie are up, we would love to have you both join us for breakfast.

Love, the parents who tried not to listen to you getting it on last night.

Fuck. All the fucks in the world.

My face was burning hot as I shut the door and turned to face Eddie who was watching me expectantly.

“We’re screwed. My parents know you’re here.”

Eddie ran a hand through his messy hair and shrugged. “Well, what do you wanna do? Should I say hi?”

“They want us to join them for breakfast,” I said with a resigned sigh.

“It’ll be fine,” he said with encouragement. “Your parents are cool.”

I groaned inwardly. My parents were not cool. My dad wanted to kill Three; who knew what he would do to Eddie who had spent the night in my room.

Reluctantly, I led the way out of my room and towards the kitchen, dreading what would await me there. My parents were weird and random, so who the hell knew what was about to happen.

The smell of bacon and eggs frying grew as we approached the entrance to the kitchen, and I glanced over at Eddie to see him give me an encouraging nod. Then without any warning, he pulled my hand into his just as we stepped into the kitchen.

His skin against mine sent shivers racing through my stomach, but at the same time comforted me. This boy definitely made me feel things that I had been denying for a while.

Chance and Halo immediately jumped up and ran to me, tails wagging. I reached down to pet them both, but my attention was on my parents—Mom was standing over the stove, while Dad sat at the kitchen table with a newspaper in his hands.

“Well, well, well,” Dad said, casually gazing up from his newspaper, “if it isn’t Eddie Cavallari, stealer of my daughter’s good name and virtue.”

“Dad!” I choked out as my face flamed. I shot Eddie an apologetic look. “I am so sorry about him!”

Luckily, Eddie didn’t seem unnerved by my dad’s weirdness. Instead, he was trying his hardest not to laugh as he bent down to play with Chance and Halo, appearing entirely at ease. Chance was licking Eddie’s hand, while Halo jumped up on him with too much enthusiasm.

I was totally working on the jumping thing with Halo—he was not allowed to jump, but Eddie didn’t seem to mind at all. He was grinning and talking to the dogs as they loved on him, something that made my heart melt a little.

“Would you like bacon and eggs, Eddie dear?” Mom asked as she breezed around the kitchen, completely in her comfort zone.

Eddie straightened up, nodding. “Sure, that sounds great, Mrs. Swinton.”

“Take a seat, Eddie,” Dad said, gesturing to the chair beside him. “We can do pancakes, too.”

“Oh, good idea, Peter,” Mom said, humming a little as she headed for the pantry. I could’ve sworn there was a bounce in her step as she walked.

What in the holy fuck? My parents were insane. I had just let a boy spend the night in my room and they were offering to make him pancakes? If this was Three, Dad would’ve run him out of the house with a broom.

“Oh, please don’t go to any trouble, Mrs. Swinton,” Eddie said, as he took the seat beside Dad. “Bacon and eggs are totally fine.”

“Really, Eddie?” she asked with a frown, pausing to study him. “Because it really is no trouble.”

“Really, Mrs. Swinton,” Eddie assured her.

“If you’re sure, dear,” Mom said, hurrying to fill up a plate of food for Eddie.

I noticed that she hadn’t bothered to ask me if I wanted pancakes. Deep down that fact made me light and happy that she liked Eddie so much.

“How was your night, Eddie?” Dad asked, his expression quite serious. “I mean, without going into any raunchy details, how was your night?”

Eddie chuckled as I took a seat beside him, absolutely mortified by my father. Could this get any worse?

“It was fine, Mr. Swinton,” Eddie said, just as Mom placed a plate of scrambled eggs and bacon down in front of him. “The support group was great as usual, and then afterwards Hadie and I hung out.”

“Interesting. I used to hang out quite a lot back in my day,” Dad said, looking at Eddie over his glasses. “And it’s Peter, Eddie. No need to get so formal.”

Peter?
Peter?
I was at a complete loss for words as I stared between Dad and Eddie. Dad’s face was practically glowing as he spoke to Eddie, as though Christmas had come early. I was pretty sure my parents were never that excited to see me.

“Can I get you something to drink, Eddie?” Mom asked, hovering over the table with bright eyes.

“Orange juice, if you have it, please.”

“Of course, dear,” she said sweetly.

“Uh, mom,” I said as she walked away to tend to Eddie’s needs. “Can I have bacon and eggs, too?”

“Oh, right, sure!” she said absently, pouring Eddie a glass of juice. “So, Eddie, how is your mother?”

“She’s good,” he said, and for a split second something passed over his face. He quickly pushed it away. “She’s busy working crazy, long shifts at the hospital.”

“I can imagine that must be hard for you,” Mom said, walking over with the juice and a plate of bacon and eggs for me. “You have a little sister, don’t you?”

Even though I was pretty sure my mom knew the answers to these questions, I think she was making conversation to show Eddie that she was interested in his life. In Statlen, everyone pretty much knew about everyone else’s business, and my mom wasn’t an exception, even though she wasn’t a gossip queen like some of the other women in this town.

“Yeah, Hailie,” he answered, pausing to chew on a piece of bacon. “It’s hard managing our time, but we’re making it work.”

“And your father is deployed, right?” Mom asked.

Eddie’s face darkened, and I immediately butted into the conversation. “Mom, I think you left the stove on.”

“Did I?” she asked, turning back to the stove to double check. “No, it’s off.”

Eddie shot me a grateful look and continued to eat his eggs. As Mom swiftly returned, I gave her a pointed look, and she winked at me before glancing over at Dad. “Peter, remember that thing we have to do?”

“Huh?” Dad asked, looking confused. “What thing?”

Mom widened her eyes and motioned her head in our direction. “You know, that thing for the clients?”

Dad’s gaze shot to Eddie and me. “Oh! That thing! Yes, uh, excuse us, we have some important business to take care of.”

Biggest face palm moment. My parents didn’t understand the meaning of subtlety. At least they were trying to give Eddie and me some alone time, so I couldn’t be too annoyed at them for their obviousness.

“Thank you so much for breakfast. I really appreciate it,” Eddie said, as my parents headed out of the kitchen.

“No problem, Eddie,” Dad said. “We hope to see you around more, okay?”

“Sure thing, Mr. Swinton,” Eddie said with a nod.

“Peter!” Dad corrected as he disappeared down the hall.

I shook my head in disbelief. “Well, I think it’s safe to say that my parents worship the ground you walk on.”

Eddie laughed as he turned his head back to look at me. My stomach did a giant backflip as I studied him. “I think they’re just being nice.”

“Trust me, they’re not nice like this to everyone,” I said, chewing on my eggs, thinking back on how unimpressed they were with Three. “They freaking love you. Even my dogs love you.”

I wasn’t sure what it was about Eddie, but I was pretty sure even my parents wanted me to be with him. If their over-the-top kindness wasn’t a clear sign then I wasn’t sure what was.

“And what about you?” he teased, studying me in a way which made me blush.

“Uh, um,” I spluttered. Feeling self-conscious, I stared down at my plate, awkwardly changing the subject. “I, um, what did you say to Kance in the office? I know you had something to do with her changing her mind about getting me into trouble.”

Eddie shrugged, pushing the food around on his plate. “I had dirt on her. I used it.”

Dirt? What kind of dirt could Eddie possibly have on the queen bee of the school? The more I learned about him, the more intriguing he became.