Finding Home (30 page)

My feet fly up the stairs as fast as they can. My sole mission is to give her what she wants. And now. “I want inside too, Sam. Badly.”

Throwing open the door, I quickly kick it closed and pin her against it. My mouth finds her lips and neck as I kiss and suck on her. My anxious fingers seek out her dress zipper while my mind imagines what’s waiting for me underneath. Yanking it down roughly, I could give a fuck if I rip the damn thing off. My sudden sense of urgency has me feeling frantic. She must notice, because she lowers her legs to the floor and pushes me off her.

Slowly and methodically, she slides her dress down to the floor. She’s not wearing a bra, so my eyes get to feast on the perfect roundness of her breasts. Her hard nipples are the perfect shade of pink—an invitation for me to visit. She’s completely naked except for her heels. I stop and stare at her beauty as she reveals all of herself to me. We stand there not speaking, trying to catch our breaths for just a moment.

Finally, the growl that has been forming deep in my belly makes its way out. The caveman in me—the one who hasn’t had sex in two years—rears its ugly head. “Keep the heels on.” Her head goes back as she laughs softly. The look she gives me makes me wonder if the tables have turned as she steps seductively toward me.

Without hesitation she removes my suit jacket, yanks at my bowtie, and places it around her neck. Starting with the top button, she carefully works her way down my shirt. My feet begin to shift from side to side—my patience is waning. My inner lion roars as I rip my shirt apart, sending the buttons flying off in various directions. Her mouth forms am ‘o’ as she looks at me with surprise. “I guess you didn’t like that shirt.”

“Fuck my shirt. I told you. I want in.” She only smiles at me before kissing and licking her way down my chest, stopping at my belt line. It’s been so long since I’ve been touched like this that I don’t know if I can take it much more.

“Sam ... I …”

She gently brushes against my straining cock to shut me up. “Shh. I got this. I got you.”

My belt is next, and she removes it with ease. As she pulls down my zipper I hold her hands in place to stop her. “No, I got this.”

My hands go to her ass as I lift her up off the floor. Her legs wraps around me as I pull her in close to me. Immediately she begins to grind her hips into my hard cock, and I can’t hide the satisfaction I get from the sigh she lets out. “Jesus, Sam. I’m so hard for you.” We kiss each other while I move her to the bed and lay her down gently. Seeing her lying naked in my bed fuels my desire for her. “Having you in my bed, wearing only those heels and tie, kills my self-control. I want to take it slow, but I don’t think that’s possible with how much I need to be inside you.”

“I don’t need it slow. I just need you.” She smiles shyly as a red hue spreads across her face.

This girl tears me up inside. I didn’t think I could ever do this again. I continue to look her over, my heart swelling inside for this girl and how she heals me. “You are everything,” I whisper to her.

She stares at me and doesn’t break eye contact. “You. Only you. Can move me.” I watch her touch her breasts in slow, circular motions. My breath hitches as her hands make their way down, tickling her belly. Her fingers delicately touch her clit. Her soft moans hypnotize me as she continues to rub herself before she stops to suck on her finger. “I’m so wet for you. Come and feel me. Touch me.”

Well, damn, if that’s not the best fucking invitation for me to get my shit together.

I quickly remove my pants while she watches. My inner alpha male pounds on my chest as she grins when my cock springs free. Then, out of nowhere, a sudden sense of panic creeps over me. My feet seem to be stuck to the floor, and I can only imagine the look on my face.

“What’s wrong? Did I do or say something? Ben, talk to me.” She gets up and reaches her hand out to me. I hold onto it as our fingers mold together.

“I’m sorry. I think I might be freaking out. I kind of realized that it’s been a really long time, and I’m afraid it’s going to be quick. I don’t want to disappoint you.”

Sam pulls me into her so that our naked bodies are touching, and my cock comes back to life. Our breaths hitch as she whispers in my ear, “You already made me come once tonight. I know you can do it again.” She lies back down and pulls me on top of her. Then her tongue licks my lips before nibbling on them.

Her legs wrap around me as she thrusts her hips upward. The warmth from her wetness touches the tip of my cock, and it’s all I can do not to plunge deep inside her. “Ah … fuck. Okay, Sam … shit.” I kiss her hard while my hand caresses her right thigh then moves inward to her core. My thumb circles her clit before I plunge one finger in, then two. Her hips gyrate on my hand as she fucks it. Our mutual pulses continue with unabashed fury. Her breath increases as her insides clamp down on my fingers. The vibrations of her orgasm prompt her to bite down on my neck. The sensation is a lethal combination of pleasure and pain. I almost blow my load watching the way her body explodes in pleasure.

Pushing myself up, I try to gain some control. I have to look her straight in the eyes and get out what I need to say. “Babe, look at me.” I watch as her eyes lazily open. I mentally pat myself on the back for a job well done, but I know I’m not near completion. “Just so you know, this is going to be hard and fast. It’s been a long time, but give me a few minutes, and we’ll go again.” The look of surprise and lust meet my gaze, and I know I’ve got her … all of her. And I know I can’t wait any longer. Moving onto my knees, I grab her hands and place them above her head and lock them with my grip. “Babe, let’s get one thing straight. I know I’ll want more of you. One time doesn’t seem like it will ever be enough. Brace yourself.”

“Brace yourself.” That’s all the warning he gives me before he slams his mouth into mine. The force sends shocks to my already throbbing core. My lady bits haven’t seen this much action in a long time. I knew he could kiss, but what he does with his tongue and lips on the rest of my body has most likely ruined me. There can never be anyone else.

He releases my hands to reach into the bedside table for a condom. I move to help him, but when I do he simply shakes his head no. “Leave your hands there, unless I tell you otherwise.” The whimper I let out makes him chuckle. His sudden arrogance prompts me to kick him in the ass with one of my locked legs. This only makes him laugh louder.

“You ass.” The smile on his face is contagious, and I can’t help but return it.

“You like this ass.” The laughter dies down as we both stare at each other with intent and longing. He lowers himself while hiking one of my legs up even higher. He places a soft kiss on my lips while rubbing his tip at my entrance. My hips involuntarily thrust upward, and then, as promised, he sinks deep inside me in one swift motion. The sound I make is one mixed with pain and pure bliss. He pauses and waits for me to adjust. “Are you okay?”

“I’m better than okay. Don’t stop.” I thrust my hips into him, imploring for him to continue.

He starts to plunge into me at a slow, teasing rate. He must sense my frustration because he begins to change his pace. Changing positions, he sits back on his knees and places my leg up over his shoulder. He hits me deep and hard as he increases his thrusts.

His pace is frantic and merciless. He slams into me with such strength that the ache turns pleasurable. It’s all I can do to just hang on for the ride.

I long to do something with my hands as they wildly grab at the pillow. “I need to touch you. Please … Ah …”

“That’s it, babe. God, you feel so good. So fucking tight and warm.”

“Ah … Let me touch you.”

“Are you going to come for me?” His breath is getting heavier, and I can feel his sweat drip onto my skin. He continues the unyielding assault on my body, and I can’t help but want more.

“Yes. I’m so close. Don’t stop!”

“Touch me, Sam. Go over the edge with me. Come with me.”

My hands grab at his chest and dig in. The carnal growl he lets out provokes another round of heavy slamming. The pressure slowly builds until I can’t take it anymore. The sharp electrical currents tear through my body as I scream his name.

“Fuck!” is all he manages to yell as my core tightens around him, and he empties into me.

We lay in each other’s arms in the quiet and stillness of the night. No words have been spoken, and I bask in the silence. None are needed. Occasionally, his fingers draw lazy circles down my arm and up my back, which soothe my sated, but weary, body. The movements are gentle and loving—the complete opposite of what we just did. I can’t help but laugh at the irony of it.

Ben’s head pops up to look at me. “What’s so funny?”

“Nothing.”

“Oh, come on. What made you giggle?”

Now my whole body pops up at his statement. “Seriously? I don’t giggle? I despise girls who giggle.”

“I hate to break it to you, babe, but that’s a giggle.”

My hand covers my mouth in disgust. “Shit. Did you turn me into a giggler?”

“Ha! I don’t know about that. If the sounds you’re making are from the result of what we just did, then I will gladly take the credit.” He playfully pulls me toward him and kisses me on the tip of my nose. “So, I’ll ask again. What had you giggling?”

I smack him jokingly on the chest before resting my hands on him. “I’m laughing because your touch is so different from a few minutes ago when you weren’t quite so tame.”

“Oh yeah? That was definitely rough. I kind of got a little out of hand. Did I ... umm … are you okay?” I watch the look of concern build in his eyes while he strokes my cheek.

“No. I’m fine. More than fine. I’m perfectly wonderful. I may be a bit sore tomorrow, but it was
so
worth it.” He tugs me by the arms so our lips meet. It’s a slow and sensual kiss—the kind that promises more to come. Breaking away, he rolls me over onto my back. His mouth opens as if to say something, but he quickly shuts it. My fingers reach out to graze across his lips to give him permission to speak.

Ben kisses my nose again before talking. “I know we have things to figure out, but can we just be?”

“Just be?”

“Yeah, just be. Be in this moment, right here, right now. Be here with me. Just be.”

“You wreck me, Ben Foster. Totally and utterly wreck me. But yeah, let’s just be.” Smiling like he just won the lottery, he lavishes me with kisses on my lips, cheeks, and neck.
And here come the fucking giggles. It’s official. I’m a giggler. Damn him.

“I do wish I could change one thing about tonight.” His look is solemn.

“What’s that?

“I wish I hadn’t been a pussy when you asked me to dance.” I can’t help but laugh at his statement. “I watched you out there. You lit up the room, and I couldn’t take my eyes off you. It killed me to see you in another man’s arms when mine ached to hold you.” He sits up abruptly and reaches for something on his nightstand.

I sit up next to him. “You know, I felt your eyes on me, watching me all night. Why did you say no?”

“I was scared. I knew if I touched you, my last bit of self-control would vanish. And I was right.” He winks and reaches for my hand. “But I can make my wish come true.”

“You can?”

“Yep. Dance with me, Sam?”

“Right here?”

He pulls me off the bed to stand on the hardwood floor. The soft glow of the moonlight provides the only light. His hand presses some buttons on a remote and soft music begins to play. “Okay, music freak. Name this one.”

I listen to the first few notes and recognize it instantly. “
Christina Perri, “Arms
.” It’s one of my favorites.”

“Mine too. So what do you say? Dance with me. Please. Let me make this right.”

I don’t answer him. I simply wrap my arms around his neck and move into him as close as I can. His arms reach around my waist, holding me tenderly. We stand there swaying to the music. Truly naked and bare—both physically and emotionally—my heart pangs when she sings about feeling home with your lover’s arms around you. My mind drifts back to our conversation several weeks ago about finding home. And here we are, dancing, arms around each other, and I realize that I am home. I risk a glance upward, nervous at what I may see in his eyes. His eyes will tell me what I need to know. It’s only a brief flash, but it was there. Home.