The Ultimate Guide to Cunnilingus (13 page)

• Try gently taking her clit in your teeth and holding it, lightly flicking with your tongue.

• Penetrate her vagina (or anus) with your stiff tongue; this is known as tongue fucking. Not all women go crazy for it—if she’s really aroused it may not provide a firm enough stimulation—but some will enjoy it in the beginning stages of cunnilingus. Use it sparingly (unless, of course, she loves it); intersperse a series of tongue fucks with another favored technique.

• When your mouth makes full contact, try moaning appreciatively—your mouth and tongue will vibrate her vulva, a delicious sensation in itself. If you’re not shy, hum a tune.

Strokes and Combinations

A through Z and back again; by the fourth repetition I had a hand at the back of my head pushing.

I treat the vulva with the same care and creativity I treat my partner’s mouth when I’m kissing. You wouldn’t just lick your lover’s upper lip over and over again, would you?

There are as many strokes to use in cunnilingus as you can imagine—literally. I’m going to suggest quite a few, but the trick is to pick some, try them in combination for a while, and then begin to focus your licks on the areas she responds to pleasurably. The strokes are the filling, the yummy, sweet part that gives your session body and length and builds her pleasure up to dizzying heights. As you try combinations of strokes, you’ll notice that she is becoming more and more turned on. You’ll also notice that she really responds when you lick her in a certain area, such as on the side of her clitoral shaft, or on the glans itself. Always keep your upper lip curled protectively over your teeth—a nip at the wrong moment is shocking. When she starts to respond to focused stimulation around her clitoris, you’ll begin your rhythm. The following strokes are your road to rhythm.

• Lick lazy circles around her clit.

• Lick side to side or up and down, nipping with your lips between directions.

• Use short, rapid upward strokes, alternated with dipping into her vagina.

• Lick in circles combined with open-mouthed embraces.

• Alternate between circles and side-to-side licks.

• Run your tongue back and forth across her inner lips, then use gentle suction on the lips.

• Use the same technique on the clitoris.

• Alternate small, focused circles on either side of the hood.

• With your tongue tip, lick in the furrows from top to bottom, pressing in gradually with each stroke.

• Lick, plunge in; lick, plunge in.

• Start with “ice-cream” licks up and down, followed with down strokes with your fingertips or flattened thumbs.

• Swirl your tongue in the space between her hood and mons, and rub the outer labia with flattened fingers.

• Lick the ABC’s on her vulva. Start with A and go from there—capitals, lowercase, cursive, secret messages. This method is an old standby.

I once took a Fairy Butch class, and she gave me my favorite tip: place both hands over the mons, creating a diamond shape with the open space between index fingers and thumbs while you lick, and rest your nose on your index fingers. It supports my face while holding open the labia, and it is easier on my neck.

Rhythm

Let’s review our progress. You began with the first licks, making first contact with your hot little mouth on your gal’s equally hot vulva. Next, you seduced her pussy and built upon layers of pleasure by using different mouth techniques, and found a pleasing configuration of strokes to use. Finally, you found a stroke that really worked and began to concentrate your efforts there—on the side of the shaft, or even on the tip of the clitoris.

It stands to reason that once she’s very aroused and close to orgasm, she probably won’t know exactly what your tongue is doing; she’ll just know if it feels good or not. It’s up to you to remember what worked and what didn’t.

Now you’re rhythmically licking the area that’s making her clutch the sheets (or use your ears as handles). If so, what you’re doing is working, there’s no denying it. Establish a steady rhythm, gradually (barely) increasing the pressure but not the pace of your efforts. If it seems that an orgasm is imminent, then don’t change anything—just keep doing whatever you’re doing, no matter what! Her clit or the area around it may pulse as the muscles contract: this is a direct response to your rhythm and is a signal not to stop.

There is an urban legend of sorts that the since the rhythmic contractions of orgasm occur every 7/10 of a second, the rhythm of cunnilingus is best paced to this beat. The truth is, it’s just more orgasmic babble: for us women, there is no rhythm that magically makes an orgasm. The sure-fire way to participate in triggering an orgasm is to pay attention to the location, pressure, and timing of your tongue that your gal responds to. Communication has much to do with it, and although taking the time to pause and ask may break the mood, let her know beforehand that it’s okay to say words like “harder, softer, left, right,” and “like that.” Only she can guide you to her orgasm.

How to Be a Mind Reader (Well, Almost)

I have a huge orgasm almost every time my girlfriend eats me out. When I want it harder I push my pelvis closer to her, and when I want it softer I back up a little. When I come she presses in further, and sometimes I come again right away.

But how do you know what she’s responding to, and what it means? Unlike with a man, the female sexual response cycle will have your lover dancing to her own internal music. Asking her what’s going on is ideal, though not always practical or even possible.

Learning to take cues from her body language is key, especially when she’s in the throes of arousal. She’ll let you know if she wants more of anything by either telling you, moving her pelvis—closer, away, right, or left—or repositioning you. There’s always the risk that she might aggressively pull your head down with her hands, grinding upward into your face, grabbing your ears or hair—an enviable risk to run. When in doubt, try having her show you what she likes; take her hand and gently place it where you’re unsure.

Bump and Grind: Orgasmic Body Language

Breathing is a real trick, especially if the respondee is a real wet one. Coming up for air and holding my breath seems to work right before she slips off the edge.

Back to the grind: How can you tell if an orgasm is imminent and the signs are not obvious? Maybe she’s not crowing “I’m coming!” to the neighbors across the street. When she’s close she’ll be rocking her pelvis, sometimes subtly, sometimes with force, upward into your mouth. She could slowly seem to be getting closer and closer to your face, maybe even pushing you down to the bottom of the bed or shoving her vulva in your mouth. Conversely, if she seems to be getting away from you and you keep having to move to reach her, or she is visibly pulling away, then you’re probably applying more pressure than is comfortable. If you can’t tell which, don’t be afraid to ask—she might really appreciate it. You can tell her to put your face where she wants it by guiding your head.

I try not to feel pressure to make her come; instead I just enjoy the moment and love what I’m doing—and, more often than not, she does come.

A bucking pelvis belongs to a woman about to come, a woman with a smiling vulva if ever there was one. Grinding indicates she wants a slow increase in your tongue’s tempo—though orgasmic indications can be as subtle as quickened breath and muscle tension in her abdomen. Hang on if you can, for the dear life of her orgasm. Wrap your arms around her thighs and hold on to her hips or buttocks if you’re worried about getting bucked off or inadvertently shoving your teeth through your upper lip. Gripping her like this can heighten her pleasure, and it sends some gals over the edge. If she loves this, she might also like to have her thighs immobilized before orgasm: simply hold them firmly still. Also try putting her legs together: though this makes licking somewhat difficult, holding the thighs together and flexing them helps many women achieve orgasm—it is how some women learn to masturbate. If after all the bucking and grinding is over you feel like a cowpoke with whiplash, you may want to talk about it later.

Illustration 10. Orgasm

I always worry about mashing my teeth into someone’s squishy parts!

No one orgasm is better, stronger, faster—the sixmillion dollar orgasm—they all rock her world. Make each one sweet with good post-orgasm etiquette. If she instructs you to stop or keep going, then by all means, do so! If she just seems to be sinking into a pleasant (but quiet) moment, then smile, touch and caress her lightly, hold her if you desire, tell her how beautiful she is and how good she makes you feel. Or say nothing, and savor the moment.

Orgasm

When she orgasms, right before the blissful contractions begin, the clitoris retracts and pulls itself close to the pubic bone—partially explaining why more pressure feels good. There are many types of orgasms, for as many ways in which we can perceive pleasure. They vary in length (on average anywhere from five seconds to three minutes) and can arrive in groups. Some orgasms will be sweat-drenched, pussy-pulsing, head-crushing events; others will expire with nary a sigh of released breath and a lovely glow to her cheeks. And then there’s everything in between.

During orgasm, you may be either pushed away from her vulva or pulled closer (smashed!) to her clitoris; freeze, and stay that way until you feel her body relax. Right after orgasm, her clit is going to feel very sensitive, so holding still is a good idea. You can lightly kiss her vulva, but do not begin to lick her clit again unless you know she is multiorgasmic and directs you to. Make your way up to her eye level and see what she feels like doing next. For partners sensitive about cleanliness and scent, be sure to wipe your face with a damp washcloth (the one you thoughtfully placed by the bed earlier) before you kiss her on the face or lips. However, there are some gals who will grab you and plant one right on your mouth, eager to see how they taste. That’s the nice thing about oral sex: it’s enjoyable regardless of your comfort level with sex—the universal pleasure!

Blue Denim Pussy

BY ALISON TYLER

“So, what do you think?” Sasha asked, twirling around in front of Dan, letting him see her long legs, her tight ass, her slim waist, all contained in a pair of new, tight-fitting jeans. He didn’t respond immediately, taking in the way she looked. She was sleek in her long-sleeved black blouse, birch-colored hair up in a ponytail, green eyes wide while she waited for his answer. Still, he couldn’t actually think of anything to say. Anything except the fact that he was going to fuck her. Here. Now.

“Tell me,” she urged, tilting her head to look past him at her own reflection in the dressing room mirror. “Your honest opinion.”

Still silent, he took one step toward her in the small space and grabbed hold of her hand. His fingers slid upward to close firmly around her delicate wrist, like a pair of handcuffs snapping shut. Something in the gesture made Sasha forget what she was asking and pay attention to the looks Dan was giving her.

“Come here,” he said, and she closed the space between them as he placed his free palm over the crotch of her jeans and let her feel his large hand against her cunt. Instantly, she rested her pussy on his hand, pressed into him, and he began to do the most intricate, marvelous things with his fingers. Dancing them up and down. Massaging her through the denim. Stroking just hard enough for her to lean her head back and sigh.